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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

Staff at supermarket

34 replies

London91 · 05/09/2018 17:07

Stopped by a supermarket after work to grab some dinner bits and some pregnancy tests. Paid and went to leave as expected the security alarm went off. The woman who served me told me to go and the proceeded to shout "it's the pregnancy tests that's all" the security guard came over I produced my receipt and he searched my bags. And kept checking items that were not the cause of the alarm going off. I'd already explained what has caused it to go off. He was happy I had paid for everything and as I left the woman at the till again shouted "I told you it was just the pregnancy tests. Am I being unreasonable to be pissed off that she did that. I have no problem with the security guard doing his job just felt like the assistant could have been more sensitive and discreet rather than embarrass me like that. I could be just being oversensitive but I'm fuming and have half a mind to complain for her conduct.

OP posts:

CanuckBC · 05/09/2018 17:09

That would have pissed me off. You didn’t need everyone and their dog to know what you were buying! Discretion should have been used.

Cabochard · 05/09/2018 17:09

Who will you complain to?
I doubt anyone would have been taking any notice!

Cabochard · 05/09/2018 17:10

Were you in Tesco?

Original poster

London91 · 05/09/2018 17:13

This was in sainsburys. I would complain to head office. I just think discretion could have been used.

OP posts:

DastardlyAndMuttley · 05/09/2018 17:14

Tbh that would piss me off too.

OutPinked · 05/09/2018 17:14

YANBU. I wouldn’t be ashamed buying that but obviously many people would, especially if it were potentially an unplanned pregnancy. Would this staff member have done the same for condoms or lube? She should have had more foresight.

LoniceraJaponica · 05/09/2018 17:14

That's not on. It could have been my daughter. If she had been in the local Tesco there would have been at least one person who might have known her.

nhssecretary · 05/09/2018 17:15

I have been asked "are you trying then?" When buying pregnancy tests!!

minisoksmakehardwork · 05/09/2018 17:16

I used to go to a different branch when I was buying pregnancy tests. I didn't need to bump into someone who might see and speculate.

Yanbu. I would complain in writing at least to the store manager.

Flyme21 · 05/09/2018 17:16

Yes, complain. That was a sensitive piece of information that she might have been sharing with people who know you.

Original poster

London91 · 05/09/2018 17:18

It wasn't my local branch luckily but easily someone from work could have been in there and I would prefer people at work not know I'm trying.

OP posts:

DSHathawayGivesMeFannyGallops · 05/09/2018 17:19

I can see why you'd be embarrassed, I probably would say something. What if it had been something more embarassing? Just because I haven't seen Mum-from-School as I went round, doesn't she hasn't clocked me....and seen me set off the beepers ... and now knows I wear heavy duty tena lady because of the check out girl yelling. I used to work in retail & we always told to be very discreet so as not to embarass people in such circs.

Also which I had complained about the nasty bitch who used to work in the Boots near my uni. Buying a 12 pack of Durex she informed me - and the rest of the store- VERY loudly that they were on offer. Also once bought a pregnancy test and heard her audibly tutt. I was 18 and felt ashamed. I'd kick her arse now!!!

GreatDuckCookery6211 · 05/09/2018 17:19

Yes it was insensitive.

PinkCalluna · 05/09/2018 17:19

I agree it was indiscreet I think I’d have politely pointed that out to her at the time though.

Nhs first time I ever bought a pregnancy test the assistant asked me if I was hoping for positive or hoping for negative.

I smiled sweetly and said I was hoping for privacy. She had the grace to blush.

Impulsesealer · 05/09/2018 17:21

Yanbu, I’d have been horrified! No one else’s business what is going on in there, she should have been way more discreet.

Original poster

London91 · 05/09/2018 17:21

Maybe I should have said something just wanted to get the hell out of there. I was way past where she was.

OP posts:

troodiedoo · 05/09/2018 17:28

I would complain to the store manager. that's very thoughtless. you don't need to say which exact person it was. although it might say on your receipt if you did want to.

the alarm thing in general pisses me right off. for someone with anxiety it could be really upsetting. I just carry on walking if I ever set it off. they've never come after me.

ManicStreetTeacher · 05/09/2018 17:31

Complain to the store and to head office. Years ago I was waiting on my contraceptive pill prescription in Boots. The witch of a pharmacist told me in a loud, patronising voice, "You've ticked the wrong box on this. The contraceptive pill is free for everyone." I was young and embarrassed (which she could clearly see) and I so wish I had spoken up for myself.

PipeTheFuckDown · 05/09/2018 17:32

One of the staff in my local Superdrug told my Step sisters grandma that she’d been buying pregnancy tests (she was 19 at the time, much younger than me). She was buying them for me as I was miscarrying and the GP advised to test after, and I couldn’t face going to buy them. Fortunately her Gran knew all of this (she sent me a lovely thoughtful card) but it could have caused some serious trouble if my step sister had been pregnant and was wanting to get an abortion without telling anyone...

I complained to the manager about staff gossiping and was laughed at

Bahhhhhumbug · 05/09/2018 17:32

Reminds me of my late dad who once was in his bank branch full of locals and the cashier was mouthing her words at him (which included that he'd gone overdrawn one day and that was reason he was charged) in a very loud exaggerated way that some people do to older people.
My dad said to her 'Can you speak up a bit love, those right at the back can't quite hear all my business'

BloodyDisgrace · 05/09/2018 17:41

Yeah, they could have been discreet. I personally wouldn't be horrified or embarrassed though. I had the opposite: I was wondering why a [male] pharmacist lowered his tone when saying the word "contraception" to me, as if he was talking about something shameful or illegal. It's not cocaine he's selling me, right? As if he's implying I'm a kind of daisy who faints at the mentioning of "such matters".
But then, this is all trivial at the end of the day.

whywhywhywhywhyyy · 05/09/2018 17:42

Certain stores have them in very big security boxes to make the tag unmissable. Never got why until this!

CheeseAndOnionIceCream · 05/09/2018 17:44

Highly insensitive IMO. I think I would have gone back and said to the woman 'Was it really necessary for you to announce to the whole shop what I was buying?'. Maybe,just maybe,it might make her think twice next time.

TooMuchPenis · 05/09/2018 17:48

I complained to the manager about staff gossiping and was laughed at

@pipethefuckdown! No way, I'd have taken it further because of that. Assholes.

TooMuchPenis · 05/09/2018 17:49

Bloodydisgrace contraception won't risk your position at work if a colleague overhears though! A pregnancy test is a much bigger deal.

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