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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To have fallen in love with Staffies?

231 replies

WellAlwaysHaveParis · 01/09/2018 16:44

I went to a dog show earlier today, and loads of people had come with their dogs to spend the day there.

I met some people with Staffies, and the dogs were absolutely beautiful. One of them was so calm and quiet, and she would just let people pet her and stroke her, and the other one was a bit overexcited and would jump up and lick everyone who stroked him 😍

I’ve never had a dog before, as we’ve always had cats, but I’d love to have a dog one day.

I’d definitely get a rescue dog, as we’ve always had cats from rescue centres, but the idea of having a big rescue dog like a Staffie worries me a bit, as I’m not sure how I’d train it. I know Staffies have a bit of a bad reputation, but I’ve heard lovely things about them and would really love one one day. I just wouldn’t know where to start with training one and looking after one as I’ve never had dogs before.

Would I be unreasonable to think about getting one at some point? Does anyone on here have one?

(Part of this thread is a ploy to ask for your Staffie photos Grin😍)

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powershowerforanhour · 03/09/2018 22:56

But in answer to your question- YANBU! Almost all of them are sweethearts with people and many- most even- are OK with other dogs. It's the possibility of misdirected aggression and the propensity to grip that would bother me slightly.

hungryhippo90 · 03/09/2018 23:00

We met the cutest little staff yesterday.
He had such a calmness about him. I was giving him all the good boys and strokes which he was enjoying, he gave a few gentle kisses on my hands, I wanted go take him home!

They are a lovely breed.

It's some owners which make them less so.

TheSmallClangerWhistlesAgain · 03/09/2018 23:11

I've found Standard Poodles to be not that good with other dogs. They're lovely dogs, just not sociable with others. powershowerforanhour, have you also found this?

A lot of dogs are more aggressive to others when on their leads as well

crazydoglady6867 · 03/09/2018 23:12

powershower. You seem very clued up and in my very limited experience of the staffie you are absolutely right. My girl is rescue and she is a dream with people but will lunge at some dogs, never a pup or a weaker dog so I hope with your theory she is pretty normal. She will never bite if she does react to a dog so I think she is ok, am I right in my thinking?

powershowerforanhour · 04/09/2018 00:03

TheSmallClanger, we only have a small number of standard poodles on the practice books and they have all seemed to be even tempered with both people and dogs, but my sample size is too small for me to draw any very firm conclusions about them.

crazy...don't know; it would be interesting to have a behaviourist with a lot of Staff experience to watch her. Generally I think showing body language is a good thing though. If she has shown a reaction at times, but not tried to grab, grip or pin a dog when she was in that reactive state then that is much less of a worry than if you'd said "she usually totally ignores other dogs but then pinned one out of the blue with no warning first"
But I am not a behaviourist just a GP style vet and it is much easier to watch a dog in the flesh than talk about things or even watch a video.

MorningsEleven · 04/09/2018 00:52

I love staffies
I have a greyhound who was kennelled with staffies and now he thinks he's one. I've never met an aggressive staffies, usually they just give me the "why is that daft bugger rolling on the floor beside me?" face

Creeper8 · 04/09/2018 01:18

Ive always thought they were the ugliest dogs.

Aus84 · 04/09/2018 06:14

YANBU to have fallen in love with them. They can be beautiful creatures. My brother had a female from a puppy. She was a beloved family pet with the sweetest nature. They had to get rid of her when she tried to bite my nephews face off out of the blue one day, but up until that point she wouldn't hurt a fly.

MeyMary · 04/09/2018 09:25

Some dogs attack cats. Dogs have a prey drive and if they're not brought up with cats as friends, they will attack them. Most dogs are like this.
My friends beloved cat was also killed by a staff. I am still upset by this years later. But I am not daft enough to blame the dog, who should have been under control. I blame the cnt owners, and I blame the fact cats are seen as property rather than pets, and criminal damage isn't such a serious offence that people are wary of commiting it.*

100% agree. I love dogs but some dog owners are incredibly irresponsible. I sometimes wonder how many dogs attacks are actually due to dogs being in pain or having treatable health issues... (Based on my experience with dogs in rural/southern Italy.)

I really do believe that dog licences should be mandatory.

RandomObject · 04/09/2018 09:44

I was mauled as a child - that dog was a great dane, and it jumped and attacked the moment it saw me.

I was attacked by a dog a few years back requiring stitches on my leg - Jack Russell.

Love smiley staffies, so chunky and waddly. I notice when in the park that they tend to be the most well behaved dogs that stay close to their owners.

spidey66 · 04/09/2018 09:56

I used to be wary of them because I had them mixed up with pitbulls. But then a guy with one was selling the Big Issue near my work, and I was sold. Lovely, lovely friendly, smiley dog.

DogInATent · 04/09/2018 10:02

I blame the fact cats are seen as property rather than pets

If they were treated like pets there would be an expectation that the owner was responsible for their actions. I'm legally responsible for keeping my Staffy under control, cleaning up behind it i public, for preventing it's escape, and for ensuring that it's identifiable and traceable (chipped, collar with tag) whenever it's out.

It's a convenience for most cat owners (been there - had 3.5 rescue cats before our current rescue dog) that they're property not pet, that way they don't have responsibility for keeping them out of the neighbours gardens, etc.

SerenDippitty · 04/09/2018 10:15

A lot of dogs are more aggressive to others when on their leads as well

They feel more vulnerable to attack when on the lead, they can’t get away.

Auldspinster · 04/09/2018 10:21

My brother has a 10 year old staffie called Syd and is completely uninterested in my small nephews. He has a chocolate lab brother called Alfie and they're like two peas in a pod and love each other. He's soft as shite and his farts smell like nothing on earth.

KellyanneConway · 04/09/2018 10:31

YANBU. My staffie cross came with my husband and I have come to love them both equally! He is such a softie, fantastic with our children, his best friend is my cat and he is scared of the Yorkshire Terriers next door. Although strangers don't know this, and I like the way he looks a bit "hard", I feel much safer when I take him out running with me and only ever venture off road when he is with me.

Steelesauce · 04/09/2018 10:56

Im currently laid with my head on my staffie using him as a pillow Grin he's so soft and gentle, bombproof around the kids too. He sleeps outside their bedroom doors. He's daft as a brush too, I didn't intend to get a staff, he just sort of fell into our family and I'm so grateful he did.

Bad owners make bad dogs.

Yerroblemom1923 · 04/09/2018 11:17

Just get a chocolate lab... you know where you are with them Smile loving, loyal, easily trained. There's a reason they make good guide dogs.

MorningsEleven · 04/09/2018 12:41

My staffie cross came with my husband

No no no no no! Your husband came with the staffie surely?

Auldspinster · 04/09/2018 12:53

My brother's staffie also throws off heat like a radiator, great for warming your toes under.

Nikephorus · 04/09/2018 15:29

Just get a chocolate lab... you know where you are with them
A vet once told me that the worst dog they'd ever met was a chocolate lab.... I was surprised but there you have it.
Dogs have a prey drive and if they're not brought up with cats as friends, they will attack them. Most dogs are like this.
I must tell my staffie that - she backs off when we come across a cat on our walks (obviously DCats have trained her well)

MeyMary · 04/09/2018 15:52

A vet once told me that the worst dog they'd ever met was a chocolate lab...

I imagine it might often be a case of people not investing the necessary time in training them because labs are so easy and nice?

Just like certain owners of small dogs not taking the time to properly train them...

MeyMary · 04/09/2018 15:53

Btw, "easy".

No pet is truly easy imo.

They all have their needs, quirks, things a breed or species might be sensitive to etc.

TheSmallClangerWhistlesAgain · 04/09/2018 17:10

The absolute worst-tempered dog I've ever met was a springer spaniel. It was years ago and you wouldn't get away with owning him now. He was moody and aggressive and his only saving grace was that he was devoted to one of his owners and would do anything he said.

I know of a few dogs that had to be put down due to aggression: two were Labradors, one was a Staff/Lab cross that was shot by a police marksman and one was a German Shepherd. I think a Newfoundland as well, but there are conflicting stories about that one.

AvocadosBeforeMortgages · 04/09/2018 21:16

I'm in a facebook group for owners of reactive dogs; thankfully mine is at the milder end of the spectrum. The term reactive refers to overreacting to specific stimuli - most commonly dogs and / or strangers, though others, like mine, have rather weirder triggers. A reaction will involve lunging, barking, growling, snapping and there's often a bite risk. For a great many of those owners, a dog (or sometimes stranger) coming within a certain distance prevents an emergency situation and is to be avoided at any cost - most choose to walk in quiet areas, at quiet times, muzzled, wearing florescent warning coats / harnesses. They're usually incredibly dedicated owners dealing with incredibly difficult dogs. Many are making great progress with their dogs; a minority end up PTS when their dog becomes unmanageably dangerous.

Some have rescue dogs, some have had them from puppies. Some know the cause (commonly being attacked by another dog), for others there's no known cause - experienced owners who have raised puppies well and found signs of reactivity from the early months onwards. I see all manner of dogs represented in the group. You get Frenchies, labradors, cockapoos, collies, all sorts. There are some bull breeds in there but I don't think they're overrepresented compared to the general population at all. It just goes to show it can happen to anyone, with any breed.

TheSmallClangerWhistlesAgain · 04/09/2018 22:08

Lots of dogs I know are bicycle-reactive. My friend's dog completely loses the plot when someone cycles past. He's not that keen on runners either, but he doesn't lunge at them like he does at bikes. Motorbikes as well.

One of mine attacks vacuum cleaners and is much worse when they're not switched on. Judging by her body language, there's a strong play element to it, but she does go nuts.

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