AIBU to die inside a little bit every time I see 'could of'?

[MeetMeInMontauk]

Yep, it's another sanctimonious grammar-Nazi thread, so I'm going to get in early and tell all the bleeding heart virtue signallers who usually jump on these threads to do one, straight out of the gate. I'm interested in the experiences of others regarding what appears to be some sort of epidemic (at least on Facebook) or a near-ubiquitous grammatical blind spot in modern written English. For context, I live in an upcoming area of the SE but with an inescapably working class heritage and large council estate community, although this trend is by no means limited to the local FB community pages and is something that I see from even university-educated friends. How has 'could of' snuck in almost unremarked? Obviously as a corruption of the enunciation of the contraction 'could've' when spoken, but even then it makes no sense, if given even the slightest thought. Noone is saying, for example, 'Did you of one of my biscuits?', but the application of 'could of' seems almost universal in some circles. I accept that its contextual use means that nearly everyone involved understands the meaning and intent, but it's an inaccuracy that appears to be gaining continued traction. Does it make anyone else cringe, or do I just need to get back in my cage and chill the fuck out?

Placemaking

@KlutzyDraconequus

End sentance

Was that a deliberate mistake?

Your instead of you’re and “could of” drive me bananas. I know someone who does it all the time and has confessed she’s not confident in her grammar and I’ve checked and amended stuff for her but she still does it and I think it’s going to become accepted. It makes no sense either if you flip it round and said the opposite. “I could of done x, y, z” to “I of done “. Nobody would say that. It’s the sound of could’ve which has done it I think but drives me mad

I am married to a pedant, it's one of his more knobbish qualities, if I may use such a word.

OP - Obviously as a corruption of the enunciation of the contraction 'could've' when spoken, but even then it makes no sense, if given even the slightest thought. Noone is saying, for example, 'Did you of one of my biscuits?'

Can I just point out that your example re the biscuits is not equivalent usage. The verb "to have" has (see what I did there) 2 meanings:

1. possess, own, or hold
2. experience; undergo.

That said, you're absolutely correct. As are most of the pp's examples of crimes against SPAG.

I just feel pendants should set a good example in their pedantry 😁

Waits for someone to point out my glaringly obvious error..........

Perhaps it makes me look like a dick, but I for one won't idly sit by and watch the house burn down around me.

What is your plan, besides encouraging a point and laugh then? Will you be tackling the incorrect usage on social media directly? I'd love to hear how that goes.

Draws. Could of. Loose (instead of lose).

frayed hem. The grammar police used to be a feature on Mumsnet. Someone would post a harrowing account of domestic violence and the first response would be "it's "could have", not "could of". That habit seems to have fallen out of favour after a few "virtue signallers" called them out acting like a twat. Instead we get this sort of nobbish thread with increasing regularity. The thing is I do think grammar should be taught in schools. I just don't see why lording it over people with less than perfect grammar should be more socially acceptable than starting a thread about how someone's poor maths skills "make me die a little inside".

I died a little bit inside when I read
I live in an upcoming area of the SE

So you know each to there own.

" I've 3 children"
"I've a large garden"
"I've a good job"

The list goes on and on! It puts my teeth on edge. Why? Is it too much effort to insert the word have? It's one of my pet hates along with the expression ("I was gobsmacked!")

Anyone else wondering if the OP is actually Russel Brand after seeing all the BIG WORDS in their last post.

Sorry OP but you are coming across as pompous. You don’t write a blog by any chance 🤔

Longestlurker - yes!

Happymummy- your spelling of "could have" is correct. I'm a bit bemused as to how the poster who has told you that you say it correctly could possibly know without hearing you.

Try saying (in your normal voice) and quickly. Most people pronounce the two "haves" differently.
I have a dog
I could have had a dog.

'Snuck in ?' Really ?

YANBU. Also discrete instead of discreet, see it on here all the time.

I keep seeing people who don't know they need a comma after also if it's at the beginning of the sentence.

Also, when someone says “how are you” or “how are you doing” etc, people answer with a “yes”, as in “yes I’m fine” or “yes i’m good thanks”
It’s a relatively new thing, nobody used to say it years ago, the “yes” isn’t relevant to the answer and isn’t grammatically correct.

Annoys me too. That and people who use been and being interchangeably.

turkkadin that's a bit of a niche peeve. Contractions are perfectly standard English in most contexts. Do you object to "don't", "they're", "that's"?

DappledThings, Spoilsport!
I was going to do ect.

FB friend talks of staying in a sweet while on holiday. Must be one hell of a big one.

Posts which start "So..."

' I was sat'. Did someone pick you up and plonk you there or do you mean you were sitting?

longestlurkerever I've been a member of MN for 10 years, and I agree the pattern has changed. I'm just curious as to what constitutes not sitting idly by whilst the house burns to the ground. I'm assuming that involves something more active than creating a general point and laugh post.

YANBU. Unfortunately I saw it written in the grave of someone who died in exceptionally tragic circumstances.

'If love could of...'

I could not believe the stonemason, the family and the cemetery people all accepted or overlooked it on a piece of stone that marks someone's life and tragic end. I haven't said anything to the family obviously as it's highly inappropriate but it did make me feel really sad

*on the gravestone

I’m autistic and as pedantic as any of the PPs here, but there are a couple of things I’d like to point out in defence of some apparent mistakes.
Firstly, “Was you there?” (addressed to a single person) and “I am pedantic, amn’t I”, would have been perfectly good English in the 18th century, and are totally logical.
It used to be “was you” (singular) and “ were you” (plural).
You wouldn’t say “I were there”, even now, yet we (illogically) use the plural form for singles the other way round!
The “Was you” form persists in many dialects, for example Cockney.
The usage “off of”, which I admit sets my teeth on edge, is American English. My DD’s American teacher in her Scottish school actually “corrected” her writing to that form!
English is continually evolving, and endlessly fascinating.
According to Oliver Kamm, who writes the Pedant column in the Times, a lot of the grammar rules that we think we know are nothing of the sort. Split infinitives are fine, for example, as is the interchangeability of less and fewer in most circumstances.
People who complain about grammar Nazis are all very well, but if nobody corrects errors, the poor folk writing them will continue in ignorance, and their poor standard of writing will keep letting them down, perhaps to the point of affecting their employability.
A CV full of mistakes is not a great way to impress a potential employer.