AIBU?
Annoying sister
madmumoffourBHTJ · 11/10/2018 23:49
Hi, am I the only one who has a competitive sister?
We both fell pregnant around the same time me with my 4th baby, sister with her first, our due dates were a week apart. We both had complications. And even with that everything had to me made about her. If I posted about my pregnancy she had to comment and make it about her, then she would post her own status..bare in mind we also have a lot of mutual friends. The whole pregnancy, on her part, who could be better, who was having the worst time and the big one who would have their baby first. Despite knowing the complications, she still asked me to be her birthing partner.
I think it's fair to say I did not enjoy my pregnancy, I couldn't do anything without her trying to do better. Don't get me wrong I love my sister dearly but I just wish she would have backed off a little seen as this was going to be my last baby and I just wanted to enjoy the pregnancy even with the complications.
So, sis had her baby first, she was pretty upset that I dint visit them in hospital, I was on bed rest, orders by midwife. I had my baby 5 weeks later. We tried to keep photos and announcements off social media till we were back home, but my sister posted and announced that her nephew was here before did.
And with both babies here it's even worse...my baby can't do nothing without her baby doing it or already did or she's jealous her baby hasn't rolled over or crawled. My baby can't meet someone without her self inviting with her baby.
Like I said I love my sister dearly but how do I tell her to back off without offending or upsetting her? Anyone else been through similar with friends or family?
JellieEllie · 12/10/2018 00:16
It's her first baby. Everything her baby does will (to her) seem like it's the only baby in the entire world to have ever have done that.
I don't think she is trying to be a shit to you, more a case of she's extremely excited that she has brought this little being into the world and she's amazed by every milestone it achieves.
You have already previously had 3 babies and so you know what to expect.
I think it's sweet that she wants to be involved in everything with you, including meeting new people with the babies etc. It's not every day sisters have babies so close in age after all.
Embrace it and enjoy this time with your new baby and your new niece/nephew.
It's a little crap that she posted your new arrival before you had the chance to but she's clearly very proud of you and excited to have a new member of the family.
I hope things get better for you but just try not to see it as a competition and use it as a way of bringing your bond closer together.
Havaina · 12/10/2018 00:22
Don't tell her your plans and them off facebook.
Have a whatsapp group with your close friends (assuming they're not mutual) and make arrangements there. If she wants to come ove and it's not convenient, tell her that DC aren't well so it's not a great time. Alternatively visit her so you can leave when you need to.
Just because she's your sister and you love doesn't mean you have to indulge her every time.
Why do you have mutual friends? Does she have a history of climging to you? Sounds annoying.
garethsouthgatesmrs · 12/10/2018 00:27
Given its your 4th I think I would, relax and let her have her moment, you know its all bollocks. Agree with taking details/photos of things off facebook and just enjoying your baby.
we have 3 children and haven't put any of them on social media, it's been just as joyous and wonderful!
BackforGood · 12/10/2018 00:41
What JellieEllie said.
It is her first baby. Everything is exciting and amazing and wondrous. Let her have her time.
KC225 · 12/10/2018 00:42
It' was her first and consciously or subconsciously she wanted her new mum moment. As it was your fourth - could you not have let her have her time. It was all new for her - its PFB (precious first born) not PFB (precious fourth born).
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