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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

I have a blood clot on my lung

79 replies

deepsea · 09/09/2018 21:05

And I have been sent home from hospital and awaiting a CT scan. I am terrified siting here. Is it safe to be at home? Is it unreasonable to want to stay in hospital? I have blood thinners but I feel so bloody unwell.
My dc haven’t stopped arguing. My dh has told me there is no way he can support me as he to work whatever happens (I haven’t even asked him to take any time off) I feel so ill and I feel like no one could care less, not enough to even stop shouting for 5 minutes. I am sobbing and want to leave. I feel too ill to deal with any of this

OP posts:
Needallthehelp · 09/09/2018 21:38

I had a blood clot in my lung at age 30. Uts very scary. I know exactly where you are coming from, its very difficult to breathe and emotionally its a very tough time.

I honestly dont think your dh understands how serious this is. You need time to rest and recover but also at the same time you need to keep active and moving, albeit gently!

Initially you will feel crap and generally miserable. But you will improve. You just need support and by the sounds of it your not getting it.

Ill admit i wasnt sent home initially until id had a VQ scan. However i then asked to go home. Yes it is scary going home, i ended up back in A&E once as i felt it had come back (it hadnt) but panic and anxiety will make you worse. So i am suprised you have gone home, but as you are on anti coagulants you should be fine. Also in hospital you just tend to lay in bed and thats actually the worst thing for a blood clot!

I was on heparin injections for a week and then warfarin tablets and had to have my INR ( blood viscosity) taken regulalry for 6 months and then it was gone.

I think it took me about 2 weeks to feel my breathing was back to normal. But as i say anxiety makes it worse. Try not to shout at the kids! You'll feel worse.

Remember to take nice deep breaths. My breathing became quite shallow as it was painful. But that in itself can cause problems so just make a conscious effort to take deep breaths.

Relax you will feel better soon.

LEMtheoriginal · 09/09/2018 21:39

The kids don't understand the seriousness of it. So please don't feel hurt by their behaviour - they are expressing their anxiety indirectly.

Your DH either has his head in the sand or he's a total cunt. Sorry.

I think you should try and speak to a dr. The trouble is 111 will send you in because of the breathing. Can you call the ward you were on for advice?

daughterofanarchy · 09/09/2018 21:42

Here for a hand hold OP. I can’t begin to imagine how terrified you must feel, please try and rest. As for your husband he needs to be a lot more considerate. Sending you love.

Cherry321 · 09/09/2018 21:43

Sorry to hear y our situation. You say you have good friends, can you call or text one of them? Flowers

Bugjune · 09/09/2018 21:46

Whereabouts are you, OP?

deepsea · 09/09/2018 21:47

Yes he works for a ruthless company and lives in fear of losing his job. Any kind emergency and he panics because we have so little support and if he lost his job we are so screwed.
My grandmother died of this so maybe I am over worrying.
It is good to know otters have this and have all been fine

OP posts:
deepsea · 09/09/2018 21:48

South west

OP posts:
Sugarpiehoneyeye · 09/09/2018 21:49

It must be very scary for you OP, sending you love and healing vibes.
Try not to let anxiety take over, tomorrow will be here soon enough.
Please speak to your good friends, they'll want to be there for you.
Your husband, is either running scared himself, or not a very nice man.
You are not alone Sweet, someone will be around throughout the night, should you want to talk.
Let us know how you get on.🌺

AdoraBell · 09/09/2018 21:51

I’m not saying your isn’t BU, but it seems that many employers these days don’t give a flying fuck and would sack someone for taking time off. If that’s what his work is like then I can see why he can’t help.

Can you ask friends to help? I hope scan goes well in the morning and you get some rest tonight.

AnnieAnoniMoose · 09/09/2018 21:54

I’m sorry you’re going through this 🌷

Send the kids to bed if you haven’t yet.

ASK your ‘d’h WTAF he’s on about. They are his children and he needs to step up & look after the kids, the house AND YOU. Tell him there is NO choice. I can’t believe he said he can’t support you. He’s supposedly your HUSBAND.

If you feel safer in hospital, when you go in tomorrow, stay. They’ll let you if you kick up a fuss.

CripsSandwiches · 09/09/2018 21:56

Oh OP you poor thing. I bet tomorrow seems like an eternity away. I'm sure your DD's love you and care that you're unwell - I find children behave worse when they're stressed which could explain the arguing. I imagine if they were really worried they wouldn't have sent you home but don't hesitate to go back if your breathing gets worse Flowers.

ItsClemFandangoCanYouHearMe · 09/09/2018 21:56

Oh OP I know it's awful, I've had a PE while pregnant and I felt dreadful. Now you're on thinners you will start to feel better, just take it easy so you're not over-exerting yourself.

Try to sleep propped up, I found if I laid flat I would start gasping in my sleep but propped up I slept a lot better.

I'm sorry things are so shit at home Thanks

CripsSandwiches · 09/09/2018 21:58

Also call in every favour you can. Even if it was someone I didn't know very well I'd be more than happy to take your DD's to and from school if you were too unwell to do so. The house can be messy, the kids can eat frozen pizza (which your DH can put in the oven). Just sit and rest.

deepsea · 09/09/2018 21:59

My friends are really going through it. That is why I am reluctant to text them. One is in the middle of divorce, two others have father and dh in hospital with t.cancer, one of my oldest friend’s dd is seriously self harming. We are all up to our eyes in problems at the moment. I don’t know if it is our age.
I will call one of them tomorrow and ask if they can come with me maybe. Dh seems to have realised belatedly and is now fussing. I asked him to go and look at what it is, he was too busy with the dc earlier to even do that.

OP posts:
Mellifera · 09/09/2018 22:01

Sending a hug OP.

I had a PE almost 10 years ago. Was kept in hospital until the scan but they really didn‘t do anything, except take my blood pressure twice a day.
I was scared stiff but they told me once I was on blood thinners, it was safe.
My scan showed an awful lot of clots which were stuck to the lining of the lung, (big clot burst) and my breathing hurt for quite some time.

All the best and get help, you need lots of rest and time for your body to get over the physical stuff and to get over the shock of it.

30303030old · 09/09/2018 22:03

Try not to panic, I had two a few years ago because of chrmo. They started me on blood thinners straight away but I waited a week for the scan to confirm. I couldn’t go home because of the whole cancer thing, but I was discharged eventually before it was gone.

Is the surgery unrelated? I was given an IVC filter to catch any further clots during subsequent surgery.

I know it’s scary and feels totally ouwith your control but you’ve started on blood thinners so it will disperse by itself. I’ve known other people to have them and it
Was scary but the clots did break down with treatment.

deepsea · 09/09/2018 22:04

I hate the way we are held to ransom by his company. They have sacked people for a lot less.
I feel much calmer now the dc are in bed and the house is quiet. The dogs even look worried! Strange how they can tell.
Thank you for your kindness and comforting words. I can’t tell you what they mean to me. There are some really good eggs in the world, thank you everyone 🕯

OP posts:
HerestoyouMrsRobinson · 09/09/2018 22:07

This is a little thing but it helps me.
Breathe in counting to 7 and out counting to 11.

When it feels easier try to also imagine you are in a favourite place?

deepsea · 09/09/2018 22:07

No the surgery is a total hip replacement. Will I be able to have my operation do you think? I know dvt can be a concern.

OP posts:
LostboysNo1fan · 09/09/2018 22:09

Try to keep calm OP
(I know thats easier than it sounds!)

They thought I had a blood clot on my lung last year but it turned out to be pneumonia and partial lung collapse.
I was given a blood thinning injection then sent home to come back the next day for a CT scan.
It must be relatively safe to do that (I had a pregnancy of unknown location once as they wouldn't let me leave until the treatment plan had been decided)

So whilst it sounds scary (and I was the same as you, terrified!) it must be clinically safe enough to send you home. I hope that helps to reassure you a bit.

Sorry you're not getting any help though. You need to rest so leave anything that's not urgent/necessary and lie down.

Hope you're better soon.

30303030old · 09/09/2018 22:12

Ask about ivc filters - they are like little umbrellas which are placed in the vena cava through your groin or neck. Not pleasant to have fitted but made it safer for me (liver resection which couldn’t be delayed). I don’t know what the script is with non emergency surgery, but you should have that conversation sooner rather than later. Everyone gets heparin injections post surgery and you have to stop taking the thinners for a certain number of days pre surgery, I was on dalteparin not warfarin so don’t know how it works. (Because I was on chemo warfarin wasn’t appropriate.).

Please chat through all of this with your consultant, it will come up during your pre op but I’d phone your surgeons secretary and explain the situation ASAP,

endofthelinefinally · 09/09/2018 22:13

I think it is very unlikely you will be able to have your surgery until you have finished the treatment for this clot.
I know it is a shock, but it sounds as if this is a familial problem and it is possible that having this clot now has saved you from having a massive post op clot. You will need to see a specialist for further tests at the end of your treatment. Do you know if anyone else in your family has had a clot? Your doctor needs to know that information.
What medication are you on?

Sportsnight · 09/09/2018 22:14

Only your consultant can decide on whether the operation can go ahead. It is harder with you on blood thinners - you’d likely have to come off them for the actual operation.

I had a pulmonary embolism post c-section, 6 months on blood thinners, and no recurrence or underlying problems. The anxiety was the worst ongoing symptom for me. It lasted for 6 months for me, and I really felt very bleak at times. There are a couple of very friendly support groups for PE sufferers on Facebook, where you’ll be able to get support any time day or night.

Like you I was discharged from hospital within about 6-hours (which was quite a turnaround having been blue-lighted in!).

redsummershoes · 09/09/2018 22:15

poor you.
that's a lot to take in.
luckily your dc are old enough to take some weight off you. can they get themselves to school?
they could do some light housework like put a load of washing on. washing up, making dinner (warming up ready meals).

dh will need to do more so you can recover properly, but he should be able to do that around his job.

thaegumathteth · 09/09/2018 22:17

Just to say OP I recently had sepsis and when I came home from hospital I felt terrified and convinced I was getting worse - I think it’s natural and for me, it shook my confidence a lot.

Please look after yourself. I have pushed myself too hard over the last few weeks and am still not 100%.