I hate my job AIBU?

[cricketmum84]

So I've done the same job but in different companies for around 25 years. I have worked my arse off to get to the level I'm at, I've done a degree to qualify myself above other candidates, worked in some well known companies etc.
Last year I developed anxiety and depression and I don't know how much this has to do with my feelings but thought I should throw it in there!
I just absolutely hate my job at the moment. Hate it. I've gone from a management role in a small company to a specialist role (non management) in a huge household name. They expect the Earth and I get spoken to like a trainee even though people know I'm most qualified and more experienced.
I just don't know what to do, the last 2 places I've worked make me feel like I don't want to do this job anymore. I've lost all passion for it which is sad. But I don't know what I would do?? Also I'm throwing away my qualifications and experience to start all over again?
What would you do in this position?? Honestly?

Sorry 15 years not 25!!! I'm not old enough lol!

Sounds like you've outgrown the job and need a new challenge

So you need a plan! The sooner you make a plan the more incontrol you'll feel.

It's hard to make a plan when you don't know what you want to do

I would love to work with animals but I just don't think we could cope with the salary drop? It feels really selfish for me to consider dropping maybe £20k a year just so I can be "happy at work"!

DH had a career change a couple of years ago and dropped a similar amount of salary. He could only do this because I had increased my salary through promotions and studying. I think I might be a bit jealous of him slipping off to work all happy and carefree.

I'm just gonna have to suck it up aren't I?

No you're not. I did a year out to retrain and am on 50% more than where I was after 4 years. Trust yourself. Believe in yourself.

Why can't you just start applying for jobs in a different company. You must have enjoyed it at one time, especially as you studied for further qualifications! Working with animals is low paid, probably because everyone wants to do it. Even vets aren't particularly well paid (unless you're Noel Fitzpatrick of course), and the work is physically hard.

I'm keeping an eye on job boards but with a bit of a heavy heart.
I read a book recently and a character said "every promotion is a step further away from what you love about the job" and that is SO right! Without giving too much away my profession is quite specialised and involves a lot of laws and legislation. This is where I excel. I'm crap at people management and hated being a manager in a big company where my role just involved overseeing a timetable and managing absence. Whereas in a small company where I could get stuck in with the nitty gritty yet still be "in charge" I was happy!

Is there any way you can go freelance? My aunt did this, after feeling similarly to you and having done a degree, qualified, promoted a number of times, bigger and bigger companies etc, she was worried about getting enough work etc, but now earns more than she did and picks the jobs she wants on a consultancy basis often for SMEs, her work life is more flexible and she's back to more direct work our project oversight rather than hr management and feeling like a tiny cog in a huge mechanism

It sounds like you don't like the big corporate culture where you currently are and would prefer to work somewhere smaller where you have more autonomy again. It might be worth trying to change your job accordingly first before considering a major career change.

where I could get stuck in with the nitty gritty yet still be "in charge" I was happy!

I was going to ask you what you liked and did not like about the job, but your analysis shows that you are very clear about this. One way forward for you, your plan if you like, would be to set out your criteria for your ideal version of your role and start researching all the organisations which might suit you. Add to that, more informal information, by talking to people in the industry to find which match your criteria.

Keep asking people for who you might talk to, asking them what they value about the organisation and where they see if going in the future: its easier to ask that than say 'i want a new role'. Your fifteen years of experience will mean that the right organisation will already be looking out for someone like you.

Your really focussed networking will help you unearth the right role. You will also feel better about yourself when you are actively looking for what you want, rather than putting up with a job to pay the bills. All the best

Was in a simar ace and after 3 different jobs that made me feel stressed and unhappy, I convinced myself that I was in the wrong industry and started to look into retraining despite worry about how to fund it and the fact I would have to restart on lower income.

In the meantime took a temporary role in same industry and I don't feel half as disheartened. The job isn't stressful like the others, people are lovely, much better culture, focus of the role a bit more interesting and suddenly I feel the industry is not that bad after all. I don't have the passion I once had but I don't hate the job and I'm finding that it is OK.

Ugh another day. Actually had a dream last night that I totally sacked today off, didn't tell anyone I wasn't going in and went to Skegness for the day instead 😂 still kinda tempted!

In all seriousness thanks for the advice, I'm going to look into going freelance today, I also quite fancy the education side so that's something else to think about!