To not follow tradition ... ?

[Mellodrama]

I have never taken cakes / sweets in for my either of my DC's class when it's been their birthday, but I'm getting mixed comments re this on my fb!

I honestly don't understand the 'tradition' of doing so, and therefore, wondering whether IABU to not do so?

Do others in the class bring them in, and if so, do your DCs not take a sweet or cake when others bring them in?

I've never done that...surely if there is to be a class "party" shouldn't the classmates bring in treats to treat the birthday boy/girl....?

This only happens in my dd’s Class when they maybe didn’t have a party or not a whole class party. It isn’t that usual. Occasional bags of haribo. I wouldn’t get into it personally

It’s just sharing a treat in celebration.

I’d join if the whole class does it, don’t forget this is your dc’s community and socially it’s important to take part and fit in. Does your dc want to take part?

Save your battles for the truly ridiculous stuff that will crop up.

I participate because it makes my children feel good to share some treats on their birthday. It costs very little and they enjoy it.

Last birthday the youngest took in a bag of lollies. Cost me about £2 and he was totally chuffed.

I'd participate if your DC are happy to take the treats other kids bring in.

It's only reasonable if you do let your kids have them when other parents provide them.

I let my children take sweets in. Their friends can share their celebration, my DDs feel happy and it costs so little.

Does your child participate in the tradition when other children bring in sweets/cakes?

It’s a small enough thing, children love it when they can share a treat with their classmates.

who is commenting and why?! this seems bizarre to me

Our local primary school does not allow it.

Some kids have allergies, some parents may not want their children having sugary cakes.

@garbagegirl Why on earth would my post seem bizarre to you?! Ffs, too many of you mn's too paranoid on here re trolls!!

Sorry to disappoint you, but genuine post!

I have never followed this tradition - I'm asking whether IABU for not doing so?

Not unreasonable. A bit mean maybe.

What I meant was it seems bizarre that people are commenting on social media about your decision to be too tight to bring in sweets/cakes for your kid to hand out on their birthday? Your decision, why is it open to comment and why would they know or care?

I send a box of sweets in on my children's birthdays.

It's your child's birthday. If sharing sweets and cake on birthdays is encouraged/ normal at school and your child wants to do it then just do it. It's not about you/ your principles/ your preferences, it's about your child's friendships and not being the kid whose mum is too tight to buy cake.
If not many other people do it and your child isn't bothered then yanbu.
Check the rules with the teacher, though.

You might be unreasonable if everyone else does it because your dc benefits and takes a treat but you don’t give back. If nobody does it, then you aren’t unreasonable. So far, you haven’t said.

Is it really worth the battle? Let your DC takes treats in and figure out it feels good to give to other people. Not the worst life lesson disguised as cake.

It's always fun for the birthday kid, it's that one special day to shine.But do you not do anything for them at school at all?Or is it the sugar issue.If you just don't at all I'd like to suggest to start.It doesn't have to be big, just something to make them feel special.Because before you know it, they won't be kids anymore.If it's sugar..Do fruit kabobs!Get the big long wood skewers and fill them up with fruit.The kids usually pick those over the sugary stuff at class parties!

*Or, continue doing what works for you and your children😊