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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To have this for my ds party?

33 replies

AnotherManicMumday · 24/09/2018 10:03

My ds is 6 at the end of November. For his party I'm thinking of inviting a few of his friends to some caverns locally where they see Father Christmas in a grotto in the cave, get a present, some cake and a drink then get to explore the cavern.
There's a few things I'm unsure about though...
Due to where it is, I wouldn't be able to provide party food.
Would parents mind their child seeing Father Christmas at the start of December and potentially without them there to see it?
I'd pay for the guests plus party bag but wibu to say if parents or siblings want to come along, they are welcome to but they pay for themselves? (£6.50ph)

OP posts:
GiveMeAllTheGin8 · 24/09/2018 10:08

I don't know op, I would like to do a Christmas experience with my own kids and also I think it make take away from your sons birthday?
And having no food either?
Is it an outside event? It could be freezing, raining and you would be stuck with a load of cold children!

Andtheresaw · 24/09/2018 10:11

It's a family thing tbh.

Original poster
AnotherManicMumday · 24/09/2018 10:12

It's in the caverns so cold but not in the rain and not freezing if dressed appropriately. Cake and drinks would be in the cafe. I could provide food from there but would be difficult if cafe is full or there's alot of us

OP posts:
Shednik · 24/09/2018 10:12

Our school does it. And the panto.
I'be always been slightly miffed because I want to share these things with my children.

Pissedoffdotcom · 24/09/2018 10:15

My DD would love that. Tbh it wouldn't bother me her seeing santa without us, she sees him several times on top of our family trip anyway! If you make it clear about the food issue it shouldn't be a problem either imo

TidyDancer · 24/09/2018 10:15

It sounds like a lovely idea, but I don't think it's appropriate for a party. That's a family activity really.

Original poster
AnotherManicMumday · 24/09/2018 10:15

I might message the parents and ask if they mind plus they are welcome to come and watch. It's difficult for parties at that time of year due to weather and because so many places have Christmas events on, they don't cater for parties

OP posts:
Hillarious · 24/09/2018 10:15

Depends on what myths have been concocted around the issue of Father Christmas amongst the children who will be attending. For us, Father Christmas is a deal, but not a big deal.

Original poster
AnotherManicMumday · 24/09/2018 10:17

Due to school/Christmas fairs etc ds ends up seeing around 6 Father Christmases a year!

OP posts:
Hoppinggreen · 24/09/2018 10:18

My dc both have birthdays close we to Christmas and I always differentiate the 2 so I would never had a Christmas themed party for them
Also, when my dc were the same age as yours we did Santa as a family day out so I would have preferred them not to have already done it with someone else

TwoOddSocks · 24/09/2018 10:19

I'd be happy enough for my DS to go to this. If there is no food there make sure you make it clear in advance. There are some people who are very particular about their father christmas experiences though - one big visit a year with Grandma, aunty X and cousins etc with big photo shoot so they might not be happy.

TruffleShuffles · 24/09/2018 10:21

My friend did this for her December birthday most years we all loved it and no parents had any issues at all. It was brilliant that we all got presents at someone else’s birthday!

Strawberrymelon · 24/09/2018 10:22

My ds would have been excited to do that for a friend's birthday at that age.

Theg00dwife · 24/09/2018 10:25

That sounds really lovely. They’ll have a great time.

Asterado · 24/09/2018 10:26

My birthday is close to Christmas. I would have been royally pissed off if my birthday activity was actually a Christmas activity.

Totally happy to accept I am and have always been an unreasonable child though Grin

Wolfiefan · 24/09/2018 10:28

I wouldn’t do a Christmas thing for a birthday.

diddl · 24/09/2018 10:31

Are the caverns doable without Santa?

IthinkIsawahairbrushbackthere · 24/09/2018 10:31

It never occurred to me it could be a problem. My son's birthday is the week before Christmas. When he was 4 we had a party with tea and Father Christmas came with presents for everyone.

A few days later the same Father Christmas was roped in for the playgroup Christmas party. All the playgroup had been at the party. Father Christmas had an amazing memory for names and so instead of calling the children out for their presents he went round and delivered them. Even though FC was a close family member that we saw regularly my son had no idea at all.

Awwlookatmybabyspider · 24/09/2018 10:31

It's a fab idea. However I think at the same time putting a Christmas focus on it sort of takes the shine of his Birthday.

Original poster
AnotherManicMumday · 24/09/2018 10:32

The Christmas thing would be maybe 20 mins of the party then they'd get an hour or so in the cave and 30 mins for cake and to look round the visitor centre. My ds loves sharing and would love that his friends get a present too. I know most of the parents well enough to ask if it's ok before sending out invites so will probably do that and will make it clear parents are welcome to come along. Thanks everyone

OP posts:
ShadowHuntress · 24/09/2018 10:33

I wouldn’t mind this sounds like a lovely idea. My kids usually end up seeing about 5 Santa’s by the time Christmas is actually here! Just ask the parents first If it’s ok

Allineedyoutodois · 24/09/2018 10:39

Depends on the families, - a friend took our DC to a special santa thing as company for her only child, a whole half day, big production thing and we didn't care or take them again to santa so wouldn't mind but it's a really big deal for the peeps who like to do the whole experience or winter wonderland type thing.

Lalliella · 24/09/2018 10:53

My DCs would have absolutely loved that at that age, I would have seen it as a great idea. Can you confer with the parents of the kids you would invite?

TeenTimesTwo · 24/09/2018 10:57

I think:
a) Some parents will mind. You only have to read threads here about how protective some people feel about their Christmas traditions
b) I think you should keep birthday and Christmas separate for the sake of your DS. Why should his birthday treat be seeing Father Christmas? That should be his Christmas treat.

JessicaJonesJacket · 24/09/2018 10:58

Sorry OP but I wouldn't like it because we always see Santa as a family. Plus asking the parents puts them in the difficult position of denying their DC a party just because they have a Christmas tradition.