To want to run away

[gnarlington]

My son goes back to school tomorrow. Im severely emetophobic (vomit phobia) and spent the whole of last year (his reception year) in a state of panic and anxiety waiting for him to pick up a sickness bug. I've been trying since he was born to get over this phobia, various counselling types, medicines, self help, and it's just getting worse. He didn't actually get a bug in his reception year but did catch one in the first week of the summer holidays from a wedding.
I'm yet again feeling so anxious and scared and I just want to run away. I love him to bits but regret having a child because of this phobia. I don't know what to do.
How often do your kids get stomach bugs? Anyone got any advice about therapies I can try for phobias? I have tried CBT, hypnosis, counselling, acupuncture, meditation and I'm currently doing a self help program. I'm really struggling and feel so sad

Maybe having the ultimatum/necessity of having to sort it out because its your child will help you conquer it.

DS and DD have both had bugs precisely once. They’re now 5 and 8. Your phobia sounds really tough to deal with

I don't know much about it but couldn't something like beta blockers help? I find it almost impossible to panicking them as they suppress adrenaline and thus inhibit the fight or flight element.

First of all stop reading any social media or dr google about norovirus. I know my anxiety is much worse when people post updates on Facebook about their kid getting ill and then I think when is it my turn. As it happens when dd had it, it wasn’t that bad.

So step away from the Internet.

Second of all, just know when it happens it will be worse for your child than you. Maintain decent hygiene, have gloves and bleach in stock and know how to deal with it.

I have beta blockers, not tried them yet. I am coming off Facebook for a while because I just don't want to know. It's hearing it in the playground as well though.

My daughter is 15 and she’s probably had sickness bugs 10 times in her life.
Your fear sounds awful. How hard for you 🙁 Do you have support? If someone could help you with looking after him on the rare occasion he might get one. I hope you get the help you need.

My husband is great but I still really struggle to handle it

I was also going to suggest beta blockers. More of a band aid than a cure but might offer some relief. Anxiety is bloody shit.

I'm so sorry, OP I have a fear of sick too, but not as debilitating as yours. My son is just about to go into Year 2 and he hasn't had any sickness bugs at all, and has survived several rounds of norovirus and D&V bugs in nursery and school. He's only ever had 4 days off school and that was for chicken pox, when he was still fine in himself but just spotty! Hopefully your DS is healthy too. I did still feel panicky and immediately feel sick as soon as I hear of any bugs going around!

I feel your pain op! The worst is when people say 'oh there's a lot of it about' - I don't want to know! If it's any consolation I was paralysed with anxiety when the dc were babies/toddlers - I never took first born to any toddler groups etc because of this, but as they've got older it's definitely got better. It doesn't take over my life now. Sometimes I might go a whole day without thinking about it! So, this too shall pass.