To take action over NDN parking dispute?

[HedgingWithASledgehog]

Long time lurker but I really need some advice this time. We share a driveway with our next door neighbour. They own the land but we both have the same covenants saying no parking - it is for access to properties only. The neighbours don't speak to us at all and actively look away if we speak (we don't know why) so we tend to just keep out of their way now.

Over many years they have objected if anyone stops for our house on the shared drive, even for a minute, and shout at whoever comes about it being "their driveway". Often the man will claim that he needs to go out that minute, get in his car, drive round the corner and back again. They quite often have deliveries or stop for long periods on the shared drive, which they are also not allowed to do. They are also obliged to maintain the drive, which they don't do either.

Today they have done it again and I am now at the end of my tether. My daughter has struggled to make friends at her new school but today a schoolfriend came over and when her grandmother came to pick her up, the poor lady didn't even make it out of the car before they both shouted at her, told her they had taken her registration number (!) and told her to move. The man did the round the corner driving trick again. I am angry because the poor lady was very upset and I am worried that the new friend won't be allowed to come here again.

I think I have 4 options:

1. ignore like we have always done, and feel sorry for their angry ways
2. go round and confront them - but we know the husband has a violent streak from previous encounters - or start tit for tat retaliation when they have visitors or deliveries
3. get our solicitor to write to them to remind them of what they can and can't do with the driveway
4. start making a note of all these events and speak to the police about harassment.

I always used to think that options 3 and 4 were too extreme but I have had it this time so rethinking.

3 and 4, I think. Distance yourself, and in the meantime maybe remind your visitors to park elsewhere until this is sorted? You poor thing, I'm in a similar position (but not as bad!!).

5. move house (if you can) as that sounds like he’ll on earth

Yeah, 3 or 4.

The police probably won't actually do anything unless they physically break something or punch someone. Getting a solicitors letter out to shit them up a bit though.

*ought! Sorry

Thanks - good to know I'm not getting this out of proportion. We really don't want to move - we've just got the house the way we want it - but otherwise option 5 might be good!

Be careful about formalising anything as you would have to disclose it if you want to sell

Shared access is pretty much on the line though, so in this case could be a 'foreseeable' for disclosure...

Let us know OP how you get it sorted, and good luck!

Good point about declaring it if we wanted to sell. But they have put their house on the market about a year ago (then took it off again) and we have no plans to move for many years - so would it be more of a problem to them than us? I was hoping it might encourage them to do the right thing so we could at some point agree that the dispute was resolved?

Option 5: say ‘we’re glad you e been reminding us of your ownership of the drive, as there’s some maintenance that’s due’.

Or Option 6: start dropping round little gifts of flowers and asking them over for afternoon tea and suggesting shared BBQs, followed by group relaxation and hypnotherapy sessions to ‘restore the peaceful karma of our beautiful shared family retreats and shared driveway’. That should freak them out sufficiently to back off at a rate of knots without a conflict for you to report 😂

Use the fact that they want to sell to get them to back off.

Send a letter that outlines the law, what you need to happen (and cease happening). Write politely, and include a good paragraph on how you’d like to resolve this quickly and quietly, before it becomes necessary to take the kind of action that makes future house sales difficult.

Personally, I’d do the drive maintenance myself, with a full family participation working-bee, to reclaim some moral ground. If they come out shouting, say pleasantly ‘oh, we didn’t think you were aware of your legal responsibilities regarding this driveway. What schedule for maintenance did YOU have in mind?’

visitorthedog A nudist group sit in on the driveway might work quicker :p

I like your idea

These are some fabulous ideas! And making me laugh after a stressful day

@themaddhugger I love it! A nudist festival to celebrate its car free future ‘DriveStock’ 😂