Family issues making my children suffer

[JW1226]

I'm so upset, today is my daughters birthday , may I add I have 2children and one on the way....

I recently split from my children's father my eldest (birthday girl) isn't bio her father but has been the only daddy she's had and they have a strong bond.

I moved into my Nans house , my uncle who's 50 lives here too, along with my 18yo sister.

Back to today.....
Me and daddy took the kids to the beach for a birthday treat she had a fantastic day!
My Nan and uncle have said their dad can't come in the house....
Anyway we had a long drive home and all needed a wee as you do! I said I'm sure it will be okay just quickly go it's dd bday so I'm sure u going loo won't matter....
He goes to use loo and my uncle my alcoholic uncle had shouted some abuse at him things got heated and now the days ruined.

I'm about to give birth, my family thought the kids dad wouldn't stick around well now he's still being a good dad keeping in mind my eldest isn't bio his they do not like it!
I'm at a loss , the dad is hurt and upset and angry too for ruining the day our girls day!

These people around me are no good I need to move ASAP just a matter of finding a property I'm going through so much stress but the biggest thing is them making the kids suffer out of all of this. Seems they don't want him anywhere near us well that's impossible even tho we arnt in a relationship we can have good times for the children they don't need to suffer in this I don't even know what I'm asking I just need to get this off my chest as I can't trust anyone nor talk to anyone. Dad won't ever come back here now after this so we all suffer because of my controlling idiotic family.

Bless you. Try not to let them get to you. Moving ASAP is exactly the right thing. I found myself in a similar situation with parents hating the “stepdad” . His presence & obvious care for you & your daughter may be perceived as a threat by your uncle & nan. If they are used to telling you what to do & enjoy exercising control, they’ll likely try to push him out of the picture. I’d meet up with him elsewhere & not tell them. I don’t see my family anymore because of behaviour like this . The stepdad I referred to is now my DH married 18 years. Oh & it’s been lovely & peaceful without them.

Forgot...Happy Birthday to your daughter &

I get it, but it isn’t your house and them not wanting him to come into the house was something you agreed to. Is there a reason why your Ex needs access to where you are living to have contact?

Of course your uncle behaved appalling but you appear to not understand that it isn’t your home and agreeing to and then breaking a house rule (even if you think the rule is a petty only one) isn’t on.

Your children won’t suffer if you just arrange contact away from your grandmother’s house.