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AIBU?

to be scared of induction/c section?

25 replies

CheNina · 09/10/2018 13:24

I'm 36 weeks pregnant. Tough pregnancy. Anomaly found at 20 week scan. Growth slowed at 35 weeks. Now have high PI through umbilical cord and having lots of scans and dopplers.

Everything was fine for me to go to MLU until a week ago, when growth scan showed slight decline in growth. Now potentially looking at induction which I don't particularly want, or a c section (which is a heightened risk also with induction).

DH only has a week of leave to spend with baby because of his job posting, and I have no family nearby so a c section terrifies me as I don't know how I will cope on my own. I don't have a support network and certainly nobody who would pop round to give me a hand.

I really don't want an induction as as much as people share their positive stories, the majority that I have heard have been awful. Resulted in c section and interventions. My mum had a terrible experience and my brother was affected developmentally because of how wrong it all went.

WIBU to refuse an induction as long as they didn't have any immediate concerns? I'm absolutely terrified, and am scared I will need major surgery and will just be left at home on my own to cope a week after having a c section.

Really stuck and struggling with anxiety/fear. Does anyone have any rl experience of similar?

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Villainelle · 09/10/2018 13:33

I had an induction ending in a section. It was fine, I loved the birth. I would take a section any day over a vaginal birth, don't know why people are so terrified of them? I was on my own with my son 3 days after my section and had no problems. Just took my pain relief and it was grand. Better than having an arse full of tears and haemorrhoids IMO.

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CheNina · 09/10/2018 13:37

@Villainelle sadly I already have an arse full of haemorrhoids... Sad

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Violetglace · 09/10/2018 13:43

You can absolutely refuse an induction, it's a pain as they like to push for them, but not impossible if you stand your ground.

I completely understand your fears but just wanted to share a little of my experience - I had an emergency section after failed induction and while it obviously wasn't the most pleasant thing, recovery was a lot better than I anticipated. A week in I felt, while not 100%, certainly capable of looking after my son and walking around our flat. The drawback would be 6 weeks before you can drive so this could be an issue for you?

If it came to it, as long as you can prepare your home in advance (plenty of easy prep food, snacks, things you need on hand in each room) it would be doable. I would actually suggest doing the prep regardless of the type of birth you have, even just having a basket with snacks, nappy stuff and a bottle of water in your bedroom, living room etc makes all the difference.

Are you able to confide in your midwife and see what your options are? They may suggest a planned section which, although not ideal, might be simpler for you. Or you could get your midwife to help you put together a plan of care to avoid induction altogether?

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Hollywhiskey · 09/10/2018 13:43

I had an induction. When I was pregnant it was pretty much my greatest fear. I’d heard all the horror stories and I was terrified of the cascade of interventions that could follow.
I planned a home birth to avoid all that.
In the end I was induced due to reduced movements. I could have declined and gone in every day for monitoring but they couldn’t be sure of a good outcome if I did that. Of course that changed everything. There was a very kind consultant who sat with me and answered every question.
My birth was totally fine and I would happily do it again. I had a quick labour, no epidural (not to say there is anything wrong with it, just that it was one of the fears I had with the ‘cascade of interventions’) and despite having to be on continuous monitoring was encouraged to move around and be in whatever position I wanted.
I’ve got friends who describe their elective sections as ‘calm and beautiful’ too.
Good luck x

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Lauren83 · 09/10/2018 13:44

I also had a failed induction resulting in section and the experience and recovery was much better than what I expected. I was induced early due to babies size but despite 2 days of pessaries nothing was happening, they listed me for a section on day 3 but had to cancel around 8pm as there too many emergencies so I asked could I go home overnight as had been gowned up for theatre since 7am so they gave me a drip to rehydrate me as had been nil by mouth for theatre since the night before, went home had a good sleep and went back in on day 4 and had the section around 2pm, was up and about by 9pm and kept pottering around during the night to keep moving, was discharged just after lunch the next day. What made me choose the induction over the section in the first place was the recovery but it was a breeze compared to what I expected

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CountessVonBoobs · 09/10/2018 13:46

Is it your first?

I had an induction and it was absolutely fine. You can have an epidural sited at the same time as the induction drip if required. If you've given birth before an induction is highly likely to result in a vaginal birth. I much preferred induction to section and was back on my feet as soon as the epidural wore off.

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GreenLantern53 · 09/10/2018 13:46

I had an emcs lone parent to 4 kids. I had no partner and no family help. it wasnt that bad tbh. you will cope if worse comes to worse.

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CheNina · 09/10/2018 13:50

It's my first yes. I just know I'm going to panic as I have uncontrollable panic attacks. I have a real fear of medical interventions and haven't dealt with this throughout and now feel it's a bit too late to get any sort of help.

Just really desperate to have a natural birth and go in to labour naturally for a number of reasons but am realising that's totally unrealistic...

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bellsbuss · 09/10/2018 13:51

I've had 2 inductions and apart from the contractions being more intense than my other 2 labours I had no problems. Pregnancy 3 induction took 6 hours and number 4 7 hours.

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CheNina · 09/10/2018 13:53

It's also in my birth plan not to have an epidural. Absolutely don't want one. Just any sort of medical intervention terrifies me. I feel like a broken person as I suffer from so many health phobias. No idea how to overcome it before baby arrives.

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CountessVonBoobs · 09/10/2018 13:55

I do understand how you feel OP. I was induced for the same reason and really wasn't keen, although I don't have anxiety. But my talk with the senior consultant made it clear to me that waiting to go into labour significantly increases the risk of stillbirth. They are worried that the flow of blood and nutrients in the cord might reverse altogether or the placenta might completely fail.

You can decline the induction but you need to understand the risk you would be taking by doing that. Can you speak to your midwife - there are often midwives specifically to support vulnerable women. It's very likely the process wouldn't be as bad as you think, and you could discuss a threshold for moving to CS instead maybe?

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ree348 · 09/10/2018 13:57

I had an induction too as I was overdue by 2 weeks but ended up in a emergency c section because baby's head wasn't in the right position for me to push her out.

I'm not going to lie the first few days are hard but when the stitches come out you get a lot of relief. I was on my feet as soon as the epidural wore off and was caring for my baby.

Somehow you just get through it, I mean you have too!

Just keep taking your pain relief if it ends up being a c section and get big underwear (a few sizes too big) that will cover your belly and the scar. It will prevent any chafing and keep the scar covered too while it heals.

It's honestly not that bad, as long as the baby comes out healthy and mum is well that's all that matters.

Good luck!

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purpleface · 09/10/2018 13:59

Of course YANBU to be scared, and I would advise you to explain and ask about reasons, options, contingencies, etc. They should be able to discuss options and reassure you, it is part of the job.

FWIW I had induction at 38 weeks. I hadn't wanted it and did query if it was really necessary and couldn't we wait and see. The consultant v. gently explained why they felt it was safest and recommended in my case but 100% my decision, and I agreed. Had epidural in case of later problems (my choice). Whole thing was fine, no complications, no pain, very relaxed.

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tenbob · 09/10/2018 14:00

I had an elected c section after a high risk pregnancy and lots of monitoring, and my recovery was great

I was home after 24 hours, out walking (using the pram as a Zimmer frame) after 4 days, driving after 2 weeks and running after 8 weeks
My recovery is as easier than several of my NCT group who had Instrumental deliveries and I'd have another one in a heartbeat

You have a spinal rather than epidural but it was really straightforward, and I'm terrified of needles

The whole experience was so calm and serene, and the midwives both in theatre and on the post natal Ward were amazing

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Pollypanda · 09/10/2018 14:03

I refused an induction and opted for a section instead. I have no regrets. I was home within 2 days, walking round the block on day 5 and really back to my old self very soon. Just take it easy, take your painkillers and you’ll be fine. Remember newborns don’t need to “do” anything so you can afford to have a few weeks at home on the sofa.

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Smallplant · 09/10/2018 14:03

I had a failed induction and emergency c section. Obviously not what any woman would choose, but was totally fine and I look back on the experience positively.

I didn't want an epidural either, but ended up having one with the drip induction. These days you can control the administration of the epidural yourself with a button press, so I chose to not administer any for a few hours so I could feel the contractions, stay mobile and avoid a catheter for a while. You're not just instantly immobile if you don't want to be.

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holycityzoo · 09/10/2018 14:07

I've had four births two "natural" and two inductions.
I actually preferred the inductions.
I had a midwife with me continuously throughout labour and it was a fantastic experience. My pain was kept on top of and they were more than happy to give me exactly what I wanted. Which wasnt always the case during my natural labours.
I had epidurals but they are nothing like old epidurals now. I could feel every contraction they just didn't hurt. I didn't have any problems with pushing them out and one of them was 10lb 8.
Giving birth when you've not done it before is scary but I felt much more cared for and looked after during my inductions.
I was signed up for for a third induction and was quite happy about it until ds decided to make is own way out the day before.
Which ever way it happens hopefully very soon you will be holding your beautiful babySmile

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CheNina · 09/10/2018 14:13

I still don't know if I'm okay to still go to the MLU instead of the hospital if baby's growth picks up. How do I know if the MLU will accept me on the day or not if they allow me to go full term?

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Claireshh · 09/10/2018 14:40

I have two children. My first I was induced and due to my daughter not coping I had an emergency section. It was called an emergency but it was actually lovely. They were quick but no panic stations. I felt pretty good by the time I left hospital (after two nights). Second time so I had a planned section. It was seriously so so lovely. Calm, relaxed and gorgeous skin to skin afterwards. Medical intervention doesn’t mean it has to be negative. Could you speak to your midwife and consultant about your concerns? Oh, I was also feeling pretty good after a week too. If you rest you recover SO much faster. I had twinges after a week but nothing needing pain killers. In lots of ways my personal recovery from c sections was less troublesome than some friends natural births. It really will be ok. Xxx

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Iwantaunicorn · 09/10/2018 14:55

I had the choice of being induced or an elcs with my DTs, and chose the section. We spent 2 days in hospital afterwards (babies were a bit premature and were kept in for monitoring) then dh had a week off then I was on my own when he went back to work - no extra help.

I have ocd, and one of the things for me was anything and everything medical. By going for the section, everything was explained, I was constantly reassured, nothing happened to me without checking I was ok, and it was an absolutely wonderful experience, very calm and I felt in control throughout. Recovery was good, and I was back to driving within 2 weeks.

I had a horrendous pregnancy towards the end, and found it easier having two newborns than being pregnant, which probably doesn’t help really. Good luck with whichever way you decide to go 💐

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MTBMummy · 09/10/2018 14:55

You are well within your rights to refuse an induction, I did with DS (second birth) and said I would go full term naturally, but if he went hideously over as his sister did, I would go straight for a section. I had to push a bit for this, but they did agree. I went to 14 days over and then had my section on day 14, they did offer me an induction just before wheeling me off to the surgery and DP's comments was it was a good thing they had already started sedating me at that point as I probably would have killed them.

Post c-section was absolutely fine, just keep on top of your pain meds and don't do ANY heavy lifting.

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CheNina · 09/10/2018 15:06

Thanks @Iwantaunicorn - I also suffer from OCD so sympathise with that. It's debilitating at times, and part of the reason I don't want interventions. It's a mental health disorder and I feel like medical staff just think I'm a nuisance.

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HP07 · 09/10/2018 15:16

I’ve had both a successful induction first time around due to baby going overdue and a failed induction followed by a c section second time round due to premature rupture of membranes and baby becoming distressed during contractions. Over all I preferred the vaginal delivery even though the labour was very intense due to the syntocin drip but both were manageable. I was discharged the day after my vaginal delivery and 3 days after my c section (and baby was 4w 1d prem too). If the c section had been my first baby I think I would have been able to manage ok by myself within a week as babies are light and only need feeding and sleep almost all the time. Because I also had a toddler to look after t was a bit harder. My husband had 2 weeks paternity leave but we lost 5 days of that in hospital. I had some friends pop over for company and to help me entertain my toddler but I was largely on my own after my husband went back to work. It’s manageable. If it’s your first baby though I can see why you are nervous. It’s a whole new experience to get to grips with let alone recovering from major surgery or a traumatic delivery. Good luck. Hope it all goes well.

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sayanythingelse · 09/10/2018 15:17

I was induced for similar reasons. Although I'd prefer not being confined to a bed and hooked up to a drip, it was a very successful labour. Started the drip at 11am, DD was born at 7pm. No intervention required.

They're suggesting induction because they think there might be some risk to your baby. Whats worse - a csection or something awful potentially happening if the placenta/cord stops functioning? Childbirth is scary - especially when it's your first but it's not worth dwelling on what might happen in labour - it goes how it goes.

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Iwantaunicorn · 09/10/2018 20:28

@CheNina I really do sympathise, it’s horrible to live with isn’t it? I’m sorry you feel like the medical staff think you’re a nuisance.

It may or not help, but a couple of things I did whilst pregnant was listen to an anxiety hypnotherapy thing on YouTube. One of them makes you think of a happy place by a river which I practiced, and whilst my spinal was being done that’s what I focused my mind on. The team really understood my fears, and we spoke about it beforehand, so the anaesthetist checked multiple times that I was actually numb before asking if I was ok to start, and giving the go ahead to start to everyone else. I also found it helpful to read positive stories only to try to get it in my head that it happens to plenty of women and everything was ok. My thinking was if anything bad happened I’d deal with it on the day, rather than have my mind screaming at me and torturing me weeks/months in advance.

I really hope you get the labour and birth you want. I do sometimes feel wistful and wish I’d had a natural birth but know in my heart of hearts I made the best choice for the three of us.

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