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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Do you take your kids to a parents night

21 replies

Fatasfook · 08/10/2018 22:41

Just that really. Primary aged children. Would you take them with you for your parent teacher consultation?

OP posts:
eelbecomingforyou · 08/10/2018 22:43

Depends what the school says. Some want you to, some don’t. Early primary? I wouldn’t. Tends to be year 5 and up, they like you to take the dc because they need to know what they’re doing right and wrong.

RedCabbageHowMuch · 08/10/2018 22:43

Nope, it's my time to talk to the teachers without little ears. If childcare was an issue DH would stay with DC and I would go and report back.

arethereanyleftatall · 08/10/2018 22:45

At our school it's the norm. I guess it might be different at others. Our parents evening is in the school hall, the teachers desks are about 10m away from the 'waiting area.' Just the parent goes to talk to the teacher, the kids stay in the waiting area, reading or colouring or playing in their iPads or whatever.

MissusGeneHunt · 08/10/2018 22:45

Depended on the teacher tbh. If I thought they were fair and reasonable I would take DS and receive the rough with the smooth, same message to us all. If it was that Judgey Bitch from year 5 (many moons ago, but can you hear I'm still bitter?!), then no, as I couldn't trust myself to be polite in front of DS.

She got off lightly.... 🤐😡

arethereanyleftatall · 08/10/2018 22:46

Having read the other responses, to clarify mine, we take ours with us so don't need childcare, but don't take them right up to the desk, so they can't hear but are in the room.

HollySwift · 08/10/2018 22:49

Younger two - yes, it’s expected. It starts at 3.30 and finishes at 6.30. I’d be hard pushed not to take them given that DH often isn’t home until 6.10!
School have toys out and the kids sit and play in the middle whilst you talk to the teacher. Parents watch each other’s precious moppets where appropriate.

Older ones - no. Their parents evenings are actually evenings so no need.

dementedpixie · 08/10/2018 22:52

Our primary school discouraged children being there. Secondary school tends to want them there

SparklyLeprechaun · 08/10/2018 22:52

It's expected at our school.

Lasvegas · 08/10/2018 22:55

From year 2 onwards took my DD up to the desk. She needs the feedback first hand surely. I approached it like a work appraisal.

HarperIsBazaar · 08/10/2018 22:55

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

notangelinajolie · 08/10/2018 23:00

Yes, we took the children with us. Lots of parents did but they weren't allowed into the classroom for the actual meeting with teacher. School age DC's had to sit outside the room and wait.

OutPinked · 08/10/2018 23:02

I don’t have childcare at the time parents evening runs unless DP takes time off work which I’m reluctant to have him do for the sake of 15 minutes of parents evening. It’s fine taking the DC with, it’s hardly like primary school teachers are tearing into them.

Deliqueen · 08/10/2018 23:04

At our school (juniors) it is made very clear that the children are expected to be with you for the whole meeting. Works very well tbh.

JulietteGrimm · 08/10/2018 23:09

(As a teacher) I like having the kids there. The ones who behave well love hearing the praise and the ones who struggle to behave appropriately benefit from seeing that parents and teachers are on the same page.

That said, nothing at parents evening is a surprise. If I have real concerns I contact parents and don't wait for parents evenings.

user789653241 · 08/10/2018 23:12

We do. School is ok with either, but most people seems to take children with them.

Lindy2 · 08/10/2018 23:15

We are supposed to take ours. Infind itvrather ridiculous. The children are supposed to show you a special piece of work they have done. Very nice but we only get 10 minutes and I don't want 5 of those spent on a conversation with my child that I can do at home. I want to hear what the teacher actually has to say.
I generally take my children but luckily they are old enough now for me to explain to them that I need to speak to the teacher and they can show me their work later.

cucumbergin · 08/10/2018 23:18

Normal for parents to take kids in our school so it's set up for it. We usually park DS on a bench with a tablet within sightline but usually not close enough to hear. By the time we come back he's usually sharing the tablet with a couple of friends and doesn't want to leave!

Would have missed several if kids were banned as we have no childcare and taking annual leave for 15 mins isn't really sensible when we have all the holidays to cover. It makes sense for both of us to go - DP and I often have different questions.

garethsouthgatesmrs · 08/10/2018 23:57

i think it must be different in different schools. The kids dont come to ours. Why not ask the teacher in advance.

If it's for childcare reasons just take them, the teacher will speak appropriately so no reason not to.

Shadow1234 · 09/10/2018 00:00

Our school always preferred us to bring our child.

I think it probably does depend on the school, so maybe ask them in advance .

seventhgonickname · 09/10/2018 00:03

I primary the school didn't mind but did always wanted to show us her work so we viewed that before seeing the teacher.Sometimes she got bored and went off to play with her friends but as said above there should be no surprises.

Original poster
Fatasfook · 09/10/2018 09:14

Il ask what they expect- thanks for replies

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