Ok so it is complicated.
Next door but one lives a girl who is in dd1's class. She is the daughter of the lady who was recently sectioned for the 2nd time. She is 9.
When the mum went into hospital last time, the girls dad was working, and so i offered to take the girl to and from school so that he could continue to work, but they chose to practically ignore my offer and got family members to drive quite far each morning to do the job instead.
Now this time, the mum is in hospital but the dad is no longer working so is available to do the school run. I did still offer to help in any way ie school run if it clashed with visiting times etc, but it doesn't clash and so it wasn't a problem.
Last week this dad gets given a car and starts using it for school run. However his dd does not want to go in the car and so now every morning she knocks our door and asks if she can walk with us. When i collect my kids in the afternoon her dad goes to collect her in the car, she tells him she isn't going in the car and asks again if she can walk with us, i say yes cos i can't really say anything else, and so he gets her bags and goes off in the car.
The main reason I am getting annoyed with this is because the girl isn't very well behaved at all. I know she has been through alot recently, but I have known her since she was 4 and she has always been the same, she is spoilt and her mum and dad are too scared to stand up to her and say NO.
She regularly picks on my dd2 and has been in trouble for telling my ds to say innapropriate things to me and other people. She also talks to her dad in the most disrespectful way I have ever heard from a child.
As i said, if her dad was working and not there for the school run then I really wouldn't mind, but he is there to do it, and just doesn't want to say No we are going in the car, or walk with her himself. If his wife knew he was doing this she would be so upset as she always says he doesn't do enough with the dd and that he is unreliable.
Yesterday at pick up time he said 'can * walk with you then cos she doesn't want to go in the car'. I had already promised my kids an icelolly from the shop as they had been good, and i couldn't afford to buy her one aswell, and so said 'sorry i am going to the shop', and he said 'thats ok she can go too', so in the end i said 'no sorry i am not going straight home after'. Eventually he said right ok but she started to have a paddy about it, and so he asked someone else who lives on our street if she could walk with them.
This morning, we were running late and she knocks the door asking if she can walk with us. I couldn't find the front door keys and so dd told her through the letter box that we were not ready and to carry on with her dad.
She said no he is going in the car i will wait. I went to the door and said we were not ready and didn't know how long we'd be so she'd have to carry on and eveentually she went and i saw her walk down the road with her dad.
10 min later we have found the keys and off we go. We get round the corner and there is her and her dad. She said 'oh i told him we had to wait or i wasn't going'. He then says, 'oh i'll leave her with you then' and walks off back home.
I just cannot see why he cannot stand up to her and tell her that this is how it is, she is going in the car and thats that. Either that or walk with her himself.
I know i probably am being a bit unreasonable, but I have trouble enough keeping track of my own 3 to and from school some days, nevermind an unruly extra.