do people get more bitter/ jealous or am I just getting more sensitive

[Greekyoghurt83]

I am approaching 40 and just noticed in the last year a lot of my "friends" aren't actually that nice to me! I wonder as they approach mid life that they have their own shit to deal with and therefore are stressed, anxious etc. To give context, a few have been dismissive about something important to me or catty / or making me the butt of their jokes, i just can't be arsed with BS anymore. I would say these people aren't my besties and probably friends because of wider social groups and life circumstances. I thought I enjoyed their company but actually can't be arsed with people that make me feel rubbish or anxious. Is it just me or did other people reduce their friendshi groups in their late thirties/ early 40s? For context I have probably grown closer to those who I have deeper friendships with. Just interested to hear your experiences of this ...or is it me being overly sensitive and there's always tricky people in friendship groups?

Hmm. I wouldn’t say so. I actually have found that people are generally a bit more generous of spirit and relaxed about people’s different life choices. Most people of 40 who I know (which is a few as I am 40 this year) have been through some fairly major stuff so it gives a bit of balance and perspective onto things.

I think the issue here may be that these people you know are arseholes rather than 40. It sounds like you have reached the point my friends and I have reached while others in your group have remained in mean girls mode

so succinctly put passmethecrisps and I think you are right!

I think late 30s and 40 is an age of change for many.

Perhaps that is what is happening for you.

I had a friend cull in my late 20s, early 30s as we had kids. I don't have the time for people who aren't very nice. I have close friends who I mainly communicate with via phone and acquaintances locally. I don't have time for anything else