AIBU threads and the real world- curious

[karmap]

I've read a few posts tonight that describe situations that are incredibly specific and complex. Even if the people directly mentioned don't read the post surely someone they know will share the content with them. I'm curious if posters assume this board has low traffic or they just don't mind people (in RL) knowing that they are on here venting. I'm not judging, surely it's quite common for people to be "outed"/recognised even if you change a few details.

I’ve thoight that too. I realise people NC, but yes, some detail is very specific that it would be easy to realise in RL if you knew the person. I don’t know how else people can get around it though, as they need advice, we need details to help. It may just be one of those things.

MN has millions of visitors daily.
Over the years though citing you're worried about the fact you've spewed every detail about yourself to those millions has become an easy way to get your thread deleted by HQ if you don't like the answers.
I have been on MN for 15 yrs and nobody irl has recognised me here yet.
People writing on mammy forums aren't really that interesting.
Although a disproportionate number of lots-of-personal-detail threads turn out to be trolls, so the detail can be quite a useful pointer. Especially the real time updating.

People writing on mammy forums aren't really that interesting

AIBU has some of the most interesting people in the world

Agree with BookMe

The difference between 'change a few details to protect privacy' and 'total pile of invented bollocks' is all too often not observed

I was thinking the same thing last night. Some of the scenarios are SO detailed and specific that people must think they could be found out from it? Part of the reason I am wary about posting anything too specific

Very few and far between are that specific.

The number of people who have been "outed" on MN in all these years can be counted on 2 hands, and yes, most of those have been because the OP has had their 15 minutes of glory in the redtops for posting (probably made up) bollocks about their sex life or "cheeky fuckery" committed by their (probably invented) next door neighbours.

I can think of 2 Mumsnetters who have been properly outed. And both of those were outed not due to anything they posted about themselves, but because of their uncomfortable (with some) opinions.

Anyone who thinks what they post about their husband's dick or their drive being blocked by the NDN is remotely outing-worthy needs to get some hobbies and a more balanced view of their own importance on a very very big forum tbh.

The number of people who have been "outed" on MN in all these years can be counted on 2 hands

Really? I would imagine it's far more.

I recognised a friend on here when she posted a thread about me. I text her and we both name changed so all anonymous again!

Whomp! I’ve always worried about that happening. What was her thread about, was she being specifically mean about you? How did you get past that?!

She posted on aibu about a debate we'd had that day. Really specific and the response was fairly split so I text her joking about how even mumsnet couldn't settle it and we'd both have to name change. No drama Just funny.

Well, you do get used to spotting the OP of such threads coming on pretending to be the person being talked about. That kind of muddies the stats a bit, but it's usually crystal clear that the person who's spotted themselves being talked about is actually the OP ramping up the bollocks. That happens far more often than the situation described by whomp.

It won't happen to you though, karmap, as you're a namechanger yourself (like I change mine once a month or so) so it's all good.

I think the turnover of posts is so high that the likelihood of a person recognising someone unless their post becomes huge is low

I recognised someone I knew on here. It was easy to work out as none of the details of the ‘situation’ had been changed. It wasn’t anything ‘super serious’, however I doubt the person they were talking about would have been too pleased to know they were being talked about in such a way.

Their next thread, I recognised just from the title. I told my partner ‘I bet this is X again’, and it was! I never told them I saw their threads, and think they’ve name changed since.

Is it good form to let someone know irl if you recognise them on here then?

I agree the danger of outing from MN itself is low. What's more worrying is the ongoing harvesting of stories by the Daily Fail. Very highly likely to be recognised if your AIBU is put on there.

What's more worrying is the ongoing harvesting of stories by the Daily Fail. Very highly likely to be recognised if your AIBU is put on there.

Journos nicking stories are a problem. However, so is said journos starting the stories on these forums to later publish them in their shit rags. That’s not to say they don’t lift ‘real’ stories either, but many times I’ve read a thread by a first time poster or ‘name changer’ and thought ‘well this will unsurprisingly end up elsewhere’. Nothing to recognise if it’s made up.

Boptopus I think it depends on the context. Not sure I could if the poster was pouring their hearts out (affair etc).

name changing isn't supposed to stop you being recognised full stop; it's to stop someone recognising you and then going through all your other posts and finding out lots of other unrelated things about you that you'd rather weren't linked back to you. Presumably people NC-ing and posting specific details don't really care if they are outed by that particular post.

AnastasiaaBeaverhousen

I was thinking in regards to post which contain quite specific (possibly outing) details and where people really let go off on someone