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AIBU?

Entitled little shits! Rage with me!

38 replies

PeapodBurgundy · 28/09/2018 17:39

How would people handle neighbours children helping themselves to things from the garden? When we first moved in, there were some tyres and planks of wood that my son plays with (making balance beams etc) on the front lawn (fenced off so clearly our lawn) that a friend had collected from our old house and dropped off while we were out. I arrived home to find two lads helping themselves to the tyres. I said that we needed them and that they weren't rubbish, ans asked them to put them back on our lawn, to be met with an argument and an earful of cheek. (I was a hell of a lot more polite than they were, and much more so than I felt like being). Any time there's anything out there, they try to take it (not an option to play in the back at the moment as there's a half built conservatory and associated tools etc all over the garden, my kids are 2 and newborn so it's not appropriate to take them out there). I don't leave anything out there really any more, but in the time it takes me to bring the toddler in for a wee, our property is off out on the green, and I have to fight to get it back. I've just had to go out and retrieve the football goal that they were merrily lifting over the fence (no room for it out back until the conservatory is finished). I'm not precious about our garden or our belongings, if they'd asked in the first instance I wouldn't mind them being borrowed, but given their entitled attitude, I won't loan them anything, because it just gives ammunition for them to continue to take what they want from us, and I doubt we'd get it back. They're the same with next doors too, who we get on well with.
Their parents and their Nana (I assume) are sat on the front, so the adults responsible for caring for them are fully aware of what's going on. OH spoke with the Nana a while back when they were ripping bits off our fence, and he got an earful about how the fence was broken already and nothing to do with them. (It was broken, and does need replacing, but we need to fix up the inside first. You could clearly see the colour difference in the wood where the freshly snapped bits were, and there were splinters on the ground so very obviously fresh damage).
We've put cameras on, with no effect. They're currently kicking the football at the window, and knocking on the door and running away every time they come into the garden to retrieve it.
I want to contact the police/PCSOs but I'm worried about the fallout. Any ideas of an alternative? Or how I'd find out if they have a landlord I could speak with?

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TheOxymoron · 28/09/2018 17:46

Get a plank of wood you don’t want and smear it in dog shit underneath.
They may think twice in the future. Job done.

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Ixnayonthehombre · 28/09/2018 17:49

Oxymoron idea is bloody genius. Shit, fresh paint, you could have fun with this.

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planetclom · 28/09/2018 17:50

Just report them, there will be fall out but they will get worse and more entitled if you don't anyway so best start the process ASAP. Also find out who their landlord is if they are tenants. And if you are start looking for somewhere else to live at the end of you current agreement and tell your land lord why you are leaving.

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SpottingTheZebras · 28/09/2018 17:50

@TheOxymoron Grin

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HolesinTheSoles · 28/09/2018 17:53

WTAF? YADNBU! How old are the CFs? I love OxyMoron's idea!

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PeapodBurgundy · 28/09/2018 18:11

I have two cats so an endless supply of cat shit if that could be substituted Oxmoron Grin
We own ours, so won't be going anywhere for years yet (just bought it a few weeks ago). No idea if they own theirs, I only know the status of the houses either side of us. Do you think I'd be able to find out if I contacted the local council?
At a guess I'd say the two who are here regularly are 8 and 10, so old enough to know better.

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HolesinTheSoles · 28/09/2018 18:13

Definitely old enough to know better (my 6 year old would know better) but the parents/nana are even cheekier to allow them to do it.

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Fiffyshadesofgreymatter · 28/09/2018 18:15

Can you run a hose round from the back. Any time they start trying to lift something, hose them!

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Aprilislonggone · 28/09/2018 18:17

Missing the point but getting spelks out of a toddler's hands is a nightmare mind!

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DuchessThingy · 28/09/2018 18:21

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Mmer · 28/09/2018 18:22

I would report them tbh. They are stealing from you, and the parents aren't handling it.

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PeapodBurgundy · 28/09/2018 18:23

Fiftyshades we could easily, but we've put cameras on the front of the house to collect evidence so I want to keep my nose clean so we'll stand half a chance of being taken seriously if and when we do report them to somebody. That's the only thing which stopped me from going out with a knife to see to thee football!

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LookAtMeLookAtMoy · 28/09/2018 18:25

Have a look at uksocialhousing.com to see if it's a local authority house or you can pay at the land registry website to see who the owner is.

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SeaToSki · 28/09/2018 18:25

Motion activated sprinkler, soak them. If they protest say its to eradicate a plague of cf mites

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Tumilnaughts · 28/09/2018 18:28

I would have already logged it with the police. It's attempted theft wether or not they're only 10. Regardless of age they're trespassing and attempting to steal from you.

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PeapodBurgundy · 28/09/2018 18:28

Somebody who lives locally has given me the email address of the local PCSO who is combating this sort of thing (talking to the parents and trying to engage the kids in productive activities). I'll be emailing her when I've decided exactly what I want to say (I'm a waffler as you've likely noticed, so it will take me a while to get the email down to a reasonable length). I couldn't give a hoot about them playing football on the green, or the ball accidentally coming over the fence (it's only low so it will easily happen often). At the risk of sounding decades older than I am, I like seeing kids playing outdoors as it's not as common as it was when I was a kid myself. It's the taking of my son's belongings, and the stick I'm getting for objecting to it which I want stopping.

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AllTakenSoRubbishUsername · 28/09/2018 18:29

Your neighbours sound horrendous! I think I would get the building work finished pronto and keep everything in until you can put it in the back garden. Your children are so little they probably won't really notice and you could play other games with them out the front that don't involve things. Can you also get a higher fence and lockable gate at the front for more privacy?

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Tumilnaughts · 28/09/2018 18:33

I had similar youth shenanigans this week and rang the police to log it. Turns out they had been harassing people all over the estate. I too sound decades older than I am. I like seeing kids play outdoors but it's kids like this that ruin it for the ones that play nice.

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OhWhatFuckeryIsThisNow · 28/09/2018 18:36

,Did your estate agent/vendor mention about the anti social neighbours?
Pcso-not that they or their feckless carers give a shit. But having had years of little twats banging on my windows, just because I work at a school, it doesn't stop quickly, then they get older and more serious.

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PeapodBurgundy · 28/09/2018 18:37

Building work is taking a depressingly long amount of time as we're doing the work ourselves to keep the costs down. Between the kids and OH's work, it's a slow, slow process.
I'll admit I'm struggling to juggle breastfeeding and looking after the toddler, I may have bitten off more than I can chew with a second DC but that's a saga for another day so it's a lazy option to bung a few toys on the lawn, park up on the bench with the baby and a flask, and leave him to it. He'll play independently for ages outdoors; he's more demanding than I can cope with indoors all day. I need to find a play area with a fence. The nearest one has no fence, so I daren't go in case he bolts off and I can't catch up to him with the baby in my arms.

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PeapodBurgundy · 28/09/2018 18:42

OhWhatFuckery no they didn't, but they didn't mention a lot of things, nor did a lot of things we've since discovered come up on the survey even though we paid for the expensive bells and whistles one (money down the bloody drain!!). There was a muddy football print on the window when we moved in, so I'm guessing it's an ongoing problem.
The green we face onto is triangular, we're at the widest edge which isn't backing onto a road, so they're always going to play up this end (I was aware of that before we put an offer in, and don't mind the playing, I do mind the theft and abuse though). I just need to get them to keep off our garden, stay on the green to play, and everyone is happy.

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Findingdotty · 28/09/2018 18:49

Oxymoron's idea is great...but I wouldn't use it as I wouldn't want to give them the idea of using shit themselves. You could create more of a problem than you have already.

This sounds a real pain OP. Angry Hope you find a solution.

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endofthelinefinally · 28/09/2018 18:49

Barbed wire fencing, 6 ft high, like you see round high security buildings. Worth spending a bit of time securing your property so you can get on with your building work in peace.

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SkintAsASkintThing · 28/09/2018 18:55

Anti vandal greas on the fence..........just a thin line so it isn't obvious though Wink

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HighwayDragon1 · 28/09/2018 18:58

Anti climb/vandal paint? On your fences (you'll need a sign too) that shit never comes off clothes.

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