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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To want to report this nursery?

70 replies

Janeych · 14/09/2018 12:43

Witnessed some absolutely shocking behaviour today from staff of a nursery school on a group outing with the children. I’m a mum of 2 little ones and what I saw brought a tear to my eye, just imagining if they were my children being treated like that and I’d never have a clue. No idea of how to go about reporting this or what to do, but feel I must do something, any advice anyone? Thank you x

OP posts:
Original poster
Janeych · 14/09/2018 13:13

They aren’t ‘customer’s though are they, they’re babies.
When toddlers are toilet training they often have false alarms!
And with the last comment, of course, but the use of the word never and nasty tone makes a difference.

OP posts:
RahRahRooRah · 14/09/2018 13:14

@nessie really? 😳

Not a customer - a toddler

Child may have undiagnosed cystitis, or apprehension about going to the loo - not unsurprising if the staff act like this

Parents may say 'you're not coming out again unless... put shoes on/reins on/coat on' etc, but this is perceived in a very different way to a nursery worker/teacher saying it. Parents (usually) show love and affection the rest of the time

mintich · 14/09/2018 13:14

I would be furious if I found put nursery staff were talking about my daughter like that. Report them

RahRahRooRah · 14/09/2018 13:14

@Nesssie

Creeper8 · 14/09/2018 13:16

he’s done this before and didn’t do a wee, let’s not bother’- the child might be known for saying this, and not needing to go, thus wasting time?

^

wtf, my dd always says she needs the toilet then doesnt go, she has asd, she gets the chance to use it every single time. It would never be refused.

Racecardriver · 14/09/2018 13:17

I think the reins are a necessity. Yesterday I saw nursery children on a trip and each worker had two around age two with no safety restraints of any kind, just holding hands. I was a bit Hmm not least of all because we love in Georgian Town where many footpaths are very narrows and traffic heavy. But the attitude is horrible. I wouldn't want my children treated like that. Definitely report.

ProfessorMoody · 14/09/2018 13:17

Please report this. I'm a teacher and no professional adult should ever treat children like that.

Original poster
Janeych · 14/09/2018 13:20

Thank you all, I will definitely be reporting.

OP posts:
Original poster
Janeych · 14/09/2018 13:22

I wish I could go back same time next week, but it was a stop off on the way back from our holiday and about an hour and half away from where we live.

OP posts:
Fleetwoodmac2 · 14/09/2018 13:24

OP, do you live in Suffolk?

PonderLand · 14/09/2018 13:24

I also think you should report it. Maybe they need more help with the children when they're out, maybe they need to be better organised and take the children out in smaller more manageable groups. Either way the manager can put things into action that can stop this happening again.

My son is in nursery and we had problems with them a few weeks ago, I was worried about talking to the manager because I thought she'd brush it off but actually they have been really good and they put things in place straight away. Hopefully the manager at this nursery will be the same.

Original poster
Janeych · 14/09/2018 13:24

No, Midlands

OP posts:
3stonedown · 14/09/2018 13:25

I think you should report it to Ofsted too. Just because the nursery manager might not do anything either. There is one near me that's at the local farm. Anyway a friend found a child wondering around the farm alone in the nursery uniform so she took him to the nursery and the manager just said "ohh there you are, we've been looking for you". The farm isn't secure at all, he would only have to push a little gate to get out.

Original poster
Janeych · 14/09/2018 13:25

I’m so glad @ponderland. Let’s hope so.

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Original poster
Janeych · 14/09/2018 13:27

What county @3stonedown?

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3stonedown · 14/09/2018 13:29

@Janeych Hampshire

Aeroflotgirl · 14/09/2018 13:33

I would report it, the staff sound uncaring and nasty, I would not want my child in that kind of environment.

marmaladecats · 14/09/2018 13:33

Please try and contact the nursery senior management. I'd be absolutely gutted if the staff at my kid's nursery were talking to them that way.

I know our nursery manager would be horrified to find out staff were talking to the children like this.

Almostthere15 · 14/09/2018 13:34

I do think you need to speak to the nursery manager. I'd want to the manager of nursery to be receptive to feedback if staff were being unkind/impatient with my dc. Ultimately they are being paid and I expect them to be engaged and interested. I'd judge it more harshly than a parent having an off day and being tired.

I think wrist straps are fine btw, it's the attitude that isn't.
Depending on how the manager responds I'd consider notifying Ofsted.

twoundertwo54321 · 14/09/2018 13:35

You should certainly report them to the manager as I'm sure the manager will want to know to deal with it accordingly that's not good at all.

raspberrycordial · 14/09/2018 13:37

I reported a childminder to Ofsted and early years, they took it extremely seriously and Ofsted phoned her the next day to say they would be at her house for a visit within an hour. What I witnessed was along the same lines as what you saw, the lady at early years said "we all have a duty to the safeguarding of children" and very definitely told me I had done the same thing. I was distressed by watching this situation and wrote it down when I got home with all the emotive language I wanted to use and it I read it now it still makes me tearful. You are doing the right thing by reporting.

Original poster
Janeych · 14/09/2018 13:41

Thank you so much @raspberrycordial. This is exactly the way I feel. I made sure as soon as we got in the car I made a note of all details, language used and descriptions etc so if I reported it it would be accurate.

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showmeahero · 14/09/2018 13:43

This makes me so sad, imagine if that was your DC that needed the toilet SadDefinitely report to the Nursery Manager or Senior, what do you have to lose?

Ngaio2 · 14/09/2018 14:15

No harm done if there are no concerns found by Ofsted, but nursery manager will be more vigilant. Good practice to remind staff they need to observe safe keeping standards at all times because they never know who is looking.

Neverwrestlewithapig · 14/09/2018 14:38

If it’s the nursery on a farm in the midlands that I know of then it’s part of a local chain so you could report it to their head office.

I would definitely report as although each incident may seem minor to some, it could be part of a bigger picture. Are the staff nurturing enough? Do they have enough support and training? You and I can’t answer that so you need to pass the concerns onto someone else who can.
Btw, if that was my child’s nursery then I would absolutely want you to report it.