To be upset about this.
LisaDav · 30/09/2018 16:16
This is confusing, so I'll try to explain the best I can.
I've been with my DP for 5 years and we're in a great place in our relationship. The ex boyfriend I had before my DP, we broke up 4 months before me and my DP got together.
Ive just been told my ex is now dating my brothers ex girlfriend and they've been together for almost a year!! My brother and his ex share a daughter together. My brother doesn't seem too bothered by it, but I'm absolutely fuming!!
Whilst we were together, My brother and his ex were also together at the same time. I used to bring him to my nieces birthday parties, so they both met before.
My ex lost his dad and I had to give him CPR before he died, he has always been thankful that I tried to save his dad, and I thought after what I had done, he would of had a bit of respect not to cop off with someone so close to me.
We broke up because he wouldn't get a job, and I paid for everything. All the time me and my current DP have been together, my ex has always tried to get back in contact and I've always shut it down.
I'm absolutely fuming with the fact he's now dating my nieces mother!! I have no feelings there, but I just feel this is too close to home. Where is the respect and loyalty?
AIBU to feel this way?
MrsStrowman · 30/09/2018 18:26
They got together four years after you split, it's not like they had an affair. You are being massively unreasonable, you either still have feelings for him or you just liked the thought that he was pining after you, except he's not, or maybe he's changed his ways for her in a way he never did for you and that stings, either way you sound unreasonably bitter.
MiddleClassProblem · 30/09/2018 18:58
At best it’s a bit weird and might be a bit awkward if you all see each other at first but you’re all adults, happy with other people... what’s the people.
And your comment giving his dad cpr... wow. It’s not a debt he owes you. You did a wonderful thing and you’re using it in such an awful way.
MrsReacher1 · 30/09/2018 19:54
Actually I would be really upset by this!
Do people really not realise how uncomfortable it is to have your ex, whom ideally you'd prefer not to see at all again, becoming a member of your extended family?? I really doubt you'd all be so chilled to have to see your ex at family gatherings, celebrate the birth of their baby because she/he will be your niece's half sister.
I sensed that OP felt a bit pursued by the ex who wouldn't leave her as alone as she would have liked.
So no OP there is nothing you can do but I get that you feel upset.
RebelRogue · 30/09/2018 20:00
@MrsReacher1 they've been together nearly a year and she didn't even know about it,much less see him. They're obviously not that close extended family,or the gatherings are few and far between. Tbh I doubt she'll have to see him unless it's a big event for the niece,hosted by the mum,as it normally happens with extended families of separated couples.
Notacluewhatthisis · 30/09/2018 20:01
MrsReacher1 really? It's not her extended family. It's her nieces mum. Who she doesn't have anything to do with or she would have known she was seeing her ex.
The only celebration they will all be at will be things for niece. Which the op can choose to not go to, if she can't really get past the fact that her ex of 5 years is seeing someone she barely knows. And it says a lot if she can't get past it and just not and smile for the sake of her niece.
Who hee ex sil and ex dp go out with is non of her business.
number1wang · 30/09/2018 20:15
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