...to be unsure about our childminder?

[stiltonontoast]

DS had his first full day with the childminder last week, he is only going to be there one day a week but it’s a long day 8am til 5.30pm. I’ve met her, checked out her house and seen her with the children she cares for. She seems fine, if a little loud and brash (we are quite a quiet, chilled family) on our first meeting she explained how my son would have a daily diary online she’d fill in to keep me updated.

On the day i received no updates or photos, had to text her to check everything was ok - and got a pretty generic response. Our son had been constipated up until the point he went to her, but i forgot to mention it. When DH picked him up she said that he’d done a normal poo around midday - considering he hadn’t pooed normally for around a week (and when he had they’ve been like rocks and certainly couldn’t be considered normal) or a few days after I find it a bit hard to believe. She also said he’d barely napped - 30 mins at most, whereas he usually has/needs 3 hours a day at least.

She also sent DS home with food all over his face and clothes - imagine if you just didn’t clean a 6 month olds face after eating and left it to dry - that.

I’m just getting a bad feeling about her. Am I overreacting? The dirty face thing really bothers me - it’s basic hygiene surely?

Absolutely don't send him back. Food all over his face is a lack of very basic care.

Trust your gut instinct.

The nap thing is normal. My DDs would sleep 2-3 hours a day at home but never at nursery.

Not having washed his face though, that's not on at all.

I'm not a huge fan of childminders tbh. I'm sure there are some fabulous ones but there are also ones like PP mentioned.

Could you use a nursery? I find nurseries are more heavily regulated than childminders.

Trust your instinct. If you don't feel right about it it probably isn't.

@Onlyfools iv always told my DH if I won the lotto id buy a big house and become a child minder! Would love to run around with toddlers all day and know mums can go to work happy 😆

Trust your gut. Our childminder is amazing, I trust her completely. That's what you need.

My childminder was so great that she remains the final emergency contact for my late teenage children, who she hasn't minded for about half a decade! A really good one is extraordinary, a not so good one...not.

Could you use a nursery? I find nurseries are more heavily regulated than childminders.

Nurseries and childminders are subject to the same regulatory body (OFSTED) and both are required to follow the EYFS.

OP, speak to your childminder first and foremost. So many issues can be resolved by simply talking. Let her know you're not happy about the lack of updates, tell her that you're doubtful he had a poo (he might have though, DS has chronic constipation and inevitably will go for his once-a-week shit at school or at my mum's house when I'm not there), ask why he still had food on his face at pick up. The not napping or only napping for a short time is usual for childcare, especially when they first start, but see what she has to say about the other issues and then decide where to go from there. If you're satisfied with her responses then great. If not then start looking elsewhere for alternative childcare, don't forget to check your contract for any stipulations about notice periods.

My mum was a childminder and my sister is also a childminder. They both took/take their jobs incredibly seriously, and the children were beautifully looked after. However when i went back to work after having my DD and looked for a CM... there werent many good ones around.

Pooing and naps are one thing, but who can't be arsed to wipe a grubby face? Doesnt sound good to me.

Nurseries and childminders are subject to the same regulatory body (OFSTED) and both are required to follow the EYFS

Yes, I'm aware of this. However, due to the hierarchical nature of how nurseries are run (owner, manager, staff), I think it is far more obvious if standard start to slip than if one person is responsible. They have more clients, so word of mouth can spread faster so more incentive to maintain standards.

How often do OFSTED actually inspect? Not often at all! So far easier for childminder standards to slip.

Like I said, there are fantastic childminders of thy I have no doubt, but I think it's far easier for their standards to be lower than nurseries and remain unnoticed.

Completely agree with greenmeerkat.