Breastfeeding rates in the UK

[Faerie87]

It’s just that really, been reading up a lot on this recently and the statics show that our rates are not as good as other countries, so what is it that other countries do differently?

I currently feed my LG a combination of breast milk and formula, I express for her, unfortunately I was never able to get her to latch properly but would have loved to have been able to feed her directly. I know this can be quite an emotive subject so I thought I would share my experience to show I’m not in one camp or the other regarding this, I’m just curious to find out what is the general consensus on why the Uk does have low breast feeding rates?

I think it’s nice to share experiences of feeding baby’s whether it be formula feeding or breast feeding, and for those ladies who have tried to breast feed but not continued what made you stop? And if you were to have another baby would you do anything differently?

@bibijayne well done for persevering! I just wanted to say though that your post shows some of the real problems with the lack of knowledge around breastfeeding. Nobody’s milk comes in before day 3! What you’ve described re the small syringes of colostrum is totally and absolutely normal, expected, and perfectly sufficient for a full term baby in the first few days of life (appreciate you had a preemie and maybe formula supplementation is needed in those cases?). Anyone who led you to expect you should have had milk sooner though was seriously ill-informed and I find it hard to believe this included a lactation specialist when the quickest google search of “when does milk come in” confirms it’s 3-4 days after birth. I’m sorry you didn’t have better care and well done for getting through it!

There are some people who never want/intend to bf and that’s fine. But for those who start and give up quickly I agree with pps that there is a real knowledge gap among professionals and people in general about what is normal - pain, when milk comes in, cluster feeding and what is needed properly to establish bf which is basically having the mother devote herself to pretty much nothing else for the early weeks. My DH had to do absolutely everything in the house and at 6 months I still haven’t “got my life back”. This coupled with a minimising of the benefits of bf in an effort to avoid offending those who ff means that many think it isn’t worth it.

Pregnancy is also something that can only be done by a woman, it’s physically hard (more so for some than others) and it limits what you can do for a defined period. If bf was seen as the natural completion of the gestation process and the default thing then rates would be higher, but instead women are encouraged to almost pretend they haven’t had a baby and go back to normal as soon as they can.

Some really good posts on here.

I wish I’d known that before I got pregnant I was actually signing up for potentially two years or more of having to watch what I ate and drank! Not that it would have put me off, but at least I’d have been prepared. I long for the days when I could reach for a lemsip or antihistamines willy nilly !

I’ve already said this, so sorry for repeating, but I mix fed dc1 for about 3 months before switching to formula. I now EP for my 8mo dc2 and I swear I found formula feeding harder. I know lots of people get on brilliantly with ff and get right into a routine etc, but I found it a total ball ache. EPing is a pain because I HAVE to pump two or three times a day, or my boobs would go mad, which is annoying. But the milk lasts longer, so I throw less away and I don’t have to make up bottles as it’s already a complete feed.

I know it’s just luck that I’ve been able to do this as my baby is quite easy going and lets me pump. I also have amazing support from dh and good milk supply.

But I wish someone had told me what a pain ff would become.

Obviously, there genuinely is no choice for lots of mothers and babies. It’s either formula or starve your baby! That was the state of things for me with dc1 as we were both seriously ill. She needed a feeding tube, so definitely couldn’t breastfeed. The day I fell ill I was pumping for her and despite having had a decent supply beforehand, not one drop came out because I was ill. The mw said it was my body starting to shut down ‘unnecessary’ things.

But anyway, my point is that I think ff is sometimes touted as the easy option, when it really isn’t always.

Agree with you on pretty much everything, harrietm. I've heard so many people say the 'my milk didn't come in fast enough' thing - my MIL told me that she was still sad that she couldn't breastfeed DH, but her milk didn't come in for four days so obviously she knew that meant she wasn't going to make enough for a baby (I didn't correct her, it seemed cruel to do it 35 years too late). Interestingly, even my mum - who breastfeed us both and is a big breastfeeding advocate - told me that the reason you let babies suck a lot during the first few days before milk comes in is that 'it helps your body get rid of the rubbish that is already in there so that the proper milk comes', so I think the benefits of colostrum must not have been as widely known when she had her children as she seemed to think it was essentially a waste product.

I wish I’d known that before I got pregnant I was actually signing up for potentially two years or more of having to watch what I ate and drank! Not that it would have put me off, but at least I’d have been prepared. I long for the days when I could reach for a lemsip or antihistamines willy nilly wink!

This is something where I think there should be much more advice because I think with both drugs and food people are avoiding things unnecessarily some of the time, which makes breastfeeding seem more restrictive than it has to be. I only discovered the other day that most of the other breastfeeding mums I know are avoiding spicy food because they're breastfeeding - I didn't even know that was a thing and DS seems to be fine on my curry milk! Some of them also avoid vegetables like broccoli 'because it makes the baby windy' which seems to be like it absolutely has to be an old wives tale. Similarly, the breastfeeding class at my local hospital was very clear that I can drink (they said if I was sober enough to look after a baby I was sober enough to breastfeed) but I've got so many 'ooh, can you do that?' comments when having a glass of wine or a beer. Obviously if your child has allergies it's very different, but I think women need to be given evidenced information about what to avoid because I think it's less than most people think.

I felt awful for my SIL who had a baby same time as me- her 4th, and the other 3 she’d had to give up BF through “not enough milk” which I had taken at face value.

It’s only when we had babies at the same time I realised how her decisions were affecting her supply and it wasn’t being properly established (she obviously didn’t know this)

My DB put a lot of pressure on saying he didn’t want to be woken in the night and the solution was a formula top up. Of course, as they do, the baby slept far longer on formula top up night than the few nights previously. So this became an example of how her BM wasn’t enough.
Then of course, she wasn’t feeding enough, because of the top ups.
She couldn’t pump ( as most can’t in the early days) which became more evidence of her lack of milk.

Then she got mastitis from not feeding enough. Rather than feed it out this became another example of how she just couldn’t do it. The mastitis turned serious and she was readmitted. The hospital staff kept asking why she hadn’t brought her baby back with her, to help feed it out but she didn’t want the baby around hospital germs. Of course, that was the end of a vey traumatic 4th BF journey. But if someone had just told her- all normal! You are good enough, your baby is getting enough. You are a superstar. All of that might’ve been prevented

I ate and drank everything whilst BF (including alcohol) but you can’t really take anti histimines or cold remedies

Oh yes, sorry, I wasn't saying those specific examples were wrong - it just prompted me to muse on the fact that I do think a lot of people (not the poster I was responding to) think breastfeeding restricts your diet.

Tongue tie - bet the rates would increase a little if the NHS did tongue tie separation in the wards. We had to wait weeks before we were able to get an appointment.

I've got 2 DS's under 2yrs old. One is 16mths and the other 8 weeks old.

Personally I feel BF is the norm and tend to see people doing this more than FF when out and about (I live in the NW of England).

With DS1 I tried to bf until he was 3.5mths. I say "tried" as his weight was dropping gradually further from the 0.4th centile so did end up doing formula top ups and eventually DS1 refused the breast in favour of the bottle. I guess he found it easier to feed from the bottle and his weight rocketed to the 75th centile. In the hospital after his birth I must say that the midwives, whilst trying to help, often have different advice re: how to hold him, how to get him to latch etc so you'd do what one said then the next one would come along and tell you something different which was very confusing in my sleep deprived state. We were in for 4 days due to initial feeding problems. I had loads of support locally once discharged, there are bf support groups almost daily where I live run by the NHS, I was seeing the HV weekly due to his poor weight and the GP fortnightly. No one can tell me why bf didn't work with him. 🤷🏻‍♀️

Due to this I have gone straight to ff with DS2. I feel more judged when ff tbh. No one has ever commented to me in public whilst either bf or ff so the judgement I feel when ff probably comes from my own guilt about not bf.

Oh I agree totally Lisa. I remember my dad asking me if I was sure it was ok to eat pate. WTF? Pate?!

I've heard so much contradictory advice on what not to eat while BF. I reckon if I had needed to go on a restrictive diet that would have been the thing that made me switch to FF

My GP was fine with me taking citirizine during the summer

www.nhs.uk/common-health-questions/medicines/can-i-take-hay-fever-medicine-if-i-am-breastfeeding/

I’m having think about what helped breastfeeding work for me, as I have breastfed four children beyond a year.

I educated myself a lot on problems. So looked at the things that could go wrong, and what might cause those. That meant I was able to get help quickly when it was hard. I think overly simplistic information (“its natural” etc) can obscure that fact that can be really tough to get established.

When I did need help I was fortunate enough to have a relative on DH’s side who is a lactation consultant. She was amazing. Too many women can’t easily access help when they need. Like a pp said it can be a bit of a postcard lottery.

I wasn’t breastfeed and though my parents and siblings were supported, I had some discouraging/unpleasant moments from extended family members (“95% of the population fondbwhat you are doing offensive”). BUT I was living in Africa when DC1 was born and breastfeeding was utterly normal. My neighbour would actually have a breast hanging out with a toddler running up and having a drink from time to time. That isn’t what I’d do but it was easier to gain confidence in a setting where it is normal. I think it’s hard for women who are surrounded by people who disapprove. By the time I went to the UK, she was older and I was more confident, so the nasty comments didn’t matter.

For me I just didn’t get the support. After a long 36 hour labour I struggled to get him to latch. Instead of being helped to find a position and encouraged to persevere, I was milked by hand by various midwives for 3 days who then took my baby off me and fed him from the syringe. I felt useless and despondent. Also it was about 40 degrees in there so my nipples were just flat. Tried opening the window to cool sown a bit and got told off. I really really wanted to breastfeed and it is one of my biggest regrets that I didn’t demand more help to do so.

It’s depends hersympthany- as far as I know, anti histamines aren’t harmful to baby. It’s just that they dry up all your mucus, so they can dry up your breast milk- they did with me

I did not know that if you expressed milk and gave it through a bottle you were not breastfeeding. This is crazy. I expressed milk to have enough supply, my son was not "eating" enough to have the milk flow coming. The milk stopped I had to express to make it come back and it did work : I successfully breastfed him for 24 months. I had a lot of support from one other mum who herself breastfed and was a nurse.
My daughter was breastfed up until 22 months, it was perfect. My body only had milk when I was with her, I could work, no problems. My last son only three months, I had to go back to work early, I did not express, it stopped at three months. I gave up because of work and the environment. I lost all the weight with the two first kids, not so with the last one. Expressing milk solves a lot of problems, the partner can give the bottle too. You can freeze the milk, you are protecting your child from obesity, you are loosing a tremendous amount of weight. And I am not against a bottle of cowsmilk either, when you are sick, you just have to. You cannot take a risk. But. You cannot breastfeed with stress, it cuts the supply. If we can manage a society with less stress for mum and actual real support, we can make it. I don't see a working mum successfully breastfeeding without expressing. I was premature, I survived thanks to the gift milk from my mum and many other mums. I would always mums to breastfeed, when you leave the door open, there are more people who will try it.

And yes to the tongue tie issue. My relative has seen lots of women whose babies have tongue toe but are struggling to get help from their HV. It’s so easy to fix.

If DC3 had been DC1, I wouldn’t have managed to continue. Awful latch, terrible and pain and bleeding nipples. But because I had breastfed two already I knew it was possible for me to feed without it being so horrendous. It took a while but it did get sorted.

Oh, and not one midwife suggested expressing so he was still getting breastmilk. It actually makes me angry now because I feel we were just left to it. In fact, once we said we were going to formula feed we did not have another midwife come in to see me. My OH after 6 hours of waiting went to chase up my notes so we could go home. And we were sent home without my son having his first health check which should have happened before we were discharged. It was only when the health visitor checked his book we saw it hadn’t been done.

My mum told me it would be really easy. She fed us and I think all my aunts did the same.
I found it very easy and the babies all thrived. I wonder whether that's because genetically my family finds it easy or because I had absolute trust in my mum's advice that it would be?

my MIL told me that she was still sad that she couldn't breastfeed DH, but her milk didn't come in for four days so obviously she knew that meant she wasn't going to make enough for a baby (I didn't correct her, it seemed cruel to do it 35 years too late)

I think this is part of the problem too. Like someone said upthread lots of bottle feeders seem to feel they had to justify to me,- bf, why it “didn’t work”.

I’d smile and nod and empathise, while thinking utter bollocks, if you’d had some good advice you’d have realised that a newborn bf 2 hourly was normal, cluster feeding did not mean a lack of milk, that you can bf a baby born over 10lbs, that a crying newborn isn’t starving, they just want to be held and to suck to stimulate milk supply.

As you say, it seems cruel to correct them. But then they go on to give this “advice” to other bf mums, and don’t realise their information is wrong for subsequent children. And the correct bf advice from bf is lost in favour of this reasoning...

I've wondered that too, can'tuse - how far bf/FF in families is purely cultural and how far it's because some families genuinely find it easier. My mum told me that too but I didn't really believe her - I'd read so many stories about how hard breastfeeding was by then, and in contrast to what many other people were told my NHS antenatal breastfeeding class basically said it would be hard and hurt for six weeks but then get better - but it still turned out to be easy for me, so I think it wasn't just mum's positivity about it, it was just easier for me than for some/most people.

Ah glintandglide I thought that applied to decongestants (which I have avoided) rather than antihistamines. Fortunately supply has not been affected

I didn’t breast feed because I didn’t want too.

I didn’t breast feed because I didn’t want to

We need more people to stand up and say this.

Following on from my last post, If women felt able to simply say they didn’t want to, or it was too hard so they chose ff, they wouldn’t feel the need to justify why bf “failed” for them. And we’d lose many of the myths about why people can’t bf that i posted above.

Ffs one woman told me about how in the post natal ward their was a young mother desperately wanting to bf, whose baby cried every time she put him down. It sounded to me like she was doing great, and probably needed someone to tell her it was normal and to persevere, and maybe take the baby for a little walk to give her a break.

But this woman took great delight in telling me how she’d “helped” by going over and telling her the baby was “clearly starving” and she should give the baby formula to stop the crying. As that is what happened with her previous child.

Same woman also told me “everyone knows you can’t bf a 10lb baby”.

Lisa / can’tuse bf came easily to my mum too and I was fortunate that it wasn’t as hard to establish for me as I expected (aided by the massive family support in the early days)

I am finding it hard going now at nearly 5mo - not the feeding itself which is easy now, but the fact that he still feeds every 1-2 hours day and night. I know this is very normal but as he won’t take a bottle it is all on me and I am pretty sleep deprived and can’t be away from the baby for long . I had expected things to be easier at this stage and that expectation has not been met. I’m not going to stop EBF but I can see how this would put many women off if they knew this was a possibility in advance, and I can see how mixed feeding might be introduced to alleviate the pressure on the mother at this stage