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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To wonder if any of you are retired, and what did it feel like?

70 replies

Lydiaatthebarre · 12/10/2018 16:05

A woman in work is retiring today and is quite choked up and tearful about it. We're all saying that we'll have a big smile on our faces when it's our turn to go, but in reality I know that it must be quite a strange day and I can imagine feeling a mixture of euphoria and sadness.

Just wondering if any retired MNetters can remember how they felt on their very last day at work?

OP posts:
thenightsky · 15/10/2018 14:27

I retired (3 years early) from the NHS recently. I walked round with a massive grin on my face all the time in the last week. Had a low key lunch time do and when I had to speak to say 'thanks for the gift, its been great working with you all', I did feel a lump in my throat, especially when someone called out 'she's gonna get all tearful now'. Luckily my horrible boss was there doing my presentation, so I only had to glance at his ugly mug to bring back my smile Grin

PoisonousSmurf · 15/10/2018 14:30

I don't think I'll ever be able to retire. It's a pipe dream for most people.
The reality is...get replaced, redundant, get ill, go on benefits, be forced to look for a job and then find out NO ONE wants old people and then end up on the street.
Bleak, but I can't see anything good in the future.

SweetSummerchild · 15/10/2018 14:34

I was awarded ill health retirement from teaching almost a year ago. I absolutely love it.

I don’t have any regrets. I don’t miss work. I find plenty to occupy my time. I don’t miss the adult company as I have made a whole new circle of friends through voluntary work and activities.

Ironically, I now dislike the school holidays....

SweetSummerchild · 15/10/2018 14:35

I retired at 42.

nuttyknitter · 15/10/2018 14:37

I felt emotional in the day to be saying goodbye to so many wonderful colleagues and clients but I have never missed it. Mind you, my DGD was born two months later and I've had two more DGC since then and have absolutely loved having the time to be involved in their lives.

longwayoff · 15/10/2018 14:38

Happily retired. Weirdly, sitting in my nightclothes with an extra coffee at 10am, I ponder on how on earth I managed to get up, showered, hairwashed, made up and dressed and out for the 6.50 to Waterloo for so many years. In retrospect seems like a miracle.

abitlosthere · 15/10/2018 14:43

Ha, yes @longwayoff I now wonder how I managed to endure commuting!

longwayoff · 15/10/2018 15:04

Indeed! Have another coffeeBrewCakeSmile

QueenoftheNights · 15/10/2018 16:28

I am still working in my early 60s but am self employed. I could stop whenever I want to, but like the stimulation from work and the 'meaning' it gives to my life- I trained for what I do. My work takes anything from 2- 3 half days a week, sometimes more, and that's fine for me now.

There is a lot of evidence that stopping work hastens and early death, mental decline and illnesses.

I think if people retire early they need to replace it with something else even if it's unpaid.

QueenoftheNights · 15/10/2018 16:29

Sad that so many people want to leave work because they hate it.
Why not get out and find something else you enjoy?

Original poster
Lydiaatthebarre · 15/10/2018 16:36

It's not always that easy Queen. Also, when you've been working fulltime and commuting for many years I think it's quite natural to want some of your life back, to do the things you enjoy.

I agree that sitting at home all day watching telly wouldn't be very healthy. But retiring from work to pursue other interests and have more time for family/friends can lead to a more fulfilling life for many people.

No matter how much you like your job, full on structured days and long commutes can wear thin as you get older.

OP posts:
Accountant222 · 15/10/2018 16:50

I retired officially a few years ago, I was lucky to have a final salary pension which I could access at 50, the company I worked for, were closing my division.

I had about 10 months notice, in all honesty I had more pleasure about thinking of retirement than actually doing it.

First few months I had loads of holidays, then winter happened, I was bored rigid and started my own business, which I still do, only part time though.

It terrifies me, retiring again, but it will come.

Barbie222 · 15/10/2018 17:05

Can't wait. There are so many things I'd like to do. Just hope I won't be too old and crinkly to enjoy them!

I've never cried at leaving a job or ever looked back on one really so maybe I'm just a bit hard and unemotional that way.

blue25 · 15/10/2018 17:17

I love my job, but can't wait to retire. There's so much to do/see & I don't want to spend my whole life working. Looking forward to having much more time for hobbies, travel & just having fun.

tillytrotter1 · 15/10/2018 23:47

I found myself trotting to the loo at breaktime, I was so conditioned

My friends and I, all escapees from the chalkface, still tend to talk about terms, We'll have a catch up at half term!

Off topic but when my baby was born and I went up to the library, medical centre etc in the army camp whether I drove or walked I found myself going round the one way system! We're like Pavlov's dogs in so many ways.

Disquieted1 · 15/10/2018 23:59

40 years is a big hole to fill.
Most people on this thread seem to have a wonderful retirement, but I wonder if confirmation bias is kicking in? Those who regret retiring are maybe less likely to post.

florenceheadache · 16/10/2018 00:30

i retired from nursing after 30 years with my last employer. worked in nursing since 19. my pension is excellent and i could access the un-reduced amount starting at 57 (which is when i retired).
by the time i retired many of my close friends had either retired before me or were off on some sort of disability.
i knew my job was not being replaced and restructuring was in progress. two years before my job was cut from full time to part time plus.
i was ready, i have good health, and had put in my time.
not only did i leave my career, but the next week i moved from a small rural outpost type location to a city.
i've been retired full time now for 4 years, i've yet to feel the urge for a jobbette or volunteering.
i love sleeping in, doing my housework in my pj's and not following any schedule.
facebook helps me stay in touch with friends and family just enough.
no regrets.

fifithefoof · 16/10/2018 00:36

I'm 5 years in and not regretting it. It's bloody lovely!

Cornishclio · 16/10/2018 01:22

I retired early at 58 last December, a year after my DH who also retired at 58. The only thing I thought I would miss about work are my colleagues but I have managed to keep up with them by seeing them socially. Lots of upheaval over the last few years of my working life pre empted my decision to take early retirement.

We spend more time on hobbies, socialising and looking after grandchildren, holidays etc. Best thing we ever did.

Singlenotsingle · 16/10/2018 01:32

I got made redundant at 60, but luckily I've got a company pension and with the State pension as well, money isn't a problem. And retirement is very nice. There's still plenty to do to keep busy though - heavily involved helping with small grandchildren, there's the dog, house, garden, dp. It's not alsitting around drinking wine and eating cake (although some of that goes on. Ddil is a good cake maker!)l

Wingedharpy · 16/10/2018 02:57

I sort of drifted into retirement.
I had a 3 month career break from work and then went back.
After working for another year, I took another career break of 6 months but just didn't want to go back when the 6 months were up, so I didn't.
I did give them notice that I wouldn't be returning, I didn't just not bother turning up again.

I just love being retired and can honestly say it's been the happiest time of my life.

I'm fortunate to have a DH who I like and get along with, most days!

We both have a reasonable pension so aren't strapped for cash to pay bills etc.

We enjoy fairly good health and keep active.

What I love most is actually living in the moment.
I don't wish the days away to my next days off or my next lot of annual leave - I just enjoy the here and now.
I don't feel the need to cram every waking moment with "things I must do before my free time runs out".
That was a common feeling I had when I worked full time - the need to fill every day off work doing things, because if I didn't do it then, I wouldn't have chance once back at work.

Some of my happiest times have been days when I've done nothing at all - just something I would never have done when I worked.

Living life according to your own timetable is, for me, the best part of retirement.
I'm very grateful for my circumstances and feel thankful I'm lucky enough to be here enjoying them.

MorrisZapp · 16/10/2018 16:56

My friends mum retired from the same job four times. Each time she swore she wouldn't be going back, and each time being at home with her very finicky long retired husband sent her scuttling back.

I think she only retired the final time out of embarrassment.

MorrisZapp · 16/10/2018 17:02

Ok naive question time, don't slate me. If your mortgage is paid off, would 150 quid a week not cover food, bills, and a bit of entertainment?

CloudPop · 16/10/2018 17:04

My only concern would be finances. Other than that, I guess I would miss the interaction so would be important to me to have something lined up that kept me engaged with people and something to keep my head busy with.

Jaxhog · 16/10/2018 17:08

Everytime I get close to retirement age, it goes up! I thought I'd retire at 60, and planned accordingly. Unfortunately I'm still working, albeit part-time.