To speak to my family on the phone?

[peonysandhotcrossbuns]

My sister lives in France and we spend up to 2 weeks missing each other's FaceTime calls. When we finally get to catch up its usually an hour. She suffers with her mental health and Im good at cheering her up.

My husband always leaves our 2 year old in the room with me while Im on the phone which means Im distracted by her crying and whining because Mummy is daring to not give 100% attention to her! I ask him to take her then have to put up with him sulking with me for the rest of the day because it "irritates" hime, me being on the phone.

Other phone calls are 10 mins max to my 2 Grannies very sporadically maybe once every 3 or 4 weeks. My dad maybe once a week but always a max of 10 mins.

I rarely go out with friends and never invite them round because he is left holding the baby.

The thing is he isn't interested in having any kind of social life he never has been, he never rings his family.

His daughter, my step daughter stays with us every wed, fri and every other weekend and at these times I put myself on the back burner/ deal with our toddler so he can have time with her. He can't seem to appreciate that I'm giving him space to nurture his rl with his DD but when I try to with m family, he is very stingy and begrudging.

SO aibu to speak to my family on the phone meaning he's left holding the baby as it were?

He's a controlling arse. Surely you know yanbu.

Google for 'red flags for controlling behaviour' and see how many you recognise, because I can see 3 in your post.

This isn't just about you being on the phone; he also doesn't want to parent his own child. Then sulks when he doesn't get his own way.

I can see today how he's been with our DD all day really because I went to a meeting for 3 hours this morning then when i got home I had this phone call so I suppose he hasn't had any time away from our DD to rest.
He also does 99.9% of the getting up with our DD if she wakes in the night (she's doing this a lot lately because she's ill)
So he isn't horrible.
He also says that he knows it isn't right that he feels like this, he just does.
I don't really know what to do other than present him with a list of why it's so important to me to maintain my rl with my family so he feels less angry.
Yesterday he wanted to spend the day putting a shelf up but I argued that we needed to get onto of the house work and the food shopping so I fell that he is still a bit annoyed about that.

I had to read that again just to make sure I was reading it correctly! Seriously?? Please do not tolerate that behaviour. He sulks for a whole day because you’ve made a phone call?! Are you able to talk to him & tell him how he makes you feel?

Cross posted OP