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AIBU?

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Original poster

iMessage didn't deliver... she wants me to pay her.

166 replies

LiveLiveAnna · 01/10/2018 11:17

Cleaner text me via iMessage asking if she can change her days. I responded through text saying 'no problem see you on ...' - my message didn't deliver to her as she hasn't connected to WiFi over the weekend and has her iMessage enabled. I text her again to confirm and had no response. I had no idea it hadn't delivered to her. She's now turned up on the original day (I haven't been at home to let her in as she has no keys yet) and she's claiming that I need to pay her the £30 for cleaning as I didn't ensure the messages had delivered.

My argument was that if you have your phone set up to receive iMessage, and you send ME an iMessage, you should then ensure that you are connected to WiFi in order to receive my response. If you have iMessage turned on and aren't connected to the WiFi, it's your fault you didn't receive the message...

Who is BU? Me for thinking it's a mix up and I shouldn't have to pay her £30 for cleaning that didn't happen? Or her, for expecting me to pay her £30 when she hasn't done the work because her phone couldn't receive my message?

I sound really annoyed but I haven't actually responded to her voicemail yet so trying to get some honest perspective from AIBU!

Thanks.

OP posts:
Bornlazy · 01/10/2018 14:57

Surely when you send the second message you would have realised the first one hadn’t gone through as it would have said not delivered under it. Nevertheless I still think the onus is on her to establish what day you were expecting her

sunglasses123 · 01/10/2018 15:05

This wont help but I got very sick of cleaners about 10 years ago. Their issues became your issues, they wanted to bring their children along (without telling me and I found 4 kids wandering around the house unsupervised when I came back unexpectedly). One wanted to share the cleaning with someone else and that gave me double trouble as they fell out with each other and proceeded to call me separately asking if they could clean solo. Another one just didn't turn up 50% of the time and made endless excuses as to why she couldn't come.

I only wanted my house clean!!

Too much grief and now I do the cleaning myself. Its not ideal but better than a lot of mucking around!

Vickster99 · 01/10/2018 15:07

YANBU - its totally her fault. If you value her as a cleaner just tell her to come and clean on the alternative day you originally siuggested and pay her for that

ciderhouserules · 01/10/2018 15:08

Yes she should have checked but so should you have. - she (cleaner) is the one offering the service for which she wants to be paid. She is the one who wanted to change the arrangement. She should have checked that her message got through, and that OP was OK with it. She didn't get the replies, due to her own problems.

Why should OP 'have to' check that the cleaner got her reply ? Cleaner should have checked that all was OK.

DarlingNikita · 01/10/2018 15:41

Peonylover123, that's a load of rubbish. If you contact someone to change an arrangement and don't hear back, you contact them again until you've ascertained what the arrangement now is. It's not up to them.

It'd be like texting a friend to say 'Can we meet for coffee Thursday instead of Friday?', not hearing back and turning up on Thursday, then fuming at them because they hadn't got the message and hadn't turned up. When the obvious thing is to re-send the message (or call them or whatever) and say 'Did you see, I was asking about rescheduling?'

MimiSunshine · 01/10/2018 15:44

Am I being a bit thick, or couldn't you just say yes I’ll pay you the £30 bit you still need to come and clean the house this week. [new day you requested] works fine for me.

sunglasses123 · 01/10/2018 15:58

Mimi - I think she wants the money for the cleaning session that didn't actually take place due to her misunderstanding the arrangements.

As others said - if you don't hear back you need to check that the NEW day is OK. Its your issue that you want to change the day. See what I mean - cleaners issues become your issue.

CrunchieFriday · 01/10/2018 16:00

Absolutely agree with the PP who said if she could leave a voicemail to be rude to you....then she was perfectly capable of leaving you a polite one to confirm what hours she was working.

I wouldn't pay her a bean.

She has lost out because of her own inability to stay in contact. To then be rude to a customer is ridiculous. You can't run a business like that.

Belina · 01/10/2018 16:44

If you want to keep her pay half if you dont pay nothing
Wasn't your fault though she should of checked via I message

carpettile · 01/10/2018 16:51

I agree with OP the fact that she wanted to change and assumed you hadn't replied so presumably cancelled whatever it was she was doing to make her commitment to you seems really reliable to me. Its been a rubbish mix up and I understand your frustration. I would either pay her and say lets communicate better next time or pay half as another poster mentioned. Especially if she is good at her job and out of character as you said.

sunglasses123 · 01/10/2018 17:29

Its the sign of the times in that people send a text and think their job is done. Never mind that the other person could have lost their phone, be in a meeting all day etc. You have told them and it becomes THEIR issue that they don't pick it up.

I would if at all possible find another cleaner. For me it was the stroppy VM that would have made me decide.

Angrybird345 · 01/10/2018 17:35

I wouldn’t pay her, she is chancing her luck. I also wouldn’t want her back in my house, just in case uses my toothbrush to clean the toilet!

GabsAlot · 01/10/2018 17:43

nah shes wrong

if you want to change a date you chase up till its confirmed not just wait and say i havent heard nothing i'll just turn up on normal day withut checking

if she can leave you a vm she couold have rung in the first place

NHW95 · 01/10/2018 17:45

I agree it was definitely the cleaners fault, she should have followed up.

I work as a nanny and I recently had to text my boss my mileage costs for the month. I sent a lovely text (which she did receive) and she transferred the money over straight away, however as it was the weekend the money wasn’t due to come into my account until Monday. I didn’t know this as she didn’t reply to my message (I can imagine she got distracted by the kids and forgot) so I messaged her again the next day to which she explained the situation to me.

I see this as sort of a similar situation to which your in OP, although I realise my boss should have responded to the first message, I wasn’t going to sit on it all weekend and worry hence why I messaged her again. I would rather message someone the same thing a 100 times until they reply with confirmation than just assume they’ve received the message.

The cleaner really should have called you or at least messaged you again for confirmation, even if she felt she was annoying you it’s something we all have to do as adults from time to time.

WidowTwonky · 01/10/2018 17:50

bornlazy you seem to be misunderstanding. The message did send. It just wasn’t received. There would’ve been no error message saying ‘not delivered’

LavenderBush · 01/10/2018 17:50

Absolutely her fault and not yours. You do not owe her.

My lovely cleaner didn't even request payment when she turned up at the right time and found I'd gone out and accidentally double locked the door so she couldn't get in. (I did pay her for the missed day's work, though - in those circumstances I think it is the right thing to do.)

TheOxymoron · 01/10/2018 18:00

It was her mistake and she should have just accepted that and then just move on.
If she has been rude then of course you should let her go. There is no excuse to be rude and demanding.
For all those saying the OP should pay.. absolutely ridiculous!
If the woman is struggling that much then she should have thought twice before she has left a rude voicemail, also, why assume the OP has £30 to just throw around?
I would give her 24hrs to apologise as maybe she reacted too hastily and regret it but if she didn’t then I would find somebody else.

NewPapaGuinea · 01/10/2018 18:34

She was expecting a reply and didn’t get one. She should have checked her phone was set to be able to receive the message. Her error and she should chalk it up to experience and maybe not use imessage which is infamously unreliable.

sunshinewithabitofdrizzle · 01/10/2018 18:34

I'm confused. If I send a message and it can't go as an imessage, it automatically sends as a text message instead. I haven't set anything up to do that, it was the default setting on my phone. Unless she's purposely turned that off, she should have received it as a text message, in which case you can't see if she's received it or not, it just shows as sent.

Rhondacross · 01/10/2018 18:36

"Its the sign of the times in that people send a text and think their job is done. Never mind that the other person could have lost their phone, be in a meeting all day etc. You have told them and it becomes THEIR issue that they don't pick it up."
Well said.

myusernamewastakenbyme · 01/10/2018 19:17

I wouldnt pay her and my back would be up over the snotty voicemail....so i think i would let her go.

flowerythorns · 01/10/2018 22:05

I'd be really pissed off.

Like pp I've had such a load of shit cleaners. I cba anymore.

I bet there's some fabulous ones but I just got work shy thieves.

WhateverHappenedToTheHeatwave · 01/10/2018 22:11

I wouldn't pay and after a stroppy message i would let her go.

The onus was on her to check for responses and call you if she had none. Her problem not yours.

TotHappy · 01/10/2018 23:15

I dunno, not sure you should pay her, I think it was a mix up, but an understandable one.

From her pov, she asked to change days, didn't get a reply so just thought 'fair enough, I'll ask her in person when I see her on my regular day'. I mean, I probably would chase with another message or phonecall but if it wasn't urgent and she didn't want to hassle you, I can see why she didn't.

Basically, I'm saying if you've asked to change and had no response, you assume the original arrangement stands. Pp's example above is wrong - if you asked to move a coffee with friend from Friday to Thursday and they don't respond, you show up on Friday. They can't get shorty with you for that - in the absence of any new agreement, the default is the original agreement.

I suspect the shorty voicemail came before she knew about the failed message, so she thought you'd agreed to her request, but expected her to realise that by psychic powers. I'd be pissed off too.

Jamiefraserskilt · 01/10/2018 23:31

Tell her if she doesnt get a reply...Pick up the bloody phone and talk. You get an instant answer.
Her phone obviously has the rare calling feature as she left a message.
No, don't entertain this.

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