To complain about my sister asking my parents for money?

[Pdubs84]

My parents turned up for their once every 6 weeks visit to see our 2.5 old and 8 month old daughters. 30mins in and my sister was on the phone to my mum asking to borrow £10 to pay for an Uber because they were late to a wedding!! My sister is younger, but late 20s none the less and her partner is in his 40s. My sister is often asking for money for rent etc, I don’t care much and stay out of it, but this was beyond the pale. I mentioned casually to my sister that surely it was okay to be late and borrowing £10 was a bit over the top. She said I didn’t understand as I’d married a rich husband and didn’t have to work. For context my husband is earning around 50k at the moment, I’m a trained teacher but with child care costs it’s easier for me to stay home whilst the kids are so young. I feel like people think I’m a loser for not working so this touched a nerve, but I can’t help thinking my sister is behaving atrociously and someone needs to have a word for my parents sake!

Don't blame you for finding it OTT. However I wouldn't say anything - likely as not you'll only be labelled the bad guy and v likely they won't listen anyway.

IMO parents who are constantly bailing out adult dcs don't do them any favours - dd has a friend who always earned enough but had still not learned to manage money in her late 30s - still relying on parents to pay cc debt etc. I think it's not uncommon.

You can tell your parents if they do it - that they are doing her no favours and are enabling her to expect more and more. I have a close family member (in their 30's) who still sponges off their parents - and we're talking hugely more than the odd tenner! How about a £70K handout towards a property purchase to the detriment of the other siblings causing resentment and fallout?

I have three Adult DD's. One has children. I make it clear to the other two that what I do with my money is my business, likewise what they do with theirs is their business.

Would you open up all of your spending to your Parents to scrutinise and criticise? Both my DD's without children spend money on food/coffee/drinks out, that I never have, oh and taxi's.

Are you sure that she isn't being controlled/financially abused, or have power plays done with her? That was what was happening with my DD at one point, but I was making sure that he couldn't win.

""You can tell your parents if they do it - that they are doing her no favours and are enabling her to expect more and more.""

They are old enough to not need telling anything.

I told my DH and any Partners that I've had, that I Parent in the way that I choose, even to Adults.

Why do you get to decide how you Parent/spend your money until your children become Adults and then it is up to everyone else?

Her partner is in his 40s and she's still asking her parents for a tenner? Sounds like they both need to grow up but also your parents need to stop saying yes.

you sound a petty and jealous 12 yearold .Absolutely noyb!!