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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

aibu?

50 replies

Creeper8 · 28/08/2018 17:05

I asked my sister if she could collect a large item for me from argos (she drives, I dont) she said yes and told me to reserve it. Anyway she said she would collect it either sunday or monday. On monday she said she would collect it at 5pm, it was bank holiday so was closed early so couldnt. Then she said she would collect it after her appointment today and instead has gone straight home and I didnt really want to have to remind her again as its just sounds like im bugging. I wouldnt mind if she said no she couldnt do it but aibu to be annoyed that she said she would?

OP posts:

premiertav · 28/08/2018 17:47

YABU.

There is no point in not reminding her again in case it looks like you are bugging her and then coming on here moaning about it. Why did you not just text her a reminder?

Buzzlightyearsbumchin · 28/08/2018 17:48

She said she would and she has forgotten. Your only choices are to moan about it and miss out or get it yourself.

Original poster

Creeper8 · 28/08/2018 17:51

I dont use a sling baby to heavy now. but maybe I should buy one just to collect it when she said she would.

OP posts:

MsHopey · 28/08/2018 17:51

Did you tell her it absolutely had to be done today? Maybe she didn't know there was a deadline. I'm not saying she should back out, I'm saying if you buy it online she an extra week to collect, you get it at the discounted price. At this point in time there isn't really any better options no matter how pissed off you are about it.

SoyDora · 28/08/2018 17:51

What do you want people to say? She didn’t do it. You either have to ask her again or find another way of getting it. YANBU to be annoyed, everyone is entitled to their own feelings.

bobstersmum · 28/08/2018 17:58

What sort of advice is learn to drive when the op needs the item now? It will help for future yes but its not relevant now! I would be a bit annoyed too op but she's probably busy herself.

Gazelda · 28/08/2018 18:09

No, YANBU to be annoyed.
But what are you going to do now? The ball is in your court. Either do one of the suggestions above or forget about it and move on. Don't seeth, it'll only be you that suffers.

coffeeforone · 28/08/2018 18:18

YABU not to fast track pay for it, then ask her to collect it in the next 7 days. If she still forgets then you'll automatically get a refund.

Original poster

Creeper8 · 28/08/2018 18:24

No I didnt mwntion the deadline as I assumed she would have collected it when she said. I will probably just pay more for one that can deliver but they are an extra £50.

OP posts:

FASH84 · 28/08/2018 18:31

If you pay for it online to be collected, she will know it has to be done within a certain deadline, you've not even transferred her the money! Stop being a martyr (oh I'll just pay £50 extra..) pay for it online, text your sister and day, I've paid for that item, they've days it needs to be collected by x . Done. Also if you communicate with her as petulantly as you have in here, I'm not surprised she's not falling over herself to help you. Where is the father of your children? Can he not pick it up or look after them while you do if you really won't just pay for it online and remind your sister?

Bombardier25966 · 28/08/2018 18:35

I will probably just pay more for one that can deliver but they are an extra £50.

Cuts off nose to spite face.

Original poster

Creeper8 · 28/08/2018 18:40

Erm im a lone parent. Not that that is relevant. Not gonna transfer the money till she says she is getting it otherwise it will be sat in her acc for a month.

OP posts:

FASH84 · 28/08/2018 18:41

For crying out loud, she said she will pick it up. Pay for it online, giving her more time to collect it and stop whinging.

SoyDora · 28/08/2018 18:42

Pay for it online and tell her the deadline?!
Come on, you’re really not helping yourself here...

EmUntitled · 28/08/2018 19:03

What do you want us to say? People have tried to give you suggestions (admittedly some mote feasible than others). Personally I would go with paying online, giving her longer to collect and allowing you to keep the lower price. Then text her saying "sorry to keep on about the TV but I've paid for it online and it needs to be collected by Xday. You just need the reference number which is xxx. If you can't collect it by then please let me know!"

If she doesn't collect yo u would be refunded so no risk really. I think it is fairer this way rather than her paying out £300 and then you paying her back. Did she know she would have to pay upfront?

Gazelda · 28/08/2018 19:16

In a parallel MN, there's a poster saying

"AIBU? My sis asked me to pick something up for on Argos for her. I agreed to do it, but she hasn't transferred the money and I don't have enough spare in my account. Surely I'm not being unreasonable to delay picking it up until she gives me the money? She's gone a bit 'radio silent' since yesterday, I don't know if she's got the hump with me. For full disclosure, she hasn't said there's a deadline for pickup it up, so maybe she's just not in that much of a hurry."

troodiedoo · 28/08/2018 19:33

Original poster

Creeper8 · 28/08/2018 20:27

We speak daily. Im not gonna transfer it till she says she collecting it as she needs the reservation number. We have online banking it literally will take 60 seconds! she said sunday then never mentioned it again, monday then said she will go at 5 I pointed out the shops now shut so she said she would go today and didnt.

OP posts:

SoyDora · 28/08/2018 20:32

So what do you want us to say?

BertieBott · 28/08/2018 20:35

Why not drop the call her to say, I’m bringing the kids for an hour. I’m getting the bus into town and a taxi back to get that tv.

Or, can I give you ten pounds for fuel to get the tv. It’s the last day of the offer and cheaper than a taxi. I’m still saving £40.

Louiselouie0890 · 28/08/2018 21:29

Why is it a big issue to not transfer it till she's in the shop. You don't wanna help yourself. Your sisters probably busy with her own things. She is doing you a favour you might want to remember that.

Original poster

Creeper8 · 28/08/2018 21:33

Its cool if she is busy but she could have said she couldnt I wouldnt have minded. It was her saying she would 3 days in a row.

OP posts:

MauraIsles · 28/08/2018 21:39

Just give her a call and ask if she genuinely doesn't mind picking it up, as you're worried that it's an issue for her but she's being too polite to say no, if she's honest and says she will collect it, transfer money but tell her it needs to be collected by x!

Poptart4 · 28/08/2018 22:11

Christ op this has to be the most frustrating thread ever.

You have been given loads of advice but you just keep repeating yourself.. "But she said she'd collect it"... Yes she did and you have a right to be annoyed that she let you down.

BUT if you want the item then its time to stop focusing on that and bloody ask her again to go get it for you. Its that or take one of the many suggestions you have been given.

Mulberry72 · 28/08/2018 22:17

As many PP’s have said, order it online, pay for it and tell her it needs to be collected by x date.

You could have done that in the time you’ve spent moaning on here “ but she did she’d pick it up.., “ Talk to her for goodness sake!

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