AIBU?
To worry about the impact university would have on our TTC plans?
PoesyCherish · 10/10/2018 16:58
I really want to go back to university and retrain - NHS role most likely upon graduating and 100% of students are in professional jobs after graduating according to the universities and people I've spoken to who work in the area.
I'm 27 and DP is 34. I'm worried about the impact going to university would have on our TTC plans. If I got accepted for 2019 entry, I would be 31 upon graduating. By the time I get a job and get settled I'd be 32 and DP would be 39.
We'd previously discussed TTC towards the end of next year although obviously this is unlikely to happen if I got accepted to university. DP thinks it'd be fine to TTC whilst I'm at university. I'm fine with the time commitments etc however I'm worried about finances. We're entitled to the bare minimum of finance (DP earns 50k; 600pcm of that pays for child maintenance and it'd be my second degree). I'm not sure how we could afford a DC and put them in childcare so I can finish my degree.
Unfortunately DP doesn't feel ready to start TTC now and I'm hating my job so wouldn't want to delay my university application by a few years. So it looks like having a baby before university isn't an option.
Anyone been in a similar situation and have any advice?
PurpleOctober · 10/10/2018 17:10
If you TTC at university how will you finish your course? Or start an NHS job with a newborn?
I think you need to think about this seriously, starting a course and then having a baby half way through isn't ideal as it will take even longer to finish the course if you can even go back. And having a baby striaght after the course will make it harder to find a job after a gap from training.
32 isn't old, but obviously no one knows about their fertility until they start trying.
I would go to uni if I were you and better yourself, no point putting it off if you're hating your job on the off chance your DP will change his mind about TTC now.
mindutopia · 10/10/2018 17:16
31/32 isn’t too old. I had my first half way through doing a PhD at 32. That was the perfect age for me really as it meant we had time together as a couple first and I was well on the way towards my career goals by the time she was born. I took a year off from my degree and then went back a further 2.5 years after that. The hard bit is childcare when you aren’t earning much. I had to work while doing my degree and we basically asked for family to give us money towards nursery instead of birthday and Christmas gifts for a few years! But it was doable with support. I just had my 2nd at 38. I have a career I enjoy now and can afford a good chunk of time at home before I return to work.
PoesyCherish · 10/10/2018 19:20
@PurpleOctober we'd save like crazy between now and then, put DC into nursery whilst I finish the degree and get a job etc. In an ideal world we'd have DC in my 2nd year so we'd only have a year or two of childcare to pay for whilst not earning much. I guess worst case is that we wouldn't be able to conceive during the degree (we'd stop after a certain point as I wouldn't want to give birth in my final year) but we'd still have a nice chunk of savings behind us.
Thinking about it logically, even if DP was up for TTC now that still wouldn't help us financially would it as we'd still need to put DC in nursery whilst I studied and then it'd be for the full three years instead of just 1/2.
I'm glad it worked out for you @mindutopia.
I think 31/32 isn't too old but with the 7 year age gap it makes us think a bit more. Also we both really wanted to start TTC end of next year / start of 2020 so it's trying to find a compromise that works for both of us.
GeorgiePirate · 10/10/2018 19:38
What degree programme are you thinking of? We have a small number of students who go into abeyance due to pregnancy and we do take into account of carer responsibilities when allocating to clinical placements but it is full on and quite tough. Depending on your programme of study you may be working 12 hour shifts etc. Have you looked into the course structure in detail?
PoesyCherish · 11/10/2018 08:49
@GeorgiePirate thanks for your message. I'm applying to do a Healthcare Science degree. The universities I'm looking at are typically 50ish weeks placement over the 3 years. When on placement students are expected to work 9-5 Monday to Friday. Do you think if a student has DC they'd be less likely to be placed in a hospital really far away?
PoesyCherish · 11/10/2018 08:51
Also wrt the students going into abeyance during pregnancy, is that their choice or the university's? Obviously as a preference if I fell pregnant during my degree I'd want to hang on for as long as possible and not have to leave really early on in the pregnancy.
I also wonder how it would work if I gave birth halfway through a year. Would I have to resit the year? Would I just return 12 months later at a similar point to where I left?
GeorgiePirate · 11/10/2018 09:26
Hello. I work in a slightly different field (AHP) so our students are frontline clinical staff. During pregnancy a student must be able to complete their clinical placement before 36 weeks pregnancy. We also require a letter confirming the student is fit to practice.
Going into abeyance is essentially pressing a pause button on your studies. In our programme it depends how far into the academic year the student has progressed. On this basis a decision would be taken as to whether they restart the year (with a subsequent cohort) or if they complete individual modules.
We take into account travel time and distance for clinical but, our students must complete a range of experience so this is also taken into account. All BSc programmes have a maximum registration period too so it would be worth looking into this depending on how long you would take away after the birth.
To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.