To think people use MumsNet just to have a dig?!

[SPR1107]

As above, I feel like people try and be helpful and give opinions or answers to other people's questions/posts, and there's always somebody who has to have a go about someone's response, or be rude and belittling.

I was on here a few years ago and didn't notice it then, recently rejoined and it just seems full on angry, argumentative people.

Is there any need?

Isn't this exactly what you are doing here, OP?

Yep but you’re going to get told off by them now 😂😂😂

That's AIBU for you. People ask for opinions, and people get opinions.

There's always the report button if you feel the need.

@ChardonnaysPrettySister No I don't think it is what I'm doing, because it's generic. I'm not pointing out a person and basically saying 'your opinion is stupid'!

@TeddybearBaby yeah and I fully expect it 😂

@Sparklingbrook OP asks for opinions, which I completely get, but if someone gives an opinion on someone else's post, I just don't see the need for someone else to have a pop and someone for that particular opinion. The OP asks for the opinion, someone responding didn't ask for others to critique theirs

*At someone

It's just the same in RL

Yes but it turns into a discussion. Everyone has a point of view.

@Singlenotsingle the discussion thing I have no issue with, but I've seen people on here have a go at people's parenting styles when it's completely unrelated and uncalled for, seen name calling, and people being sworn at.
Maybe I'm naive, but I just wonder how many of the people that do this would do it face to face, or sit and think how it's making the person feel on the other side of the app.

Is this about a particular thread? I haven't noticed things being any different lately.

This particular nest of vipers has always been a bit poisonous - hence the nickname.

I want to say YABU but in your defence, I have found the same threads get completely different responses depending on which crowd you're 'pitching' to.

In my own personal experience, people seem more brutal on Friday and Sunday nights compared with Mondays during the work day (UK) when your thread is more likely to drop off the front page etc.

Also, quite often the first few responses can set the tone of the thread and people can get into the entire competitive insult thing so the original question can be lost.

It's easier said than done, but try not to focus on the particularly nasty responses and some people can give really good advice.

I do find the occasional poster rather aggressive, but I have taught myself to ignore and leave the thread, not to return, if anyone is aggressive to me. Also, I stop reading threads if anyone gets nasty.

Completely agree @extremelymaturecheese I have seen some great advice on here and some really kind comments. It's not everyone just a handful of things that I've seen.

None in particular @Sparklingbrook just some posts one come across, the comments have made me feel a bit uneasy. But perhaps I'm a little sensitive

Started to do the same @babswindsor. My initial reaction was to leave, but then actually I've found the site really helpful when I've needed it, and quite a good support network sometimes, so now I just take myself out if I'm not liking how the post is going

OP if every single poster agreed on every single thread can you imagine how boring it would be? Disagreement is good as is a debate. Obviously being cruel and nasty isn't on.

All for the differences of opinions @GreatDuckCookery, it's just the harshness of some people that puts me off

It’s the internet. MN is hardly bad compared to some forums / groups

Yanbu, but its best to assume they are either goady fuckers or trolls and ignore them. Carry on with the discussion as if they haven't said anything.

It must be less than a week since we had one of these threads.
If you see unkindness call it out on the thread or report it if you think it breaches the guidelines.

Yabu. It's also used for stealth boasting and making oneself feel superior by putting others down. i've cat proofed my garden, don't you know

Tbh I OP I am seeing a lot more in the way of kind and supportive posters in the main. Obviously there are some sharp ones thrown in but I think they are in the minority these days.

Or maybe it's just the threads I'm on?!

Sometimes people start goady threads though.

Now I have noticed the stealth boasting increasing. Actually it's not really stealth most of the time is it? Makes me laugh.

I agree, @GreatDuckCookery there have been some really great debates on here, which I've really enjoyed. Robust debate is good. It's a shame when they get derailed by troll hunters or turn into nothing more than a bun fight. But robust debate on AIBU is something I really enjoy.

This seems to be the latest incarnation if the 'you're all bitches' thread.

@SPR1107 we are all different and I don’t love a debate...... if I have something I think will be of value to the op I’ll reply if not I keep 🤐. I don’t really want to get involved with what others have to say, just tell the op my perspective. Maybe not of any use but they can dismiss it easily so that’s ok.

I will answer if someone challenges me but I never find myself getting wound up by anything on here tbh. Not yet anyway!