Name calling at school

[Creeper8]

My son told me today after school that the other children have been laughing at him and calling him names. My son hates school and Im wondering if this is the reason why. I had this issue in year 1 and it obviously hasnt stopped in year 2. Aibu to expect the school to do more? what would you expect of the school? would you approach the childrens parents separately?

My daughter hates hair. It was cropped short, on her request when she was 7.
Loads of kids teased her, told her she looked like a boy and do you know what? She soon learned to retaliate. I believe she responded with 'I don't like hair' and that was that! She's 11 now, and its still super pixie short. Some smartass at school ( just started secondary) told her she looked like a boy and it didn't bother her- she wants this hair and she rightly recognises dickish comments will be made but its not her problem.
I understand your child is younger but he shouldn't have to cut his hair. But with your help can develop a thicker skin in regards to it.
As pp mentioned about ginger, I got teased about my curly hair and buck teeth. Kids are just a bit knobish if they think they've found a thing to tease.
Speak to his teacher, and start building a bit of confidence in re: how he wears his hair. Best of luck x

By the way, since this intervention he's a different child. He loves school. And he wants to grow his hair again... Bullying in any form is NOT acceptable and they have to deal with each individual case. Some children can shrug it off but in our case,and seems like yours it's not as simple as that. Sorry for the long post but this is something I feel extremely strongly about. Write down everything, say you've been seeing how it goes and it's not stopping so some intervention needs doing or youl take it further.

"Ignoring the occasional off comment can be a useful skill. Ignoring sustained teasing (moving to bullying) is not. School need to be a lot more proactive in stamping down on this. And no he doesnt have to cut his hair if he doesnt want to. The problem is not with him."

This.

My long-haired DS is a similar age to yours, OP. He deals fine with people's semi-innocent "are you a boy or girl" type questions. He is learning to deal with the odd one-off instances when someone pushes it a bit further. All of that is, as the previous poster said, a useful life skill and actually seems to be boosting his confidence and sense of self. I haven't had occasion to talk to the teacher as it all seems in hand. I don't think DS has either, though we have taught him the mantra, "Please stop I don't like that" followed by "Please stop that now or I will get a teacher" as I agree with other posters that ignoring doesn't work - someone who wants a reaction will just escalate the goading until they get one.

If he had been blocked from using the loos by classmates I would be making an appointment to see the teacher like a shot. That is on a very different level.

Mornings would be easier if DS would agree to have his hair cut but if and when he does, I hope it's because HE wants to. Learning the lesson that you should bend to peer pressure for social acceptance, definitely isn't one I'd want him to learn.

Your poor little boy - that definitely IS bullying!

Ask the teacher for a proper sit down meeting with them to discuss it - not just a chat on the doors at drop off or pick up. Don't be fobbed off - keep asking. If they don't arrange it within a couple of days, go to the Head & similarly if they don't take it seriously enough or it doesn't stop, go to the Head.

I appreciate that kids are kids & it could be argued that they all take a certain amount of teasing & it's part of their emotional learning to be able to deal with stuff like that but when it's a 6yr old child who has developed a hatred of school & is forced into wetting himself, that is NOT OK in the slightest!! The 'bullies also need to be taught that their actions/words are mean & won't be tolerated - they're old enough to know that they're being unkind!

If you get nowhere, keep badgering & badgering - request the Head records a formal complaint & go to the Governors if necessary.

Good luck & tell your son he is brilliant as he is & should not have to cut his hair if he doesn't want to. We live in a massively diverse world these days - the school wouldn't tolerate persistent verbal bullying towards disabled children, ethnic children, children with special needs, etc so how is this any different?

Your poor little boy,that is bullying and the head should be dealing with it .Why should should he cut his hair .Just a though OP my youngest DC was a really shy ,quiet child really lacking in self confidence .They started doing jujitsu over a year ago and has since gone up 2 belts. The change in their confidence is amazing even teachers have noticed ,they are in year 5 .Not saying start learning it to use it but it gives them confidence just a thought .But certainly don't let it drop go as high as you have to bullying is never acceptable .

The same three kids? Definitely bullying. (Sorry from your OP I couldn’t work out if it was different kids saying things not but not a pattern). Keep records and report. The school have a duty to keep your child safe.

Yeh it seems to be the same 3 boys however he says that the reception children have also said it. Ive told to tell him to stick up for himself like I said but he doesnt really get it. He is mixed race and wears his hair in cornrows we live in london and its not exactly uncommon. But children will pick on anything I guess.

Will speak to the school again on monday and hopefully get it taken more seriously!

Don't make him get his hair cut because it'll stop the bullying. That's dreadful advice.

If he's shy and quiet it's likely they'll find something else to pick on him about.

My ds was called a spastic for a long time. I couldn't exactly tell him to get his cerebral palsy cured to stop it! I told the school to be proactive and sort it. They did