Gingeredrogers what a dickish thing to sit and think up a whole negative back story for someone doing a kind deed.
Actually I’ve come across people who do this kind of ‘kind deed’ in offices before. It’s never really about doing a kind deed itself, it’s because they want to be seen and be noticed to be doing a kind deed.
It’s always the latest fad, is performed in a way deliberately showy way so that it will be noticed and people will talk about how ‘kind’ she (it is always a she) is and it’s usually of sod all benefit to anybody because it’s done in response to a news story or campaign. And they’re always the sort of person that if you need a genuine favour off which will immeasurably help someone but won’t get them any attention, add to their general enjoyment of drama or gild their vision of their own loveliness they’re just not interested. And they can turn quite nasty if they don’t think a colleague has been sufficiently appreciative of their bountifulness.
I’ve actually managed a several of these types over the years and many of their colleagues regard them as overbearing pains in the arse who will draw attention to other people’s personal problems just because they want to advertise how kind and giving they are being to ‘poor Emily in accounts, she has the most horrendous periods you know, bleeds 2 weeks out of every 3’.
The people I’ve worked with who’ve been the kindest and most caring things for their colleagues would always do them in almost total secrecy and I would only occasionally find out about them because their colleagues sometimes felt they needed to let someone senior know how much they had been supported often through difficult times. I’ve been told before that a colleague, without being asked, helped another colleague in the last months of her husband’s life by making sure she had a prepared cold lunch and a home cooked dinner to stick in the microwave every single day along with checking her breakfast and household supplies and making sure she had things like toilet roll and washing up liquid and another did all her laundry for her and popped in to help with the housework and both of them helped with her (very small) children. Genuine kindness and neither told a soul, let alone make up some self aggrandising ‘fairy’ story about themselves.
That’s partly why attention seeking do-gooders have to do these rather random not particularly useful acts. They’re never really the person colleagues would confide in if they had period pains. They’d have to tell people they’d done a good deed so would gossip about it.
Oh! And every single one of them would be straight into the office in a flash if a colleague did something pleasant and they felt their ‘good fairy, lady bountiful’ titles were threatened. Bring a cake on? Straight down to the manager complaining about no allergens label. Birthday buns? Contain milk and eggs? Well that’s not inclusive as allergies are a disability. Give a colleague a lift? Complains it shouldn’t be allowed as you might discuss work and she’d be out of the loop.
Honestly - they’re such a type. They’re also usually shit at their jobs and spend most of their time chatting, internet shopping or messaging their mates or making twee internet fairy baskets. They think ‘but everybody says I’m lovely’ is a defence against an appraisal that says ‘You’ve only done about a week’s worth of work in the last year’.
Like I said. Several of them. Fucking pains. Big time form with me. Real kindness doesn’t demand attention.