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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be irritated by wanky and pretentious restaurant terminology?

305 replies

ManicUnicorn · 12/10/2018 15:37

I should start by saying I love food and eating out, it's one of life's great pleasures IMO. But I'm finding myself increasingly irritated by restaurants using pretentious and fancy names for stuff and trying to dress things up as more exotic than they actually are.

A new restaurant has just opened here and I was looking at their Christmas menu earlier, and amongst lots of the wankery on there one of the deserts really stood out 'Rich orchard apples in crumble with creme anglais'... so that'll be apple crumble and custard then? Why not just say what it is? A hearty and much loved traditional British pudding that's been enjoyed for years, you don't need to dress it up as anything else! Oh and there's so much 'jus' on there as well, it's just fucking gravy for Christ's sake!

It reminds me of when I went out for a Christmas meal a few years ago. Set menu, and were all wondering what the hell one the starters was. Someone googled it and guess what? It was just a fancy name for soup.

I don't know if I'm just a bit common but I think there's something so pretentious about this kind of thing. Food is food at the end of the day.

OP posts:
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MorningsEleven · 13/10/2018 06:30

I work in traditional tea rooms. I might try to improve ourcustomer experience today by asking if I can explain the concept of a cream tea, deconstructing the egg and cress sandwiches and serving everything directly onto the tables.

Obviouspretzel · 13/10/2018 06:41

I agree with kmc111. A lot of this is just describing the food as what it is.

Not in the case of a "rich, orchard apple" (can apples be rich? All apples are from orchards...) but certainly most of the others.

Obviouspretzel · 13/10/2018 06:42

Also, mushy peas and pea puree are two completely different things. If I wanted one and got the other, I'd be annoyed.

StealthPolarBear · 13/10/2018 06:42

I've started to notice lemon posset. I can only assume it's lemon-flavoured baby sick. Nice.

StealthPolarBear · 13/10/2018 06:44

And I agree with the stupid coffee sizes. Seems like venti is a size. Why not just describe them using terms for size we already have an understand? Presumably as there's a move to us all taking our own mugs this nonsense will stop.

cheshireagain · 13/10/2018 07:06

The WORST is when companies try to be fancy but get it wrong!

When we were picking our wedding menu, we wanted a cold starter, something along the lines of a bruschetta or caprese salad.

He kept suggesting an ANTI PASTA

I presume he meant Antipasti?!

It was his bloody company and they've won lots of awards

HarrySinger · 13/10/2018 07:25

I find the over the top descriptions very amusing - but the food sometime suffers from raised expectations. I hate having the concept of a restaurant explained to me - my heart sinks when at waiter asks if this is our first time visiting them and then proceeds to explain how it all works...or worse we weren't allowed the menu until the owner came over to present and explain it to us, we had to beg for the drinks menu...jeez that was a long night!

StealthPolarBear · 13/10/2018 07:27

What is so complex about these restaurants where the concept needs explaining?

Whatabloodytravesty · 13/10/2018 07:37

I totally agree with you OP
Coincidentally last night my DD sent me a picture of her dinner at a 'posh' restaurant in town.
Se asked them if they'd run out of platesGrin
Who wants their dinner on a baking tray?! This beauty set her back £20Shock

To be irritated by wanky and pretentious restaurant terminology?
OftenHangry · 13/10/2018 07:43

Not in a wanky restaurant though Often , I'm not talking Wetherspoons!
Nor am I😂

Who would have guessed people can have so amazing and funny discussion about a... Potato. 😂

BarbaraofSevillle · 13/10/2018 07:50

Jewelled food

I think that means it's got pomegranate seeds sprinkled over it.

StripySocksAndDocs · 13/10/2018 08:01

I feel a little cheated OP, surely things can be far more wanky than 'Rich orchard apples in crumble with creme anglais'?

'Sumptuous hand-selected orchard apples clothed with a disintegrated top perfected by its creme anglais companion'

^ that's what I'd want for wanky and probably twice the price

Starryskiesinthesky · 13/10/2018 08:26

I liked this pudding serving 😆

To be irritated by wanky and pretentious restaurant terminology?
plominoagain · 13/10/2018 09:13

I’ll tell you what irritates me - the concept of negative space on a plate . You get two mushrooms and a sesame tuile precariously balanced on a smidge of cauliflower purée , on barely a quarter of the left hand side of the place and NOTHING else . Apparently it’s supposed to ‘help create sophisticated and aesthetically pleasing plates, and piques the diner’s interest before the food has even been tasted.’

Bollocks . It’s an empty plate and I’m still hungry .

Bimgy85 · 13/10/2018 11:55

Well really if you think about it, removing the €/£ sign from a menu isn't 'wanky' it's actually saving space I'm sure on a menu.

'I don't want or need to be marketed to in a restaurant I'm already in'

Wow so stubborn Hmm

kitkatsky · 13/10/2018 12:32

Ha! I was looking for a nice lunch venue in Soho for me and DP to celebrate our anniversary at the end of the month when we visit London- I thought short horn beef steak was a bit much. I don't really care what the Dow looks like as long as it tastes good!

ainsisoisje · 13/10/2018 14:08

Crème anglaise is a bit runnier than custard I thought?

SteamTrainsRealAleandOpenFires · 13/10/2018 16:04

I’ll tell you what irritates me - the concept of negative space on a plate . You get two mushrooms and a sesame tuile precariously balanced on a smidge of cauliflower purée , on barely a quarter of the left hand side of the place and NOTHING else . Apparently it’s supposed to ‘help create sophisticated and aesthetically pleasing plates, and piques the diner’s interest before the food has even been tasted.’

Bollocks . It’s an empty plate and I’m still hungry

Sounds like a 21stC version of the 80's/yuppies Nouvelle cuisine.

AnotherGreenDot · 13/10/2018 16:26

Food served on chopping boards is really off putting. They might have been chopping raw meat on it earlier 🤢

Myimaginarycathasfleas · 13/10/2018 17:51

Just read a Waitrose recipe for roast chicken with “pomme purée”. Not apples. Potatoes. Mashed potatoes.

Ta1kinpeace · 13/10/2018 18:09

YANBU

I have sent dishes served on pretentious planks of wood back to the kitchen to be brought back to me on a white plate so I can see what I am eating.

The waiter could not hide his delight

Foxyloxy1plus1 · 13/10/2018 18:21

‘Freshly made’ annoys me. Are you planning to sell out of date food or stale sandwiches then?

toxic44 · 13/10/2018 18:54

What goes hand in hand with the snobbish foolery is spreading the meal around the plate and surrounding it with blobs of sauce. Recently a friend had a raviolo (ONE) on a 3cms square of cod with several dots of pureed spinach on the plate rim. That was the starter and a magnificent £18 a throw. If someone stupid enough to go for that, they deserve all they get - or don't get, lol!

Scoobygang7 · 13/10/2018 19:18

@OutPinked sweary link foamy the squirrel coffee size rant

Geekster1963 · 13/10/2018 20:17

OP I’m in complete agreement with you. Me and DH went to this posh wedding a few years ago and we had coulis I said it’s just runny jam!

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