Who is being unreasonable here?

[TheDoraMilaje]

I’m away with my family abroad. We’re staying in a lovely studio room with a kitchenette and showeroom no washing washing machine facilities which is fine.

I’ve been washing some of mine and our sons clothes by hand and hanging them out to dry on the balcony as it’s so hot. My husband asked if I have washed any of his, which is clear that I haven’t. Now should I have washed some of his clothes? If we had a washing machgine would have washed all our clothes together but to do it by hand have to kneel on the floor and wash in the shower. I’ve just given our beach towels a clean and he’s now offered to help as he “wrings” them out better (I think a built of guilt kicked in maybe)

Now I’m annoyed at his tone, so when I pulled him up on it he turned around and said he’s been providing the childcare for our son while I’ve been in side the apartment he’s been “looking after our son” at the pool and bar. Now I’ve even more annoyed that he used the phrase of providing childcare and now I am the one in the wrong for being annoyed at him for asking if I’ve washed his clothes. He’s also said that I know that I am in the wrong for confronting him about it but I won’t back down

It’s all a bit silly and I’m sure it will blow over the just wanted some opinions.

Tell him you're happy to swap - leave him doing his washing and take your son back down to 'look after him' by the pool?

Yeah, tell him you'll provide childcare while he washes his clothes.

Ugh. I bet he "babysits" his DS when you're off out somewhere too. Tell him as DS is his own child, he is providing his own damned childcare!

Tell him he's not "providing childcare" or "looking after" your son. He's the FATHER, FFS. It's called being a parent!

When you say 'blow over', do you mean you back down and just get on with it.. or will he actually apologise?

Honestly, would you have been ok with him washing the kids clothes and his own but leaving yours? If so then fine. Personally I'd have been annoyed if my dh did this.

I would have been fine if he had washed his own as it is by hand. I just know he see it as my job not his. At home I wash all of our clothes. I’m not enjoying hand washing so don’t fancy adding his clothes to the pile. He has also brought enough clothes with him whereas I have started to run out.

Chuck his clothes at him, yell happy to swap and go to the bar.

You are on holiday! I wouldn't be doing any washing! So yabu for that.

Go and have fun with your family instead, washing can wait.

Stop washing his clothes full stop. He obviously now sees it as your job .Also, he's not providing childcare , he's simply being a parent.

@pebbles why is that an issue. Kids clothes are a communal responsibility where as adults are perfectly capable of washing their own clothes

He said he was sorry but I needed to take ownership of my overreaction, well something along those lines

Hmm. I'd have been annoyed if DH hadn't at least asked me if there was anything I needed washing. But we're very much a family that shares the domestic load so I think it depends on whether or not he mucks in normally.

You had to hand wash clothes on a holiday? And now he's upset because you relaxed?

Honestly, would you have been ok with him washing the kids clothes and his own but leaving yours? If so then fine. Personally I'd have been annoyed if my dh did this

This. I would have washed his but asked him to help/do something else in return. Seems a bit strange to not just do some of his at the same time.