Worried about my 14 month old baby’s development

[MaryLouFreebush]

Hi, I’m new to Mumsnet & this is my first post so I’m sorry if I’m putting this in the wrong place. Any help/advice/reassurance would be much appreciated!
I’m a first time mum to a 14 month old boy. He’s amazing, my absolute world, but I’m getting a bit concerned about his development & just curious to know what others think.
He isn’t walking yet & in my opinion he’s not going to master it any time soon. He doesn’t pull himself up on anything, the only time he’ll get up onto his feet is if I offer him my hands & then he’ll do it straight away. He tries to pull himself up in his cot but he can’t do it, although he will stand up happily in his cot or against the couch if I put him there, & he’s just started to cruise a bit now.
He can roll from front to back & back to front no problems. He can sit unaided very well, but he can’t get from sitting to lying down on his front or back, unless this is by accident i.e. falling. Similarly if he’s lying down he can’t get into a sitting position, like he wouldn’t roll onto his front & manoeuvre his legs to sitting up. He doesn’t crawl, he doesn’t really use his knees at all & if I try & put him on all fours he just laughs & sinks down onto the floor! He can get around by bum shuffling or he bounces around on his back. Or he can kind of push himself backwards if he’s on his tummy. But to be honest, he just doesn’t seem to have much interest in getting around! I’ve tried sitting him in the middle of the floor & putting toys out of reach, & he’ll try & reach them but he tends to get really frustrated & cry.
If I stand him up & take his hands & walk around the room with him he will walk but he’s very unsteady. He can’t stand unaided, he can hold on with just 1 hand but he’s a bit wobbly.
Also, various websites have said that in terms of milestones for his age he should be able to say a few words now, but he can’t. He’s very vocal & he babbles loads, but he doesn’t say any words. He does dadadadada & nanananana, we’ve had the occasional mamamamama - but he doesn’t say them in context.
I don’t know if I’m worrying unnecessarily & need to chill out & concentrate on just enjoying him, or if I’ve been too laid back & not tried to encourage him enough to do more.

Op he sounds like is making progress and that's the important thing.

FWIW I would still recommend asking for a referral to physiotherapy. Although they say don't worry unless they are 18months and not walking he is still not moving between sitting and lying down and still not crawling. That could indicate he has weakness somewhere causing this. They could give you some exercises to work in which could make a big difference for years to come. You described him really well.

Crawling is a big developmental stage and although some children will miss out on it and be fine, it strengthens their shoulders and arms and tummy which in turn will help them for later skills like holding a pen and writing in school.

It isn't going to do any harm asking for the referral. There might be a wait or you may have to convince a health visitor why (you've convinced me as a physio!). If by the time the appointment comes round you really feel he is fine, just cancel it. No harm done. Not trying to scare you, but the earlier and issues picked up and dealt with the better all round. Good luck with him x

These are the two sitting up exercises that I do with my son. I find the second one the better of the two. The first one he still hasn't figured out after a few weeks or trying (1st section in photo 1), but the second one (rest of photo 1 and photo 2) he figured out in a couple of days (this week actually). It's great to say to him "do you want to sit up" and he does it straight away. Though it's not so great when he won't go to sleep and he likes to practise. 😂

I think Fluffymullet is right. Get the referral to the physiotherapist. It will give you better piece of mind. It helped me a lot as I was so worried before hand. I even posted on here asking people for advice on what to expect from a physiotherapist appointment. But I know he doesn't have any problems, he just needs to be taught.

Thanks very much Figmentofimagination, really appreciate you posting those exercises & will definitely give them a go.
Fluffymullet, thanks also for your advice about a physiotherapy referral (I think a PP had advised the same too) - I agree it wouldn't do any harm to ask & could be cancelled if it turned out he didn't need it. When I spoke to HV she insisted that crawling wasn't a milestone that they looked for, but he will need to learn how to crawl eventually at some point, surely?

I also don't think you should worry but at the same time I am going to go against the grain - bum shuffling is a sign that the child's infant reflexes have not gone dormant. Children are born with a number of infant reflexes - for example, a child moving down the birth canal - his or her shoulders hitting the vagina either side triggers their crawling reflex. When they start crawling this allows their body to develop left and right brain abilities - it also helps with their sight and tracking that then helps with their concentration and reading.
My son was born prematurely via a C section and didn't crawl properly before he walked. But when he started walking he also started running - it was like he couldn't stand still. He either had to be moving or be a sleep. He really struggled to sit in a school chair and concentrate.
Despite all this - my son did well - he passed his grammar school exams, and passed the trial to train with a significant football team. BUT he just had all these niggly problems. People describe it like building a house on foundations that have not been finished yet - you can still build the house but it has weak spots.
It was suggested when my son was 10 that his infant reflexes had not gone dormant...and when I had him assessed at the age of 11 - I could actually see with my own eyes that these reflexes had definitely not gone dormant. The really obvious one is his rooting reflex - he moves his tongue around in his mouth when he concentrates, but there is another one where when he walks on the outside of his feet - his hands mimic the shape he creates with his feet and his fingers curl in. When he walks on the inside of his feet, his hands mimic this and his fingers curl out. If you hold a pencil to his nose and tell him to look at it with both eyes - one eye looks at the pencil and the other eye thinks its looking at the pencil but its actually looking in the other direction. Technically, he has nothing wrong with his eye sight - but what I described is a sign he has something wrong with his tracking which must affect his reading.
So I started this brushing technique (I think it triggers nerve development) and it as been like a miracle - there are conversations about it on the SEN threads. And each time I go back to the therapist - again I can see with my own eyes that his reflexes are starting to go dormant.
But most significantly within days of starting the brush technique I could see the positive effect it was having on him. My son is now the calmest, happiest and confident he has ever been.
I have no doubt your son is OK - but the question is there a chance he could he be more OK. Trust your instincts and do some research. You may find in 6 months there was nothing to worry about - but it is obviously bothering you so it would not hurt to look further.
Also worth mentioning, I have also known lots of kids who have not walked at his age - they have sometimes had hypermobility. These children have always ended up OK with physio - but its worth being in the system as early as possible if you can. My children have hyper mobility, and although it never affected them walking, the specialist said it is inherited so one of the parents must also have it. So if you or your son's dad have hyper mobility (IBS can also be a symptom as hypermobility is about muscles being weak and this can mean the digestive muscles) - then its worth considering this also.

I wouldn't worry about the speech - a lot of kids, especially boys, are slower starters. Mine had no words at 18 months but over 100 at 24 months!

The walking sounds more worrying - not that he isn't walking so much as that he isn't very close. It may well be nothing but I would talk to your GP pr health visitor

Lots of reassuring comments on here but, as a mother of two children with additional needs, there's alot to be said for a Mother's instinct.

If you feel like something is off, go and talk to the Health Visitor. Also, keep an eye. If the HV says there's nothing to worry about but things haven't progressed in say, 3 months, take your little one to a GP for reassurance.
My dd didn't walk until 18m, crawled at 13m but was talking lots by 18m (way more than average). Hypermobile (age 5) and autism (age 7).
My ds walked at approx 18m, crawled at 10m and spoke quite early. Lots of tantrums past the normal age for tantrums, runs in an odd way, wets himself regularly, speaks in an unusual way (but excellent vocabulary) etc etc Hypermobile (age 4), Dyspraxia (age 7) and awaiting an autism assessment at age 8.

I always knew something was "up" with both of them.

Plus, I've had lots of professionals dismiss my concerns but a parent knows their child best

i dont have experience of late walking but I do have an almost 14month old who isn't really talking yet. She has two older siblings who both learnt to talk early so that makes it even more weird to me. She seems just as clever as them in terms of what she understands and how she responds to others speaking to her so i am convinced it isnt a reflection of that Time will tell.

I think with your first you worry more. My cousin didn't walk until 18m and he was on a referral waiting list. He is both very intelligent and perfectly agile now so no correlation there!

Try not to worry too much about this. All babies are different. I'm almost glad Mumsnet wasn't around when mine were babies - I'd have been paranoid reading about all the milestones they are supposed to reach and when. All 3 of mine walked at 10 months but 2 of them could barely string a sentence together before starting school. They soon caught up. Speak to your health visitor.