Help please oh great minds of mumsnet - child/teenage safety related

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Sorry I know this isn’t an aibu but I really need some help for a teenage girl who’s in a stick situation.
There are lots of details I don’t know but will answer as much as I can.
The situation is a 16 (nearly 17) year old girl who ran away from home.

We gave her shelter, sorted out clothes, worked with school to replace books and liaised with the police and social services. Family was previously referred to and had a home meeting with a social worker. No further action taken and I don’t know why they were referred in the first place.

Step father appears controlling and coercive. Police advised the girl contact her step father, which she did (unfortunately via the mobile we gave her) He then persuaded her to go somewhere she couldn’t be overheard while having a conversation with her. After about 90 minutes on the phone she agreed to stay temporarily at a relatives home.

Step father has now told her there’s a residency order in place forcing her to stay in the family until she’s 18. Also saying all sorts of other things like she’l Never see her half siblings again if she’s co operates with SS, police etc. We too have have had pressure put on us to not contact or speak to school, Ss, police etc. That’s supposedly coming from her but sounds nothing like a 16 yr old would say- phrasing etc is all much older.
So I’m hoping you can help out with some information please.
Is it possible for the girl, or us, to find out if there’s a residency order in place and up to 18 instead of 16. Due to the time her mother and step father got together I think it’s residency and not a child arrangement order.
And if there is an order in place, how difficult would it be for the girl to overturn the order once she turns 17.

Its not clear what role you have had relative to ss/authorities? Did you just 'take her in' to help her out?

She’s my son’s girlfriend and when she ran away it was to us she ran.
As she’s sixteen we notified police and SS that she was with us. She expressed clearly she didn’t want to return home and told her mother over the phone that she didn’t want to see her or speak any further to her at that time.

Why not get the young lady to ring theme designated SW or SS and ask?

I personally think that the SF is lying as if any order was in place why tell her not to cooperate with the Police and SS.

My understanding is that a 16yo can please herself. My contact and residence orders ceased when DD turned 16.

Hi there. Lucky for her that she has such concerned support form someone outside the family!

I know from my work for a children's charity that a child can legally leave home at 16. I also know that for many issues, there is a real grey area in relation to the rights of children who are between 16 and 18, but I don't believe a 16 year old would be forced in the way you describe. I also think that, for such an Order to be obtained, the child would have been consulted pretty heavily by, for example, social services/CAFCASS and the like.

I doubt there is an Order. But I would go back to the police and SS, as i think your post says you have spoken to them already. They may be able to find out more.

A note of caution: the girl sounds bullied, at least, and abused at worst. She is clearly being emotionally blackmailed. Encouraging her to talk to someone (ideally you, of course, but she may see this as 'not allowed' or be fearful of this given the bullying and what she's been told) might help? Childline are a great resource, can give practical advice too. And I wonder if looking at, for example, a Women's rights site, to see that what is happening to her is in fact abusive, might help. Children in abusive families often think the behaviour they have experienced is 'normal' and it may take her some time to understand that it's not. It sounds like you are doing a fantastic job of modelling that the pressure put on her is unfair and unreasonable. I take my hat off to you OP

I'd say is almost certainly a load of BS. Very hard to legally make a 16yr old live somewhere. She would need to be consulted, she hasn't, so sounds like the SF is bullying her (again possibly). If she's not happy at the relative's house then perhaps she can stay with you again. Or set up a safety code that means she'd like to come back to you.