To speak to teacher?

[Fuzzywig]

I am not sure what is going on at school.

My 13 year old suffers with anxiety and is feeling stressed because a girl she thought was a friend keeps lying about her. We had this last year when said ex-friend was spreading rumours about my daughter saying she had said lies and hurtful things about her. In one lesson exfriend ran out of the class in tears - my daughter hadn’t even spoken or looked at her.

Now she is spreading more rumours this time that my daughter has slapped her across the face amounts other things.

My daughter was shouted at by a teacher the other day who believed the other girl because she was crying and making accusations. She didn’t listen to my daughter or another pupil who was there and witnessed what had happened.

I am at an absolute loss as to what I should do I have never come across this sort of behaviour before.

My daughter is upset and wants me to speak to their teacher. We tried to ignore and not react last year.

You could ask them to move her groups so they aren't together. This is fairly common in my school when there are considerable fallings out in friendship groups unfortunately it might mean your daughter ends up Ina class where she doesn't know many people.

She wants to move groups so she can ‘escape’ from her.

She was so upset when the teacher didn’t give her a chance to explain or believe her.

I didn’t think it was common I thought it was quite manipulative to be honest. I can’t understand why someone would tell such lies trying to influence mutual friends.

My daughter has a learning disability and everything is very black and white with her. I had advised her to ignore and try and be friends. She said she can’t do that and never wants to speak to her again.

I think you should speak to the school. Your daughter has not had a fair hearing and her "friend" does sound very manipulative. Give them your daughter's side of the story.

Thanks Daffodils I think I need to

Talk to the school but ask for their support in keeping them separate in lessons rather than accusing the teacher. This isn't a forgive and forget matter and you need to advise your DD to stay away from this girl. I dont know why you would want to encourage a friendship between someone who treats your DD this way.

I wasn’t trying to support or force a friendship I was trying to advise her to be a bit fake to try and keep this girl on side. My daughter can’t do it she makes it known she doesn’t want to be friends as she no longer trusts her.

A similar thing happened to me. A girl was lying about me bullying her for attention. In the end, the Head of Year threatened to remove me from my form group and keep my separate from all other forms for the rest of my time under him (was year 9 at the time). This was after my form tutor stuck up for me and said one fantasy scenario had happened the exact opposite to what she claimed (she said I got older girls to threaten her when my form tutor had to rescue me from older girls she'd sent after me).

It took my mum getting involved and ripping apart their handling of the situation for it to stop.

Get involved before it escalates.

Jeez English that’s awful.

I am absolutely rubbish at anything like this.

Apparently I have to write a letter so I will be cobbling something together tonight.

Any suggestions/advice gratefully received.