When is it an aceeptable point to stop contact?

[3boysonemum1972]

My son sees his dad every other weekend, we had agreed on rules, boundaries and consequences and consistency to be followed in both households.
Our son has attachment disorder and he needs consistency, routine, etc to help him cope. For the last few months he's been coming home fully wired and when asked why he says he's been on games (electronics which we agreed on 1 or 2 hours a day) when I asked his dad more he said electronics day and until he falls asleep otherwise he's hard work (!!) He doesn't clean his teeth, wash, bathe, eat real meals, he just snacks... its getting to the point where I work really hard for 11 days and just as I make progress he undoes all my work... and then the hygiene and lack of proper diet... I'm becoming increasingly concerned about our son. No amount of talking to his dad has any effect at all... it seems he wants an easy life to the detriment of our son... what can I do? I have considered stopping contact but I don't think it would benefit our son long term although short term it may, I am beginning to feel he uses the electronics as a babysitter and is actually neglecting our son but would appreciate advice/views of others thanks

Same here, either there is more to this or confusion over the diagnosis.

There is no confusion over diagnosis... I'm not someone who self diagnosis myself or my children, there is more to our son's background relating to neglect but it's not relevant to the question or advice asked for...
I'm querying if there is anything I can do to help my son, he's not old enough and doesn't have enough self control to say no to electronics and it is having a detrimental effect on him

Ok well @SeaToSki makes some good suggestions.

he's not old enough and doesn't have enough self control to say no to electronics and it is having a detrimental effect on him

A history of DV, drug- abuse and significant untreated MH problems are frequently not seen as a justifiable reason to withhold contact. So I think you are going to find it very difficult to use what sounds like differing parenting styles to explain to a court why contact should be stopped, as well as your DS when he is older.