To feel past it!

[TomorrowsAnotherDay2]

I'm about to turn 30 and I honestly feel like my best years are behind me. I feel like from now on it's a downwards spiral of aging and life being very monotonous.

My 20s sort of passed my by without me noticing if that makes sense. I don't feel I got to appreciate them. Early 20's were plagued with eating disorders. Mid 20's we started a family and the last 5 years have been a bit of a blur of sleepless nights & running around after toddlers every waking minute. My childhood years weren't great as my mum was very abusive emotionally so I suppose I just feel like so much of life has passed me by without me being able to really live.

I'm just starting to freak out a bit that I'm all of a sudden getting wrinkly & losing any attractiveness that I once had. Like I'm past my best. Has anyone been through this? Am I being completely ridiculous?

I think a lot of people feel like that at some point. I felt the same when I hit 30 too, but it does pass. Try and enjoy your life. It's far too short so make the most of it.

Given what you've said, I think the best is yet to come! You'll be able to enjoy having your own family, your children will get easier (to a point!) as they get older.

Sometimes you have to make things happen. I.e maybe write list of places you'd like to visit or learn something new or set a sporting goal - it can all help to give you more of a sense of purpose.

30 is only young - truly!

I did when I was 30, although I had my first child at 19, and bipolar not an eating disorder, but similar childhood to you by the sounds of it. I had a senior management role at 26, which consumed several years, and I suddenly woke up thinking ‘it’s all downhill’.

I’m now 38, and life is really picking up again. Holidays, independence, kids are older teens and at university, new relationship which I’m head over heels in, new experiences etc I have a life again!

Don’t worry about it. Really it is just a blip.

Rather than dwell on what has happened look to the future of endless possiblitlies.

If you had children mid 20's, in the next 3/5 yrs they will become more independent, in school and this will free your time up a bit. If you go on holiday, they will be that little bit older, maybe even go in holiday clubs, giving you (and DH?) some time together.

As the DC are in school, you can maybe start work if SAHM or look for that promotion or change of job. The potential to earn more which in turn can help with family life and making you feel better about yourself by spending money on/doing the things that make you all happy.

turning 30, 40, 50 etc is just a number, i think it can be a fantastic time to look at what has been and put a 5/10 yr plan in place on what you would like to see happen in the future (it may be even things you feel you have missed out with in the previous decade(

I say that as I turn back to planning my next 3 holidays kid free next year! (See it really does change!)

I agree. Best is yet to come. Children getting older definitely makes things easier in my opinion. Make plans and get yourself out there. Doesn’t have to be anything expensive. As for getting more wrinkles. Who cares. Not everyone gets the chance to get more wrinkles. Embrace life. I’m 44 and am happier now than I’ve ever been. Grey hairs and all.

I didn't feel like this at 30 but I do feel like this approaching 40. But I didn't have my kids until my 30s, so perhaps it's less about age and more about losing yourself after having kids?

I loved being 30. I suddenly felt like the pressure of my 20's to be something and achieve things by a certain age was off and I was free to just be myself. Like I said, I'm approaching 40 now, I'm 38, and I feel like I'm invisible, suddenly old and feel like I'm fighting to get my old self back.

I felt like you at 40 (30 was a blur with young dc) but I m 50 now and starting to have time to myself. I have ds 30 at home and dd 24 but it's nice as they are adults and like housemates.
I m not all wrinkly and past it! I ve got a few crows feet but live with it.
Having the time to myself has let me eat better and lose weight so I m actually healthier than 10 years ago.
Age is a number. 30 is young! Don't define yourself by a date on the calendar