Aibu to still not be over my ex?

[girl78]

It’s been nearly 6 years since we split officially. We were together for 18 months. We’ve tried over the 6 years to get back together but nothing has ever come of it. He doesn’t feel as strongly as I do but I genuinely think he is my soulmate and I’m scared that I’m never going to find someone like him. I’ve dated other people in the 6 years but they are nothing like him.
Wtf is wrong with me? I know I’m not being reasonable, but how do I finally get over him?

It isn't going to happen, is it? He just isn't into you, and you need to face that fact. I don't know how you can get him out of your head, but just stop thinking about him. Find a hobby that men are into - motor bikes, F1, football, the gym?

Thank you for your honesty

To get over a man get under one. Worked for me!! Fling with a soldier, gave me confidence after ex had drained mine, and forced me to accept we were over - was a blessing when I stopped crying!! Moved on pretty quickly after a sex filled fling got me motivated to concentrate on myself, something ex wouldn't have been pleased about!!
Remarried now and every happy!!

Block him. I know people can and do remain friends with exes but it doesn’t work when strong feelings are involved on either side, particularly when it’s one sided like this. He is essentially stringing you along and has been for six years. Sounds like he has you as a back up when he feels lonely tbh. Drop him, block him, find some self esteem.

There is more than one man in the world who is highly compatible with you.

Stop trying to get back together because it's fucking you up.

You need to cut all contact, however hard it seems. If you are being constantly reminded about him you’ll never move on. As others have said, focus on a new hobby, a holiday, friends etc. and you’ll probably meet someone nice before you know it.

I was with the same guy on and off for ten years and nobody in between ever seemed as right for me even though I tried to commit to them. In the end I took a step back and decided what I wanted from my next boyfriend and chose not to compromise on those important things and I met the most amazing man- way better than my ex and I never thought I would say that in a million years. Sadly it's a case of getting over him and going after the things you most want. You will be happy x

Good grief, you are properly picking the scab to stop it healing. Don't keep doing that, it is not what you need.

It's like an addiction, and like an addiction you need to cut it out entirely every day for the rest of your life.

As for taking up a hobby men enjoy, I suggest finding a hobby you enjoy. Keep yourself so busy between now and Christmas that you spend the next 12 weeks too busy to think about him.

That’s what worries me- I’ve not met anyone like him in six years.
I have quite a full life, lots of holidays and hobbies and always busy. Am also active with dating.
Thank you all for advice and honesty x

First of all, why did the relationship end? Was it entirely his decision or did it not work for you either? Are the reasons you split up still valid?
How has it been going for him in the last 6years?
Are you just pining from afar or is he in touch, dangling the proverbial carrot in front of you?
You clearly need closure.
If he is single, I would probably go in guns blazing at this point and just tell him how you feel and if there is no chance for you to let go. Then break of all contact because there will never be a future for you.
If he is in a relationship, just skip the humiliation and cut all ties.
Frankly, at this stage what do you have to lose?

Instead of trying to meet someone like him why not try someone completely different 😉. You might surprise yourself x