To regret this wedding invitation for sat before Christmas

[Lydiaatthebarre]

I heard yesterday that I'm going to be invited to a wedding the Saturday before Christmas. Former colleague that I've stayed in touch with.

There's a tradition in my family that we all get together that day, take the kids ice skating, have lunch (with hot chocolate for the kids) then put up the tree in my mother's house and go to the carol service in the town square.

It's one of the highlights of Christmas for me and I would hate to miss it. AIBU to want to regret the invite and spend the day with my family? She's a good friend but not a hugely close one.

Unless the Carol service is in the evening, that is.

I'm not sure what you mean by regretting it, though. You didn't send it, what have you got to regret?

It's pretty clear that OP means sending her regrets for declining the invitation, from the context of her post.

You already have other plans. I think anyone booking a wedding so close to Christmas needs to accept that people will already have made plans with family.

I love a christmas wedding, if she's a close friend is there not a way of moving your family plans to the Sunday? Obviously if your not bothered at going then dont worry.

Don't think at the moment this is a case of one or the other.

FWIW I would be hurt if someone didn't attend my wedding for lunch at their mum's house. But I guess you're not close any more.

There’s absolutely nothing wrong with declining an invitation. As long as you let them know and don’t mess them around

"FWIW I would be hurt if someone didn't attend my wedding for lunch at their mum's house. But I guess you're not close any more."
No need to say why, that's nothing to do with the bride. Just politely reply that you can't make it. Jeez!

It's not lunch at my mum's house though. It's a day with family including a lunch out and an evening carol service.

It's ok to send regrets, and as other posters have said she's probably expecting a number of people to not accept the invite.

If you're keen to keep in touch with the colleague send a lovely card and small, thoughtful gift. Arrange to meet up after the wedding and see photos etc. Don't miss the family thing though. There aren't that many christmases when the kids are young - enjoy it!