To ask how full time workers how they hell they can stop spending all their weekends doing bloody housework?

[therewillbetime]

Boring but serious question- work all week, leaving house at 7.30 and getting home 6.30 ish. DP, who also works all day gets home slightly earlier and always cooks, feeds cats etc. He does his own ironing.

I do little housework during the week apart from those everyday things you have to do or course as a) I’m knackered and b) I frequently have work related paperwork to do or study (I’m studying for an MA part time as well). I also go to the gym most nights so I admit that I cram a bit in.

This weekend I thought I was pretty much on top of things at home. Dp and I did all the food shopping yesterday but still I realise that this weekend I’ve done tons of washing (I have a teenage son), ironing, tidying, hoovering, dusting and cooking. I’ve been to the gym but combined this with my college work (reading on the treadmill) and we did relax and watch a movie last night. Dp did a load of stuff in the garden.

I am just really interested in how full time workers manage it all with the result of saying they had a weekend, or most of a weekend to do stuff not related to the home. Or maybe, everyone lives like this and I’m a whinging git!

anrolnotrom In Ireland it costs €20 for a 2 hour house clean, which would be the normal time cleaners come for. I personally give a good bit more, as our cleaner has been with us for years and we have given more through the years.

Um, recognise my home is not a show home and anyone who thinks it should be is not worth my time?

As long as it's safe, healthy, habitable, reasonably orderly, and not at the tipping point whe it becomes depressing, then I'm fine.

I don't need it to be constantly immaculate to be happy and healthy. Unless you enjoy cleaning as your hobby/therapeutic reasons or you're running a guesthouse, it doesn't need to be more than that?

I strongly suspect the reason we've ended up with impossibly unrealistic expectations of how clean/tidy/show-home-like our homes should be is because it justified keeping women out of the workplace (and removing them from the workplace again to make way for men after the last war ended) if they were burdened with thankless, near on impossible housekeeping standards that occupied all their time.

I do washing in the week, try to tidy and clean up as I go during the week then spend either sat/sun as a jobs day and the other day to do something nice. And it's not the end of the world if I have plans all weekend and I don't!

Can I just say that for those of you who can't afford a cleaner ironer etc.
You are doing great! Don't beat yourselves up for not doing what you think should be more. Give yourselves a big pat on the back.

I’m afraid we also have a cleaner, sadly not at £20 a week! We pay 3x£13 and hour, it was every 2 weeks but it’s now every week which literally means I have to occasionally vacuum and then deep clean things from time to time.
Then washing, a load goes on most nights, sometimes 2, I tumble dry as much ch as I can and hang the rest on the airer, means there isn’t loads at the weekend. Dry clothes I dump on our bed do I can’t go to bed until they are folded and put away. I do most of the cooking but not all, whoever isn’t doing DS bath and bedtime clears up the kitchen.
There’s a weekly tidy up the night before the cleaver comes and ever other week I strip the beds in the morning then she makes them up, the first load of bedding goes in the wash that morning on a timer so it’s ready for the dryer when we get home.
I have to nag DH to pull his weight and do things like empty full bins and not play jenga balancing one more milk carton on top etc.
I don’t do ironing more than every few months. I have non- iron work dresses, DH has non-iron trousers and polo shirts. Things are either dried on hangers or folded and dried straight from the tumble dryer and are passable.
This leaves our weekends largely free except for big DIY jobs and gardening.

I have accepted that term time weekends have very little down or me time. If i get a 5K in the park, a long bath and to sit down with a movie on Saturday night I consider that a good weekend.

anrol between £20 and £30 to clean a 3 bed terrace here, £10 an hour.

Sorry, that is totally full of typos, hopefully people can figure it out!

I went FT last year. The following have helped a bit:
Cleaning: Lower standards. Tidy and do a little cleaning every evening so not all needs done at weekend.

Laundry: Do frequent laundry washes (less crushed), iron only if essential, fold clothes as soon as dry, nag family to wear fewer clothes. Buy extra school uniforms.
Meals: Online shopping; cook simpler meals; encourage DH to cook a meal a week; buy more takeaways. Use the slow cooker - often tastes bit crap but better than starting from scratch after full day at work.

Chill a bit at the weekend- if the grass isn’t cut/cars not washed/beds not changed every week the world won’t come to a crashing end.
Having said that, it’s still all bloody hard work! Best coping strategy is learning to take pride in how hard you are working. (Until the meltdown hits!).

I found decluttering cut down the amount I needed to clean by a lot. Even just a quick go through with stuff you know you want to get rid of. Clothes was a massive one. I went from washing daily to almost every other day.

We also live in a 2 bedroom terrace so there is not much to clean which is a massive help.

Have a cleaner
Tidy as I go
Get others to assist
Do bits in the evening

We clean on a Friday night then get a takeaway after. We do both bathrooms and the kitchen, hoover all the upstairs and sweep and mop the downstairs (four bed house). Takes about 1.5 hours between us both. Dusting etc gets done periodically. I wouldn't say my house is spotless (I have dogs too) but a couple of friends make comments that our house is always super clean, so I don't think it's too bad.

Just me and DP, both working full time, and a very hairy cat. We both have set tasks. I like to blitz things on a Friday after work, because I get home early, so I polish, clean the bathroom thoroughly, stick washing on, and do a proper clean of the kitchen. DP does hoovering and mopping on a Saturday, and is also responsible for bins, recycling, the garden, and the dishwasher. I tend to do a load of laundry every second or third night, sweep the kitchen floor daily, and give the toilet and bathroom sink a clean every couple of days. Our bed gets stripped and changed every Saturday. I do iron, but do it as I go, so 20 minutes every few days rather than ages at the weekend.

I’m a lecturer and get long holidays, so things like skirting boards, tops of cupboards, the fridge and so on tend to be left until then. I agree with everyone who mentioned lowering standards!

We do a bit on Saturday morning and get the wash on but we have a cleaner. I want to spend the time I do have at home with dc not cleaning!

Why are you doing your teenager’s laundry?!

ouchlegohurts but if it only takes 2 hours to clean the house then the whole weekend wouldn't be used up anyway. I suspect the OPs house takes most of the weekend to clean, thus the problem that they have no weekend.

Oh and we have a mini dyson for mini clear ups. Dc can use it and it's fab for crumbs on tables too.

We all pitch in.
DP and I find different tasks satisfying so we'll tend to do those.
Kids all do their own laundry. The system is that we all have a bag in our rooms, and we each take them down and wash, dry, bring up, put away ourselves so nobody's socks get mixed up.
They all know how to wash particular types of wash. Kid2 likes to use colour catchers so he chucks one of those in.

The children have been wiping surfaces down, washing dishes, weeding since they were quite young.

One person can't do all the cooking and cleaning for a whole family and also work outside the home.

It's as much about respect for you as it is about how the house looks.

Kid2 emptied the dishwasher and swept and steam mopped the kitchen today. Kid1 wiped the surfaces down and filled the dishwasher.

Do you really need to go to the gym EVERY night AND at the weekend?

Rota.
3 kids and 2 adults. (Kids are teens)
Hoover, kitchen, bathroom, cook. One job every day. One gets a day off.

Cleaner once a week for deeper clean.
Don't iron unless I need it. Each does his/her own.

House is not 'my' responsibility. It's all of ours.

@lpchill how does having fewer (decluttered) clothes reduce your washing from once a day to every other day? Surely the wear usage (eg one outfit a day) is the same regardless of how many clothes are in the wardrobe

The choices are lower standards, have a cleaner, or try and do it all at the expense of having a life.

I work full time, have an 11 yo and 2 dogs. DH left in May but still comes here every day to walk dogs and be here for DS after school. He will have a cursery sweep round but the rest is on me. I do dome dog walking, cook, do the dishwasher, wipe surfaces, do washing, ironing, bathrooms and sweep floors. I also sort anything DS related, so school, friends, clubs etc, encouraging homework etc, Dusting, deep cleaning, windows, oven, fridge, cupboards, garden, cleaning car and less well used rooms tend to get left or are done much less often than I would like. Some of the things I do, also get done less often than I would like. I have lower standards than some but can get away with a lot by keeping public areas tidy 😊 I can’t afford a cleaner.

I throw money at the problem, tbh. We have a cleaner, I do my online shop on my commute, we get a Hello Fresh box so we don't even have to think about what we're going to cook on the days we're both working. I have a tumble dryer so I can whiz through the laundry, I spent slightly more on DD1's shirts for school so that they're non iron, etc etc. I was just moaning to DH that I hadn't had time to put the garden to bed this weekend and he told me to get someone in to do it.

I do also hear excellent things about The Organised Mum method too. I'd consider it if I didn't really hate cleaning 😁.

Do your shopping online, takes less than 20 minutes one evening in the week. Get it delivered at a time to suit.

Get your teenager to do some chores ie hoovering, dusting, changing his bedding, ironing his own clothes. Pay him if necessary.

Thank you all for your many responses.

Its bizarre how my mindset had not even considered getting a cleaner (probably harks back to the 'rich' stereotype!) but put into perspective in terms of say, £20 a week, it would make a big difference.

Yes, I have been pushing teen to do more and I will continue to push!

No, I probably don't need to go to the gym most nights but it is 45 minutes of clearing my head; I have a really full on job and it helps me sleep well etc so benefits outweigh time spent massively.

Will definitely do the laundry every day from now on and not leave it all till the weekend.

I did used to do more housework during the week but studying has just reduced that time . Its interesting to hear everybody's experiences.