To cook something DH doesn't like?

[CrohnicallyEarly]

We had sausage casserole. He likes all the individual ingredients, and indeed asked for sausage, mash, veg and gravy for tea a couple of weeks ago, but doesn't like things cooked in gravy.

So I put some sausages and veg to one side for DH and cooked them separately. I also cooked jacket potatoes to have on the side instead of mash as it's easier. And of course there was gravy from the casserole.

When it came time to serve up, DH turned his nose up at what I'd cooked. Instead he ate the sausages on their own and then had his spuds with various toppings. At least he sorted himself out, but that meant food was wasted, we're on a budget and he added stuff to his spuds that was earmarked for other meals.

Aibu to be annoyed he was rude about what I cooked, even though I thought I'd catered for his dislike, and also that he essentially had 2 meals?

I don't think he did anything wrong apart from too much tuna, which was a bit greedy. The thought of my food intake being monitored like this makes me feel rather depressed. You say you're not on that tight a budget so why make such a fuss? It's lovely that you cook for him and I hope that usually he's suitable grateful but I wouldn't want to have a boring plain meal just to please my OH, because I didn't like the alternative. I would jazz it up a bit too.

Poncy chefs make mash from the middle of jackets do you're in good company, assuming butter was available!

Two tins of tuna definitely excessive for one person!

Some people here are very weird - the potato from of a jacket potato makes the best mash as it’s not at all waterlogged. Nothing wrong with sausages and jacket potatoes (for some reason I’d find gravy on a jacket spud a bit weird but now I think about it, it could be great!)

What’s with all the comments about sausage and jacket potato together?! Team that with baked beans and some grated cheese on the potato and it’s a match made in heaven! Especially on bonfire night 😊

TWO tins of tuna, along with his sausages? Greedy indeed.

I really fancy a JP with lots of butter and a couple of sausages in the side, now.

I like sausage casserole, too. I do haricot beans in ours. But do put some wine in so less budgetty.

I don't care what I eat (within reason) if someone else is cooking, I'm just happy I don't have to cook! Tell him to cook for himself if he doesn't like it.

He was selfish and out of order. We often eat things here we are not keen on to keep to budget or because someone else enjoys it.

I think you made quite a lot of effort to accommodate his fussiness pretences. And a jacket potato with sausage is weird but you’re right about it becoming mash very easily- a lot of restaurants do it this way. He was very rude though and if this is a regular occurrence it up I’d be tempted to stop cooking for him altogether.

Pretences?! That should be preferences!

I'm confused, you say the sausages are not good enough to eat on their own (I agree cheap sausages can be awful) so you put them in a casserole... But cooked them for your husband on their own? No wonder he turned his nose up 😂

What's wrong with sausages and baked potato?? Add baked beans or Heinz Five Beans and grated cheese and you have a great meal. We've been together 40 years and it's the only meal to survive - we just have much better sausages now!

lichtie I could understand if he hadn't wanted the sausages, but he ate them without even any gravy on!

abbie that's my thinking, there's lots of meals I'm not that bothered about but I cook them because I know my husband and children like them. if I avoided all the meals that one of us isn't all that keen on, we'd eat the same 3 meals on rotation!

To be honest I probably would not have cooked for him but left the sausages raw, potatoes raw, etc.

Just curious though, is your sausage casserole cooked in gravy? If it is I would love the recipe.

I cook things dh doesn't like and ignore any comments, though he rarely says a word as he knows which side his bread is buttered - he doesn't cook ever, not even breakfast! (He is quite willing to take me to nice restaurants or order Deliveroo whenever I don't want to cook so not complaining).

Seems this guy is totally unreasonable, who has two tins of tuna on a jacket spud, half is plenty! I remember money being that tight and it drove me crazy when he ate things earmarked for other use - now I shop almost daily, it avoids such problems

Imo, you don't get enough mashable potato from a jacket. My idea of sausage and mash involves a lot more mash - and brown sauce. Have you tried micro-wave mash? It takes 5 mins and is a lot less hassle than peeling and boiling and mashing potatoes in a saucepan. You can tweak to your taste with seasoning and butter.

Lets be honest, this isn't about him being rude. Its about him eating food that the op thinks they can't afford. If he was hungry then he was completely reasonable to eat as much food as he needed. If they cant afford it then they need to have a conversation about reducing their calorie intake, losing weight and saving some money.

I'm with you OP. My DH is a fussy eater, and the things he doesn't like (potato and rice) are the cheap ingredients that help to bulk out a meal! He doesn't get my mindset of wanting to budget on meals so I can spend on pretty things instead . Luckily for me though he does his fair share in the kitchen so I don't have stress about it too often.

Secondly you are being pretty unreasonable to cook a meal you know he doesn't like That's rather dependent on how many meals he doesn't like. If he doesn't like casseroles, stews, anything with gravy or sauce, that's already quite limiting.

I don't have an opinion on the AIBU, but I just wanted to defend sausage and JP as a meal - it's a regular "lazy" dinner for us, as you can stick the sausages in the oven too, then serve with baked beans. I don't think it's a weird combination in the least!

I’m with you OP. YANBU.

You went to quite a lot of effort to cater to his fussy preferences and he was in turn

• rude, saying “ugh” when you told him what you cooked
• picky, he didn’t eat the vegetables you cooked, modelling some bad behaviour for the kids
• greedy, making a massive topping that could have been a second meal
• acting like he’s too good to eat the provided meal

I think a lot of other commenters are thinking about what they like to eat when they say they wouldn’t like the meal. For some reason they’re not imagining that they’ve put thought and effort into a meal for their partner which they disassembled and supplemented with a second meal.

He sounds ungrateful and annoying. And greedy.

I'm with you too OP!

I do all the cooking for myself, DP and two toddler DC. Last week he had a massive strop because he got home late from work and his dinner had dried out a bit. This escalated into him throwing a tantrum effectively saying that if I can't cook his dinner fresh, to order, to be ready when he gets home so he can eat straight away regardless of what else is going on (bathtime, bedtime etc) - then don't bother. He doesn't want frozen food or anything that needs to be reheated.

He was a royal PITA to cook for anyway and I have two toddlers under my feet all the time who have separate food. He wanted specific foods too and never thanked me once for shopping, cooking etc.

I have taken him at his word and not cooked him a dinner since. It's been glorious