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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

I feel a bit harassed

47 replies

MrsDylanBlue · 01/10/2018 15:24

I have had a stomach bug which several people at work have had.

I have spent most of the day sleeping.

I texted my boss at 7:30 this morning to let her know I am unwell and will not be there today. I was due in at 9. I felt sick, sleepy a d a bit out of it tbh.

For whatever reason my boss is saying that she did not receive my text and phoned me panicking about where I was.

I was asleep and did not receive the call.

I have apologised via text and explained I am unwell and was sleeping. She has then proceeded to send me several lengthy texts bollocking me for not phoning and asking the whereabouts of one of my direct reports who has been signed off for several weeks by a GP.

She has messaged me asking me to call her at 5:30 today.

I am ill (I have not had time off under this manager and my attendance record is always fine).

AIBU to think she should leave me alone to recover?

OP posts:

DarlingNikita · 01/10/2018 16:46

Bubbly, I've never come across the idea of having to call in the afternoon. It's more common IMO to give an estimate when you first call in sick of when you might be back, and then to call/text every morning. Sometimes you just don't know if you feel well enough until you've had a night's sleep.

RangeRider · 01/10/2018 16:54

This thread is killing me! OP is being told how unprofessional she is for texting and not ringing her boss to say she's genuinely ill, and yet in another thread it was downright funny (supposedly) for the OP to shout 'fuck off you cunt' at her boss in the street.... What sort of twisted universe is this?!
OP, don't worry about it. Get the call over with and move on. You've done wrong as such. Direct your boss to the 'cunt' thread and point out how lucky she is to have you as an employee instead!

Dixiechickonhols · 01/10/2018 17:11

Check your employee handbook. I know my last job required a phone call to a Director so no texts or telling a colleague.

BuggerOffAndGoodDayToYou · 01/10/2018 17:13

I don’t see the problem with texting TBH.

Where I work we have to text three managers by 7am and leave a message on the office answerphone (office not manned until 8.30).

If unable to state a return date in that call we are expected to phone by 2.30 pm with an update.

I THINK the managers text back an acknowledgement but I’ve not had a sick day from this place so far (three years .. even I’m amazed) so cant be sure.

DGRossetti · 01/10/2018 17:17

I don’t see the problem with texting TBH.

Because texts aren't guaranteed to get through (same as emails) for a start.

Fluffyears · 01/10/2018 17:17

@darlingnikita we have to call against 3-4 tonsay if we think we’ll be in the next day. I hate it!

DarlingNikita · 01/10/2018 17:19

Fluffyears, are you usually right or wrong in what you predict? I'm intrigued Sometimes after a day on the sofa resting and getting a bit bored, I'd probably feel OK by 4pm and would tell anyone who asked that yes, sure, I'd be back at work the next day.

It's often not the same the next morning though, if you have a restless night with fever or something, or a new symptom makes itself known.

beeefcake · 01/10/2018 17:23

It's a bit OTT. Tell her you texted early on so you could sleep in and were intending on calling her between 9 and 10.

Where I work people will email in to say they are off sick, but that's the public sector for you.

Pursefirst · 01/10/2018 17:24

OP, I have a feeling that your boss is trying to drive the point home that texting is not an acceptable means of communicating an absence, BUT, she is doing it in a very petty way. Hope you feel better soon.

MumW · 01/10/2018 17:27

The phone call is easy. If it starts getting awkward, fake needing to rush to the loo.
"Sorry, TMI but got to go. Need the loo."

pigeondujour · 01/10/2018 17:27

Surely the logical conclusion of 'text isn't okay because it can be missed' is that neither text nor email are acceptable for any work-related communication at all. My boss (a non-arsehole) would absolutely be happy for me to text and would text me too if they weren't coming in.

Chuggachuggatoottoot · 01/10/2018 17:30

Hope you feel better soon OP

Original poster

MrsDylanBlue · 01/10/2018 18:02

I did a bit of grovelling and accepted full responsibility- it was fine

OP posts:

Lizzie48 · 01/10/2018 18:34

I'm glad it worked out; your boss was OTT in hassling you the way she did imo once she realised that you weren't well. Especially as there is a stomach bug doing the rounds.

I hope you recover quickly.

Charlottesshoezzzz · 01/10/2018 18:44

OP you are NOT being harassed. You should have made an actual phone call explaining the situation, it's your fault your boss is now on your case. No way would I be able to just text & expect to be left alone! Unfortunately your employer does have the rights to demand to speak to you. You are overreacting and sound like an ignorant entitled cheeky fucker thinking you can just rest up off work all day without actually speaking to your boss. Man up, yes stomach bugs aren't nice but surely you can manage a quick conversation with your boss.

pigeondujour · 01/10/2018 19:43

^ chill the fuck out

DarlingNikita · 02/10/2018 09:46

You OK, Charlottesshoezzzz?

Glad all is well, OP.

Original poster

MrsDylanBlue · 02/10/2018 10:04

Erm - you ok Charlotte?!

OP posts:

maxthemartian · 02/10/2018 10:12

@Charlottesshoezzzz wow uncalled for!

Celebelly · 02/10/2018 10:22

Blimey. And it's only Tuesday.

SpoonBlender · 02/10/2018 10:27

As a boss of a bunch of people, I'll accept any form of communication in the morning if someone's off ill. Ill people are fucked up, that's part of the package! If all they can do is open an eyelid and send me a text or a work instant message at 7:30am then fall asleep, that's absolutely fine.

I don't want a phone call at 7:30am, that's for sure. It'd freak me out and have me on an adrenaline buzz all day, my immediate reaction would be that something serious has broken.

The one time I didn't see a message (he had sent one, it was in the work IM and got marked read without me actually seeing it) I dropped him a text at 11am asking if he was okay. These are responsible adults and I don't expect them to take the piss - and they don't.

I greatly disapprove of MrsDylan's boss having her grovel. That's shitty.

DGRossetti · 02/10/2018 10:31

Surely the logical conclusion of 'text isn't okay because it can be missed' is that neither text nor email are acceptable for any work-related communication at all.

Not really. But I notice people aren't texting the police in an emergency ....

Text/emails are like postcards. Visible through the system, and no way of knowing whether they actually arrived (unless/until you hear from the recipient - noting that if they replied by text/email ...).

99.9% get through with no issue. But you can't be upset about the 0.1% that didn't.

You can build layers on top of the system to increase/guarantee reliability. At a price.

Obviously a person-to-person phone call is inherently reliable.

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