to be so sad at loss of birth photos?

[3kidsandmore]

Hello,

I'm looking for some voices of reason please; gently spoken if you would as feeling fragile.

I had our third baby in April and my husband took great care in photographing it all this time around, albeit just with an iphone. The photos were so precious as I'd not managed to photograph the last two births. Fast forward to August - by which time there is a whole summer's worth of family photos - and my iphone died without any warning.

To my horror, being the technophobe that I am, the photos were not backed up to icloud like I'd thought (nor itunes / a storage device).

I've sent it to a specialist data recovery company on the recommendation of an Apple Genius Bar employee and they've informed me today that recovery is impossible owing to a 'faulty NAND chip'.

I have had 5 weeks to prepare for this final worst outcome with it, but still it hurts. I have no one to blame but myself and it's one of my most stupid mistakes to date. I blame being a) a technophobe and b) caught up in having a new baby, a glorious summer and hosting the inlaws here from Oz.

Do photographs really matter more than memories which I'll always have? It's not like I'd have framed them right?

I feel very very blessed in life to have met my wonderful husband and have three healthy children. I am trying to rationalise by reminding myself of the atrocities happening right now all over the world and that people lose actual family members all the time / are faced with serious illness / death / lose all of their worldly belongings in floods or fires.

It's not making it any easier.

When me and exh split he hid all dd's baby pics in his car so I couldn't take any with me. I was distraught - until his car burnt out due to a mechanical fault and he lost them all also! Made me realise having a real life dd was more important -
Or you can have another dc and take more pics?!

am so sorry for you OP but do you really have no other photos of your baby or is it just the day of the birth that you don't have? Didnt your DH have his own phone? What about family and friends who visited the baby? Did you send a pic out when baby was born or post anything on Facebook??

I am unclear as to whether you are grieving for all your baby photos since April or just ones of the birth.

Either way photos are not the be all and end all though I can understand why you feel like you do. I rarely if ever look at my photos and you will always have your happy healthy baby. Make a point of taking loads from now on and backing them up. Check your back up regularly and send them on WhatsApp to other people. You will feel better with tome x

If you'd not photographed the other births then all children are now the same. Just take lots now. This is why I'm glad they had the bounty lady in hospital all 3 have the same new born photo.

19 years ago ( b4 phones and digital cameras were common) I took my first photos of DS on a camera that you had to load the film in. These were photos taken just after his birth.
When I went to collect them from the shop I was told that they didn't come out, the film must not have been loaded Correctly. I stood in that shop and cried.
I still lement their loss occasionally but I have many more great photos.

I think you need to let yourself feel sad. They were important to you.

Thank you so much lovely people. Feeling marginally better already!

Aprilislonggone (sorry technophobe here isn't sure how to properly quote your name!) your username is very apt!

I also can't remember the other usernames but to answer questions;

I have a few photos from April - August which relatives have kindly sent back to me on Whatsapp. However those pics are not the intimate / semi-dressed / family newborn snuggles type.... more the posed ones where the kids are in their sunday best! I sent hundreds to my mum inc half naked ones, but turns out her phone has low storage so she deletes them all

My MIL & FIL in their late 70s flew here to spend time with us from Australia and I have lost all of those lovely photos, which I had wanted to frame for the kids in their bedrooms. I hadn't yet Whatsapped those to my in-laws as they'd only just flown home when my phone died. Gutted.

To the lady who this happened to back in the days of actual cameras... I can imagine your pain at the time. So sad for you.

Oh and my now dead iphone was an iphone6. My husband's is even more ancient; a 5. The camera on mine was slightly better so we always used my phone. That aside, my husband never ever spontaneously takes photos! He relies on me to and just doesn't get as much joy from photos as I do.

Sorry another mention to Aprilislonggone, I can't believe your ex did that. What an awful thing to do and then for the car to burn out, ugh.

I like your suggestion... there is always next time I suppose! There's as much chance of convincing hubby of a 4th as there is resurrecting my dead phone though.

I think more than the actual birth photos I am sad for the whole summer being wiped out and losing the pics of my in-laws with the kids. My DC are all 7 years old and under so sadly aren't likely to remember the lovely things their paternal grandparents did with them.

May be worth your dm asking at a phone shop if they can retrieve her deleted ones. They may be backed up somewhere.

Karma though - his car wasn't insured so he got nowt from the insurance company!!

Awww op, what a shame. Why don't you write down all you can remember of the birth and the summer, maybe as a diary type thing or in the form of a letter to your children? Nice to look back on in future years. You could add tickets/receipts or whatever from your in-laws' visit?

oh, no i would be heartbroken! i’ve always made a point of backing my photos up to my laptop every week or so, and then copying the photos to a memory stick - just in case! obviously that won’t help now but may be a thought for the future.

How did you send them to your mum? Via email? There may be a copy in your “sent” folder if so?

Did you put them on fb? In which case you could get them off there? Sure you’ve thought of that already. Gutted for you x

Agree your mum's phone may be backed up without her knowing. Did you WhatsApp them to her? Have you tried accessing your WhatsApp account from your new phone?

Sorry I know you have probably tried all these things. I am so sorry for you its just crap when these things happen

If you go onto your mums phone , send her a photo now from your number ( I assume you have a new phone and same number)

Go onto your mums phone and the WhatsApp chat with you

Then touch on the latest photo swipe right. It should show the photos you've sent her. Unless she clears the chat. There are different ways on deleting photos. They might still be there. Fingers crossed.