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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To say new GP was vile towards me?

116 replies

chattoaspanishgirl · 15/09/2018 11:46

I couldn't see my regular GP so I had to visit what's called a locum Dr, I think they're GP's that are temporarily there.

Anyway, I went in because I needed some more Naproxen and mine is due to run out. I ended up going in my wheelchair because I physically cannot walk at the moment. I can't even use my crutches. I have to be helped in and out of the shower, I can't lift my arms up to put a jumper on... you get the idea.

I remember the conversion word for word. I came away feeling pathetic and useless.

He beamed at me and said "Helloo!"

Then he said "Oh no, what happened, why are you in a wheelchair? Had a fall?"

I said no, it's just my joints are incredibly stiff and I have muscle weakness. I can't walk.

He laughed and said of course you can! Have you tried ibuprofen?

I said yes, that didn't help. And no, I can't walk. I then went on to say I'd come for more Naproxen but it's on observation since it can cause stomach ulcers, and I have been coming in every so often to see my GP after a few repeats.

He said he wasn't sure I needed it, but he'd hand it over if I was certain I hadn't tried anything else to manage it Hmm

He then saw I was on tramadol and very vocally said "Tramadol!"

I said yes, for pain. He said I can't see why they've given you this. For Fibromyalgia? No no no. I think this needs reviewing.

I could quite literally feel myself welling up with tears. That medication is also under review but it's the only thing that takes the edge of some days, when things are simply unbearable.

Long story short, I came away with my prescription feeling pathetic and useless. As I went to leave, he said "should I open the door or will you stand and do it yourself? Wink"

He had a lot of so called 'banter'

AIBU to feel so cross, or am I being sensitive? I really can never tell these days. I pass so much judgement it usually never phases me. But this feels like outright belittlement.

I just don't know what to think Sad

OP posts:
endofthelinefinally · 15/09/2018 11:48

How rude and unkind.
I would speak to the practice manager.
That is awful.

RomyAndJulio · 15/09/2018 11:48

“should I open the door or will you stand and do it yourself?”

I’m pretty shocked at that. It’s completely passive aggressive, not at all what I would expect from a health care professional.

Bluelady · 15/09/2018 11:49

Poor you. I'd be upset too. I'd be pretty pissed off if I were your usual GP and another doctor was questioning the treatment I'd prescribed. I'd definitely be declining another appointment with him.

Original poster
chattoaspanishgirl · 15/09/2018 11:49

Romy he didn't come across as aggressive, just very outspoken and overly 'bantery'

OP posts:
MorningsEleven · 15/09/2018 11:50

He's a knobhead. Definitely request a meeting with the Practice Manager.

Redken24 · 15/09/2018 11:51

I wouldn't have said it was banter.
I don't have the same condition's as you but if I seen a gp who had been disparaging I would definitely complain.

Claw001 · 15/09/2018 11:51

Yanbu what a dick!

Complain.

LoveAGoodChat · 15/09/2018 11:53

Op you should speak to the practice manager...just because he is a dr does not give him the right to speak to you that way or make you feel like he made you feel,

Plus as you said, he is a locum dr , he hadn't seen you before so how can he say you can walk or you don't need your medications when you obviously do otherwise your regular dr wouldn't have prescribed them for you in the first place...

Op do say something to the practice manager so that his behaviour is nipped in the bid, it can be daunting seeing a new dr when you have ongoing health conditions, without the dr acting like he did..

Quangot · 15/09/2018 11:53

What a rude person. It isn't a "joke" or "banter" to imply someone is exaggerating their problems, and talk over them. Let alone a GP! I also wonder whether he'd have said the same to a man.

LoveAGoodChat · 15/09/2018 11:54

*nipped in the bud

MaisyPops · 15/09/2018 11:54

I wouldn't say that's banter at all. It's unprofessional and uncalled for.

ChangerChangerson · 15/09/2018 11:57

You need to complain. The way you were treated is apauling.

My DH has had to be on naproxen and tramadol for pain relief in the past and you don't just go on them willynilly so you obviously need them considering your regular GP prescribed them to you.

GertrudeCB · 15/09/2018 11:58

Good god, that is awful and he is a twunt.

I too have a chronic pain condition and my heart sinks if I don't see my regular GP - my medication regime has been fine tuned over years and works for me .
FlowersBrewCake from me and I hope you report him.

crosstalk · 15/09/2018 12:01

OP you're being very generous. Clearly there are issues round tramadol and I believe GPs have been tasked with checking prescriptions esp long-running ones, but that doesn't excuse banter suggesting you shouldn't need it/are faking it. Do speak to the practice manager as you've spoken to MN - s/he will know what to do about it.

ScattyCharly · 15/09/2018 12:03

Don’t see this GP again

VeryBerrySeptember · 15/09/2018 12:05

I'm so sorry you had that response from a health professional.

Sounds like he maybe has bumptious healthy person syndrome with that extra sheen of professional knowitall arrogance.
You would hope doctors would have both more compassion and better " bedside manners". But it's often not so.

Littlebluebird123 · 15/09/2018 12:05

I'm sorry that this happened.

It's hard to tell from what you've described but as you've said he was full of banter it seems there is a doubt in your mind about whether he was rude or not. However, I think he was rude, even if he meant it differently.
Banter, imo, only really works if you are on an even footing ie friends, or if you and gp are on good terms. (For example your regular gp and you may engage in a little banter as you have a previous level of trust.)
He may well have been trying to create a friendly atmosphere in which to discuss things but he has fallen very short. I think that you should mention it/write to the manager. Our practise often has people on placements as the locums and they are still training so it may be that, in which case it's all the more important that he learns how to get it right.
He is right to consider your medication (tramadol in particular as it's so addictive) but as you'd already said it was under review it should then have been a case of arranging another appointment with your regular gp to discuss rather than someone who doesn't know the things you've already tried etc.
Please don't let this get you down though.

Ollivander84 · 15/09/2018 12:06

YANBU. My usual GP loaded me with pain relief for my back as she knows I have a high threshold. A&E were HmmConfused at what I was on as I was still crying in pain until they did an MRI and then they couldn't give me enough morphine

Ollivander84 · 15/09/2018 12:07

And people don't bloody think
I was raving about a physio I went to who was great and someone interrupted me to say well she can't have been that good if she didn't fix you
NO DICKHEAD, she spotted the emergency and referred me, of course I still have pain because I'm now minus a shock absorber in my SPINE Angry
Off track but that's been bugging me all day Grin

recklessruby · 15/09/2018 12:08

What a complete knob. Complain.

LannieDuck · 15/09/2018 12:14

Doctors are just people; some you'll get on with and some you won't. They all have different styles - some can be the 'I know best' variety, and others will take a more collaborative approach. I guess some are douches ;)

I'm quite pushy about my medical care, and over the years have refused to see two or three GPs. However, on the flip side there have been wonderful GPs who I've deliberately booked even though the wait was longer. There's only been one doctor who made me cry, and it was at a vulnerable point in my life so I didn't put in a complaint. I wish I had.

I would definitely write to the practice manager, and maybe ask for a note to be put on your records that you don't want any further contact with the GP (would be needed if random GPs review repeat prescriptions etc). It's quite reasonable to decline to see him anymore.

Rosemary46 · 15/09/2018 12:19

It’s not banter, its rude and unprofessional.

Please complain to the practice manager.

I’m sorry you went though this, i would have been in tears too. When you are living with pain and disability, small things can push you over the edge and affect your mood for days and your confidence for weeks.

Babdoc · 15/09/2018 12:23

One wonders if he’s a locum because no practice ever wanted to employ him as a permanent GP!
Sadly, OP, there are good and bad doctors just as there are good and bad plumbers or whatever.
However, a complaint to the practice manager will trigger discussion of his behaviour and hopefully be documented for his annual appraisal and five yearly validation with the GMC.
Do it not only for yourself but for all his future patients, who deserve better treatment than this.

MovingThisYearHopefully · 15/09/2018 12:23

What an arse. Totally unacceptable. As for Naproxen, do be careful with it, it permanently damaged my stomach after only a few months & didn't help my pain anyway. It is vital you have stomach protection medication with it. I'd suggest not using it until you get some prescribed. Have you tried co-codamol & or muscle relaxants for your muscle stiffness? Personally, I don't find Tramadol works for me & co-codamol works better. Still don't have adequate pain relief though due to the problems you are having. Flowers

ChocolateWombat · 15/09/2018 12:25

I think it's often unsettling to see a different Dr when you have an on-going condition, with on-going medication that you both understand. When you see your regular Dr they know the backstory and why you have what you do.

A locum won't have the full backstory. On one hand it is their job to check and clarify the condition, so that they can prescribe accurately - it would be irresponsible to not do this. Sometimes it might be right to query the medication. However, a Locum should also be aware that people with ongoing conditions and medications will feel sensitive to suggestions of a different diagnosis or medication and tread gently with this. Perhaps you were overly sensitive to both what was being said and the manner it was spoken in, but the Locum should have been sensitive.

I don't actually think it warrants a complaint.

What it does remind me, is that when medicines need to be reviewed on an ongoing basis, it is always best to see your regular Dr who knows the backstory if your condition, which you have seen a nd what has been said and the prescribing plan. I know it's not always possible, but actually if I was seeing a Locum, I might restrict the chat about condition and prescription to the very minimum required at that time and say Inwould return to the regular Dr to discuss the rest.

I know these things often catch you unawares and you think of these things after, and can come out feeling a bit shell shocked about suggestions of a different diagnosis or medicines. Go and get an appointment with your regular Doctor, and talk it all through and perhaps mention in passing that you found the session with the Locum difficult.

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