Flying at 34 weeks...

[LittleIsland]

Mum wants to take me on a last minute holiday before baby arrives. I'll be 34+1 when we leave and 34+6 when we get back. Doctor happy to sign it off. Mum is also a medical professional.

DP is the only person pushing back. Scared I will go in to labour 5 weeks early and he will miss the birth.

I'm desperate to go. I have insurance. We would be flying somewhere short haul and with good medical provisions.

Would you go and do what YOU want to do and grab your last minute holiday (which is much wanted and needed) or would you do what DP wanted you to do and stay home (to alleviate his fears and help him stay calm towards the birth).

Not saying either is right or wrong, just want opinions... WIBU to go away?

No advice on whether you should go but please check your insurance will also cover the baby if it comes early. I remember one story about a couple who got caught out that way.

I had someone in labour next to me on a flight- almost certain. It was only a 40 minute flight. It was when she grabbed my hand and swigged a gin I was sure.

She might have been terrified of flying?

Re noticing, I was 32 weeks and huge, struggling to get belt to fasten huge and no one asked. Then on way back customs insisted on giving me extra pat down. My mates were like I swear it's just a huge baby!!

I wouldn't.

Perfectly fit, low risk but ended up having to get emergency treatment for suspected DVT after flying for a last holiday. In the end wasn't the case, and I wasnt even 30 weeks but it was quite stressful and made me think a local holiday would have been more relaxing.

What's unfair is that you seem pretty ok about the (admittedly low) risk of having the baby abroad without your partner, when it seems pretty clear he'd be devastated by it. You will probably be fine, but I don't think he's so unreasonable- I know three people who've had babies at 33 weeks, 35 weeks and 36 weeks: all perfectly healthy and fit. The risk is low but the impact of the risk on him and you is very high.

God no, my partner would worry sick, put yourself in your partners shoes. Would you be happy if he went at this stage of pregnancy?

My mum lives in Spain so I went to visit her at 35 weeks and returned a day before 36 weeks. All fine and uncomplicated pregnancy.

I don't know. Some posters won't drive to a wedding a few hours away at this stage of their pregnancy due to " what might happen " which is probably a bit over cautious imo.

I probably wouldn't but then I can overthink things.

I wouldn't. My waters went at 34+6 and ds was born the next day. No warning signs at all, first baby, and he wasn't very well when born and spent a week in SCBU.

DH had to drive back from a meeting 2 hours a way when my waters went, and that was stressful enough for him - imagine your partner being a flight away from you and the baby and his flights wouldn't be covered. Plus you might be covered, but the babys healthcare probably wouldn't be.

Yeah I would go.
I did actually go on holiday at that stage of my first pregnancy (abroad), although DH came with me. All perfectly fine.

She might have been terrified of flying?

Maybe, she was very heavily pregnant.

She was also breathing and timing on her watch! I ordered a gin, she was just sucky breathing at that point. She then said she would have one, as it was too late do any harm now! Then the berthing increased, big breathe and grabbed my hand. Had another gin.

As she got off I said good luck and she said something like its all really happening now.

She had no luggage at all and was met by someone at the airport door and whisked away, I think she wanted her baby born in yorkshire!

I totally get where you're coming from but at the same time I've had this the other way around. I asked my DP not to go away on a holiday/ business trip at a similar point in my first pregnancy for the same reason. I was terrified of going into labour early and him not being there! I had absolutely no medical grounds for this fear, and was actually overdue in the end, but he stayed to stop me worrying and I really appreciated it. I knew I was being a bit precious and silly but it really meant a lot to me that he made that sacrifice to make me feel calmer/ safer.

I'm a bit precious, I wouldn't go. If you did deliver early and baby needed special care you could end.up for months in a foreign country

Depends on how you feel.
I wouldnt have as there's no way id risk hubby missing the birth. Also id have huge issues if he went on a holiday while i was that far gone (but i had a bit of a scary pregnancy plus it was our first).

But. If you would rather go and all paperwork is in check, then defo go.

Can your mum reassure him regarding likelihood/risks etc?

Check that your insurance will cover the baby, if born, as well as yourself.

I wouldn't personally have gone at 34 weeks but that's because I carried big and was suffering with spd and was so uncomfortable sitting still for any length of time. If I didn't have those concerns, I'd have absolutely gone!

OP, check your insurance will cover you as a lot of policies will not cover you beyond 32 weeks; and many exclude pregnancy all together.

I flew at 33 weeks into a high risk pregnancy, alone. I then flew 19 weeks into my second high risk pregnancy, again alone. My husband didn't question it either time as if it had come to it it was exceptionally unlikely (barring precipitate labour) that even if things had kicked off he wouldn't have been able to get to me. (and if I'd had a precipitate labour then it wouldn't have mattered where I was really)

I did go to scout camp with him at 38 weeks (I stayed in the centre in a bed) because I didn't want to be alone but I was still able to help out at camp and knew there was a maternity unit nearby just in case.

I was due to go abroad at 34 weeks but cancelled and went away in UK instead. But that was my choice - not DHs. Just one thing though - are you going somewhere hot. I found extreme heat v v difficult to deal with in my third trimester.

Go if you want to go-but for my two cents, I would be gutted if my husband missed the birth of our child. You never truly know when baby is going to turn up, and as others have said maybe think of it he other way round-if hubby was going to go away for a week at this stage in the game would you be happy? Have a think and then do what you want to do x

It will come down to the airline policy of what is the cut off when flying in pregnancy, sorry if this has been discussed already.

For example, think Ryanair has limit of 32 weeks.

So, even though you are keen and up for going on the trip, it may come down to who will let you fly at this stage,

Did you say the airline will accept up to 36 weeks? And you'd be 36 + 6 days on return? That's over their limit, isn't it?

She said 34+6 on the way back.