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AIBU?

To think vegetarian mums are selfish?

349 replies

lisabd345 · 02/10/2018 16:23

There's a woman on my Facebook who has a son 6 years old.
She's a vegetarian and she's made sure her son is too.
She's just posted that her son is suffering from iron deficiency and GP has said it's probably due to his diet and the fact he doesn't eat meat....and the GP has gave him medication to take every day and he is crying about it ..so she's asking what to feed him to bring iron levels up.
Aibu to think he should make a decision when he's older if he wants to be vegetarian and not have it forced upon him?

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PickAChew · 02/10/2018 16:27

YABU. It's possible to be vegetarian and eat well. It's also possible to be fully omnivorous and have a crap, nutrient deficient diet.

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Cheeseplantandpickle · 02/10/2018 16:27
Hmm
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lisabd345 · 02/10/2018 16:28

Surely if your child was getting ill because of a poor diet and the doctor has said this ..then you continue this ..it's a bit ridiculous

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PeppaP · 02/10/2018 16:28

Selfish maybe to not ensure he gets enough iron in his vegetarian diet but not selfish to bring him up veggie. If she is why wouldn’t she?

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RedHelenB · 02/10/2018 16:29

Leafy vegetables and a drink of orange juice to aid iron absorption. Looks like the mother needs to do more research into how to give her son a balanced diet. I can understand not wanting to handle meat though if you're veggie . At the end of the day though humans are designed to eat meat!

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MrsJayy · 02/10/2018 16:29

I don't think she is selfish at all her food preferences are probably ethical and there is nothing wrong with her dc following the diet her kids iron deficency won't be because he isn't chowing down on steak. My meat eating dc had to have a vitamin supplement as a young kid because she was a fussy eater

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Oopupsideyourhead · 02/10/2018 16:29

As a veggie of 30 years, I would question what she is feeding him as there is no reason to be iron deficient on a healthy veggie diet- I have never had an iron problem.

However, my kids both ate meat at school & my older DS who is 10 has just decided to be veggie. Younger DD eats meat still- I just don’t cook I at home.

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Veterinari · 02/10/2018 16:29

You mean selfish in the same way that meat eaters force their dietary preferences on children? Or dies that preference just count as ‘parenting’ because It’s a social norm in this country?

The problem is not the vegetarianism, it’s that his diet isn’t balanced - big issue for many omnivorous children too as lots of them don’t eat red meat.

He could be omnivorous eating chicken and fish and have the same problem. It’s easy to get iron in a vegetarian diet if it’s well-planned.

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NotUmbongoUnchained · 02/10/2018 16:29

Yes! I’m a vegetarian myself and wouldn’t dream of removing an entire food group from my children’s diet. I think it’s very selfish.

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AhoyDelBoy · 02/10/2018 16:29

Yawn.

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ladybee28 · 02/10/2018 16:30

Doctor doesn't always = right....

Shouldn't the child also have the right to decide when he's older if he wants to eat meat (and all the antibiotics and crap that gets pumped into meat) and not have THAT forced upon him?

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EbbandTheWanderingHearts · 02/10/2018 16:31

Slightly on the fence with this one. A well balanced vegetarian diet is perfectly fine for children but I do think it takes a little more planning to make sure all the nutritional bases are covered. I was brought up vegetarian and never had any issues. However, I have brought my own children up as meat eaters and they can make the choice if they choose. I don't mind cooking meat though but if the woman on FB does, I wouldn't judge her for that.

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Mumof1DS · 02/10/2018 16:31

YABVU in judging. Vegetarianism is perfectly able to give a balanced diet.
For all you know, she might be planning on giving him the choice when he's older.
DH and I are vegetarian. DC will be vegetarian until old enough to make the choice, but if they're being fed by us at home, they will be eating veggie food until they are old enough to cook meat or to assist in cooking it.

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Oopupsideyourhead · 02/10/2018 16:31

You could also add that if you feed your kids chicken nuggets & chips constantly then they would get iron deficient too. It’s nothing to do with being veggie

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FekkoTheLawyer · 02/10/2018 16:32

She's a twit to feed a child (let alone herself) without knowing about vitamins and minerals.

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YeTalkShiteHen · 02/10/2018 16:33

It’s not the fact she (or he) is vegetarian that is the issue, it’s the fact she’s not feeding him properly. That can (and does) happen with non vegetarians too!

She needs to research properly and make sure her child is getting all the vitamins and nutrients he needs from what she’s giving him. There’s absolutely no reason why a full, varied vegetarian diet can’t provide everything a growing child needs.

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notacooldad · 02/10/2018 16:33

Do you mean all vegetarian mums?
What about vegetarian dad's,?
What about veggies that manage to sort out a balanced diet.
What about parents that are vegetarian for religious reasons.
I think you have made a huge sweeping statement when your story us about one particular person.

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AssassinatedBeauty · 02/10/2018 16:34

YABU. And you are also being a bit dim to link one parent (does the child have a dad?!) who feeds their child an inadequate diet with all other vegetarian families.

Parents can feed their children an inadequate diet whilst being meat eaters, yet you wouldn't dream of suggesting that all meat eating parents are selfish as a result.

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VickieCherry · 02/10/2018 16:34

It's perfectly possible to be vegetarian and not iron deficient. She needs to feed him better, not necessarily feed him meat.

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DaniC18 · 02/10/2018 16:34

I agree with pp it's not the meat eating that's the issue it's the lack of nutritious diet. That being said I wouldn't impose being a vegetarian on my DC my OH eats meat but I don't buy or cook it. He is ok with this as we take turns cooking so he simply adds meat to his portion or we eat fish (I know Im a hypocrite but eat ethically caught fish) x

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hibbledibble · 02/10/2018 16:35

Yabu

A vegetarian diet is healthier than an omnivorous diet. There is a lot of evidence to back this up.

It's possible to become iron deficient on any diet, it's little to do with being vegetarian or not.

You are conflating poor diets and vegetarian diets.

You could more reasonably say it is selfish to feed a child an omnivorous diet, knowing that a vegetarian diet is healthier.

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MrsJayy · 02/10/2018 16:35

Some people are religiously vegetarian are they selfish too?

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AssassinatedBeauty · 02/10/2018 16:36

@DaniC18 don't worry, you're not a hypocrite, you're just not a vegetarian. Ethically caught fish is still a dead animal. Pescatarian is the word you're after.

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SoyDora · 02/10/2018 16:37

This is nothing to do with her being a vegetarian and everything to do with her feeding him an unsuitable diet. Meat eaters can be iron deficient too, if they don’t eat appropriate foods. I am currently pregnant and anaemic due to not being able to stomach red meat or leafy veg.

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BuntyII · 02/10/2018 16:38

Tell her to give him lentils.

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