To ask for a donation.....

[Ilovemypantry]

I am helping a friend with a GoFundMe fundraiser to help with an animal related appeal.
I am doing everything I can to help promote her appeal as I know it means so much to her (plus I am an animal lover too).
I have shared on my FB page and as many other places as I can think of.
Recently I donated to an appeal another one of my friend’s was running which was for the British Heart Foundation which I know meant a lot to him.
So my question is...AIBU to message him to ask (nicely!) if he would be kind enough to donate a small amount to my appeal?

I don't think it's fair really to single one person out like that. If you email a whole load of people, it would be fine to include him in that list

Please don't do this. It's really unfair to single people out like that and put them on the spot. You've shared it on your FB, if people want to donate they will. If they don't, that's entirely up to them. Please keep in mind also that some of us are absolutely inundated with GoFundMe requests and it's becoming increasingly difficult to donate to them all.

Absolutely not, if they want to contribute they will.
It's very bad form to put anyone on the spot like this .

I really wouldn't. You've let him know, if he wants to make a donation he will.

From my own point of view, I can't donate to all the appeals and sponsor requests I'm asked about and I do prioritise human welfare charities over animals (just my own personal opinion - nothing against anyone who wants to support animal charities). Maybe he is the same?

If someone specifally emailed me saying "i contributed to your campaign, you should contribute to mine" I would be very annoyrd and definitely would not contribute. Personally I wouldn't donate to any animal charity anyway.

No, please don’t single people out.

Just make it public and whoever wants to will donate.

EmUntitled
That was not how I would have phrased it! I know everyone doesn’t care about animals as I do ...you are obviously one of those people 😢

It isn't not caring about animals, but maybe prioritising your funds elsewhere

You can't message him directly and ask, that's so rude. Sponsorship isn't reciprocal anyway.

You contributed to his because you wanted to, others will contribute to yours because they want to.

“You are obviously one of those people”

What a ridiculous thing to say... in today’s society, we are bloody inundated with requests to donate money here, there, and everywhere. Most of us make the decision to prioritise certain charities over others. I even spend money on frivolous things for myself occasionally rather than donating that money to charity!

Donating is supposed to be selfless, not a tit-for-tat thing.

(I don’t usually donate to go fund me’s anyway, I prefer donating to a registered charity so there are rules about how my money is spent)

There are literally thousands upon thousands of charities. People often choose a particular cause or number of causes that is/are important to them and stick to them. No one can support every charity. Doesn't mean they hate other charities or think they are unworthy.

Thanks all for your helpful replies. Definitely up to usual MN standards.

I see where you are coming from OP. It’s more about him supporting you as you supported him.

Extremely rude. If he wanted to donate he would have. He clearly doesn't want to and its really contrary to the spirit of charity to try to strong arm someone into donating. It's doesbt matter how much you care about animals (or any other cause). Other people may not care as much or they may care even more than you but have no money to donate.

I think you’d be unreasonable to ask directly. Is it a “my cat is sick, help me raise £10,000 for Surgery in California” appeal, or a general one to benefit lots of animals?

it would be polite of him to reciprocate. but very wrong of you to ask directly. you've done all you can.

Bear in mind that this is your friend's appeal, not your personal one (though I understand it means a lot to you - I'm a supporter of animal charities myself). He might be less inclined to donate for friendship's sake to an appeal from someone who isn't his own friend.

It's worth considering whether you would have donated to a stranger/slight acquaintance on his recommendation (not saying you wouldn't have - just mentioning it to offer perspective).

Totally rude to ask him, just post it a few times on fb and the people who want to donate will donate.

I agree with the majority. It would be totally unreasonable to send a personal message asking for a donation.