What would you do re 2nd baby

[thedocisin]

Tell me your positive and negative stories re conceiving child number 2.
DH and I are 35, one DD age 2.3. Ideally I would want to wait until DD is 3 to start trying as I want to be on mat leave when she starts reception so I can drop her to school every day pick her up etc. Also wanted her to be a bit more mature so she can deal with the new arrival a bit better. On the other hand i'm worried that TTC won't be very easy. Reading a lot of stories about secondary infertility and scaring myself a bit. Took us 6 months to conceive DD1 - conceived every month but each time resulted in a chemical pg until i started taking aspirin. Had an EMCS and subsequent haematoma which i've heard can cause secondary infertility. Also about two stone heavier than when I conceived DD1 and now over 35 which is when they say fertility drops off a cliff. So just wondering whether to take the chance and start trying now (but if successful it would be a much smaller age gap than i'd like) OR wait until the right age gap but obviously risking secondary infertility issues which may mean not conceiving at all or a mahoosive age gap. What did you do? what age gap do you have and any problems TTC number 2?

I had a chemical pregnancy both just before my first and my second successful pregnancies. We started TTC #2 when DC1 was 11 months old. That was a chemical/very early miscarriage, and I fell pregnant again on the back of it with no periods in between. It was twins. There's a 20 month age gap. Looking back I ask myself why the rush?! Obviously it would have been fine with 1 baby. Bit tricky with 3 under 2 but we're 6 months in and we're alive. I was 35 and 37 when I gave birth, for context.

Good luck OP! I 100% agree with whoever said you just get what you get and make it work. FWIW I think smaller age gaps are harder to start with but then get easier, while bigger age gaps are the other way round. 4 years between my 1 and 2 and 20 months between 2 and 3. I had MCs before 1 and before 2 - hence big gap - so we went for 3 straight away, thinking it would take a couple of misses - hence little gap! Best laid plans and all that. There are pros and cons to any age gap, but you’ll love the second just as much, regardless of when they turn up. Hope all works out for you

With DS1 I conceived first time and DS2 took 1.5 years with a mc in between. Do it now! X