AIBU?
To ask how to make everyone equally pissed off with me?
EqualityofDiscontent · 24/09/2018 19:04
Live abroad, DC just started 3 weeks of half-term. A while ago, my parents mentioned they were planning to visit. They hadn't booked anything so we suggested a mutual meeting place so we could holiday together. This was refused and we heard nothing more. In the meantime, DH has a job offer meaning he has had to take most of his holiday before he finishes, leaving him two days he can take over the next three weeks. We assumed my parents wouldn't be coming as we heard nothing more. ............................................................. Today, I was told they are going to X place (a resort 2.5 hours away) for 5 nights inc weekend and then to Y place (city 1 hour away) for 2 nights. They "hope we can join them". ..................................................................... DH doesn't want to go to X, he said that the last time they said they would come over (and didn't actually come in the end). He also wants to see DC at weekend as he doesn't during the week. ..............................,,,,......................... Parents have said I can take DC for whole time they are in X and DH can join at weekend. They didn't ask, nor see the need to discuss it with us. I also have to work in between, but work are v. flexible! .......................................................................How can I make everyone equally unhappy and pissed off with me? ..................................................................... If I take DC to X Saturday afternoon, returning Monday morning. Then agree to meet in Y one day. Does that seem a reasonable compromise?
Singlenotsingle · 24/09/2018 19:08
The standard MN response to that is "sorry, that doesn't work for me/us". It all seems much too complicated.
ExFury · 24/09/2018 19:08
Do what suits you, your DH and your DC. Your parents should have discussed it with you. Id take your DC to X for a couple of days midweek when your DH is working if it fits in wuth your work. Then when they are in Y they can come to you for the day. Why are you travelling hours instead of them actually coming to see you?
EqualityofDiscontent · 24/09/2018 19:16
Id take your DC to X for a couple of days midweek when your DH is working ...........................................................they arrive in X thurs leave Tuesday. I work Tues in office so have to be home latest Monday lunch. Rest of hours I can work from home as I want in holidays. ............................................................ Last time they stayed near us, I suggested a day trip to Y. They kicked up such a fuss that I expected them to either use the train or drive extra when they'd travelled so far to see us. So I think we'd have to go to Y rather than them come to us.
TwoOddSocks · 24/09/2018 19:18
I agree with PP do what works for you, DH and DC. Parents are welcome to make the 1 hour (or 2.5 hour) trip to see you.
CloudCaptain · 24/09/2018 19:26
They're not really in the country to see you though are they? If they wanted to see you they would stay in your home city. Just tell them you didn't realise they were coming and have already made plans for the whole holiday. (make up holiday camps for the kids). Their high handed nonsense would totally piss me off.
RangeRider · 24/09/2018 19:46
Your order of priority is - you, then DH, then DC, then anyone else. If you have pets then it's you, pets, DH, DC etc. (With cats it's probably cats, you, DH etc!) 'Sorry, we assumed you weren't bothering after all so we've made other plans'
EqualityofDiscontent · 24/09/2018 20:27
No, no pets thank god! That's what I think, if they were coming to see us, then they'd have asked us what was more practical (stay near us, DC want time at home). It seems that they just want to tell people they've been to see us... and we ruined their holiday by not making the DC available 24/7.
MaryandMichael · 24/09/2018 20:29
Don't let them mess with your head. Certainly don't run around after them. Let them say what they like.
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