I am a 26 year old mother of two and I’ve always been absolutely petrified of the dark, everything to do with it. Cannot sleep on the dark, cannot walk alone in the dark, cannot have my blinds or curtains open when it’s dark etc etc. I’ve just accepted that’s me.
I’m not sure where my fear comes from exactly. I think it’s a mix of things. Being a complete wimp about things in general. I also have some weird childhood memories. My mum was in an abusive relationship. I remember waking to my grandparents house with my mum in the pitch black after they had a row. Another time also at my grandparents I had woke up to a pitch black room. There was a lot of shouting and arguing downstairs. I was too scared to get up. I kept calling my mum but she couldn’t hear at first and when she did finally hear she kept saying ‘in a minute in a minute’. I remember feeling absolutely terrified. My mother never understood my fear. She was constantly turning my lamp off hoping I’d get over my fear and I’d wake up in the dark. It clearly didn’t help.
My partner just laughs at my fear. He’s accepted that lamp stays on now and sometimes he ends up DS’s bed when dS climbs in with me and sleeps in the pitch black. He’s always turning lights off when I’m in a room. Taking the p**s etc. He’s such an understanding partner in other ways but I don’t think he understands how a grown woman can be scared of the dark. But I am.. and I’m never gonna like the dark.
Earlier we had a power cut due to the bad weather. I was home alone as Oh dog sitting at his mums. I cried made worse by the fact I’d just being watching American horror story with little phone signal and low battery. Begged me other half to come home. He’s only dog sitting 5 Miles away and thought he could come home for a bit but he wouldn’t 😪 told me just to go sleep and not worry about it...